Unlocking Your Own Magic

“Not everything that is faced can be changed. But nothing can be changed until it is faced.”  – James Baldwin

During certain months of the year, I can tell you right where you’ll find me every Tuesday night: Most of my family and I will be enjoying healthy snacks, sitting in front of CBS’s The Biggest Loser. I absolutely, positively love this show. Are you kidding me? It doesnt’ get any better than seeing people overcome personal demons and find a way to make their dreams come true.

Every time someone hits a personal goal or “mark,” such as getting below 200 pounds (or 300 pounds), I find myself wiping tears of joy.

Something that contestants are asked early on (and often asked to repeat) is WHY they want to lose the weight and WHAT they have to gain by being healthier. The doctors, trainers, nutritionists – none of them – can make the magic happen without the individual realizing where they are and what they stand to gain by refusing to stay there.

The Magic Moment

The initial magic moment, in my opinion, isn’t when the contestant is chosen for the show. It’s not when they discover whether they have Jillian or Bob as their trainer. It certainly isn’t when they find out what color of t-shirt they’ll be wearing or when they learn how often they’ll be eating lunch at Subway from now on.

The initial magic moment is when they stand on the scales, on national television, after arriving at camp. When they have to face the numbers that hamburgers, fries, pop, fried chicken, and ice cream have tallied up. When a contestant see the numbers, and their face fills with shock, shame, or tears -my heart always breaks for them. Yet, I’ve seen the show often enough to know that just behind the tears is magic waiting to happen. Without that initial moment, the magic would never happen.

It’s like, right then, a magic wand is brought out of a box that’s been inside of a guarded, locked safe. The guard is ignorance and the lock is denial. The bad news is, they’re a potent, life robbing, effectual duo. The good news is, once you get past them? Magic. Happens.

Ignorance and denial don’t just pull guard duty for weight loss, unfortunately. They love to lock us out of the life we want and they work hard to do so.

The Difference Between Ignorance and Denial

Before anyone e-mails me nasty words that hurt my feelings, by ignorance I mean simply being unaware. If we don’t take a good, hard look at… for example…. our upper arms, we’ll never fully know if they’re jiggly or toned. (And would every female in the country like to join me in thanking our gorgeous, gorgeous first lady for getting the emphasis on arms?! I didn’t sign up for this – that is, my arms didn’t sign up for this! Someone needs some dumbbells. If she can lift them into the cart.) If we never stand before a mirror in a shirtless top, we’ll never know the state of emergency that our arms are in!

That’s ignorance. Blissful ignorance.

However, if we know full well that our arms are the stuff nightmares are made of and simply choose to wear long sleeved tops and never allow them to see the light of day, we’re in denial. We aren’t facing the truth – because, frankly, the truth is ugly. And jiggly.

Making Your Own Magic

Think for a minute about the things ignorance and denial may have locked away from you. There may be some amazing, incredible, life-changing goodies completely within your reach and power! The body you’ve always wanted to dress, the home you’ve always wanted to kick around in, the car you’ve always wanted to drive, the relationships you’ve always wanted to enjoy… The you you’ve always dreamed of being.

When you read the paragraph above, one or two things probably made your heart stand still. Whether it was the thought of sweeter relationships, the goal of great furniture for your home, or if (like me) you’re still thinking about Michelle Obama’s arms – there’s something that, in your heart of hearts, you know you want desperately.

That’s not the hard part. We’re all pretty good at identifying what we want, aren’t we. I exercise those muscles every time I go to the mall.

However, wanting isn’t going to budge ignorance or denial one bit. They stand there laughing at our wants – taunting us, even.

The deal breaker is this: We have to figure out why we don’t already have what we want! For example, my husband is freaking good at his job. He has a fantastic reputation in his field for being the best. He has it because he has worked for it and worked hard. He wanted to be the best, so he didn’t rest until he was.

I am, if I can say so, a very good cook. I honestly had rather eat my own cooking than anyone else’s. It has always been extremely important to me, so it’s something I work hard for and take pride in.

If we have something (whether it’s a Grand Cherokee or a trait), it’s probably because we worked for it. If we don’t have something, it’s probably because we either haven’t figured out how to get it or we’re too lazy to work for it. Either way, no one’s going to do it for us. We have to take a good, long look inward and identify what it is we want. Then we have to ask ourselves, “Why do I not already have this?”

Hello, Magic Moment….

So Nice to Meet You!

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Tagged as: dreams, goals, Self Help, self improvement