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Archives for October 2008

You’re Going to Love O’s Big Book of Happiness (Review)

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O's Big Book of Happiness

Every once and again I read a book that I love SO much that I practically run to my computer to tell the world about it. Naturally, I can’t my review to the entire world – so I end up just telling as many people as possible, by giving it a shout out on all of my blogs.

This one’s a winner, y’all.

O’s Big Book of Happiness: The Best of O, The Oprah Magazine: Wisdom, Wit, Advice, Interviews, and Inspiration is a big, beautiful book with Oprah’s gorgeous smile warming the cover.

My daughter, Stephany, and I are both huge fans of Oprah, so when the book came in the mail, we immediately started scrambling for reading rights. Unfortunately, when we came into the house, I had meatloaf, mashed potatoes, creamed corn, and rolls to make and Steph? Well, she had a big beautiful new book to read.

O’s Big Book of Happiness is a compilation of O Magazine’s best stories, articles, wit, wisdom, and advice. For those of us who have seen our magazine purchasces come to a stand still (thank you grouchy economy), this book is even more appreciated. It’s like several huge stacks of magazines rolled into one big inspirational and glamorous book.

I’ve always found Oprah to be incredibly uplifting, motivating, encouraging, and inspiring – all while being just as entertaining.

Anyone who doesn’t love this woman doesn’t watch, read, or listen to this woman! Honestly, there’s nothing not to love.

Through willpower, determination, intelligence, hard work, and perseverance – she made herself a household name. Along the way, Oprah has helped more people than any one person could ever hope to count. I recently overheard an interviewer refer to someone in the business world as the “Oprah” of his industry.

Wrong.

If your name isn’t associated with giving to those who have less than you and improving the lives of children – you’re most definitely not the “Oprah” of anything.  Don’t just throw the name around  – because few are anywhere near deserving a comparison.

Reading the positive, uplifting stories in O’s Big Book of Happiness: The Best of O, The Oprah Magazine: Wisdom, Wit, Advice, Interviews, and Inspiration makes you feel as though Oprah is in the room with you, introducing you to her friends and encouraging them to inspire you and lift you up – teaching you something along the way.

The book is positively wonderful and has been awarded the prominent place on the table in our living room – you know the type, the table that likes to showcase “important and impressive” books, pictures, etc. This great-natured book, with it’s helpful disposition, wonderful sense of humor, and sparkling personality is so lovely, it begs for such positioning.

In a recent post, I sounded the trumpet for adopting new good habits. We agreed to read more, laugh more, love more, complain less, and be more thankful – among other things (I’m conveniently leaving out the water and exercise, aren’t I?). Buying this book would be a perfect step in the right direction! Oprah and her “friends” will provide all of the inspiration, motivation, and insight you could ever hope for.

There are over 100 wonderfully (wonderfully) written articles in this powerful book.  Each article is actually a chapter in, and of, itself.  Trust me, after reading each you’ll want nothing more than to just spend some time soaking in what you just read.

The first article I read was one written by Oprah, herself, about a special dog of hers’ named Gracie.  I laughed. I cried. I was moved. I was inspired.

The second article I read was by an author named Martha Beck.  The article was titled “The Cure For Self Consciousness” and packed more of a punch  than any book I’ve ever read on the subject.  It summed the whole process up with one word.  I’ve used this one word several times since reading the article and I swear to you on my Starbucks card, this is powerful.

If you want to know the one word… read the book! Sorry to resort to trickery, but that’s how much I want you to read this book.

There are articles about relationships, beauty, fitness, health, cooking, and more.  Oprah interviews Bobby Kennedy, Jr. about the environment and his infamous family.  Queen Latifah gives her “Aha” moment – describing the point in her life when she realized she didn’t need to change herself to “fit” any mold.

I actually don’t have the other O books yet – O’s Guide to Life: The Best of O, the Oprah Magazine (The Oprah Magazine) or Live Your Best Life: A Treasury of Wisdom, Wit, Advice, Interviews, and Inspiration from O, The Oprah Magazine… Emphasis on yet.

I’m going to need a bigger table in my living room.

I hope you’ll buy a copy of this book today. After you read through the wonderful stories, I know you’ll want to put a copy in the hands of your loved ones. This book would make an excellent Christmas present – presented with a subscritpion to O Magazine, I guarantee your gift will be appreciated and talked about for months and months. What’s more, they’ll think about YOU every single time they curl up and read.

Buy. This. Book. Today! – O’s Big Book of Happiness: The Best of O, The Oprah Magazine: Wisdom, Wit, Advice, Interviews, and Inspiration

Sofia J and Happy to Be Me – Refreshing Pop Music with A Lot of Heart

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I have a fresh, talented, and beautiful new artist I’d love to introduce you to. Her name is Sofia J and I think you’ll love her music.

Sofia J’s new cd is called “Happy to Be Me” and I had an opportunity to listen to it yesterday. She has a beautiful, strong, and unique voice – I honestly can’t compare it to anyone’s. There’s an uplifting, positive, self-confident stride to her music that’s also hard to find a comparison for.

Can you say refreshing?! I mean, it seems like every other song by a female – whether it’s pop, country, rock, rap, blues – is about one of the following:

  • He did me wrong, so now I’m going to break out my can of whoop ass on his car.
  • He did me really wrong, so now I’m going to meet him at the door with a gun.
  • I’m crying because he doesn’t love me.
  • I’m beating someone up tonight.

So much negativity.  So much anger.  Why in the world are these girls so mad?!?!

I popped in my Sofia J cd yesterday when I took off for the store.  I took the long way, so I could enjoy every song.  I loved the cd (and EVERY song) so much, I took the long way back home.  Sofia’s music makes you feel good, and if that’s not the best thing that can be said about a cd, I don’t know what is.

Sofia J

More About Sofia J

Sofia J, who was born in New York City, released her CD, “Happy To Be Me”, in August 2008. The highly catchy title track, “A Taste (The LaLa Song)” was selected for Gossip Girl, One Tree Hill, and a new ABC Family show, “The Secret Life of the American Teenager.”

Another one of Sofia J’s songs, “Do You Believe In Me Now,” is featured as the theme for MTV’s Emmy Award-winning television show, MADE. Sofia J once performed the National Anthem at Madison Square Garden (for high-profile NY Knicks game) to a standing ovation. She is also a highly respected songwriter and a recipient of the Abe Oleman scholarship for Excellence in Songwriting.

You can read more about Sofia J on her website, Sofia J.com.

Sofia J

Sofia J Mp3 Downloads:


How to MAKE Good Habits, While BREAKING Bad Habits

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You are what you do.
Habits are to your life pretty much what gas is to your car. They keep you moving along – but whether they carry you to a better place or not depends entirely on the habit.

Bad habits can hold talented people back while good habits carry less talented people on ahead.

Many, many posts can be written on bad habits (in fact, they have), but essentially, we’ll get rid of our bad habits when we’ve finally had enough of them. I don’t want to spend too much time with bad habits in this post, I’d rather approach habits with another tactic – by focusing on good habits.

How about this? Let’s apopt so many great habits that we put the squeeze play on bad habits. I’m thinking that if we add about 10, that’ll leave less room for the bad crowd. I remember a television special about healthy eating that aired a few years ago. A nutritionist pointed out that if you fill your plate up with healthy vegetables and fruit, you actually get to eat more food. All you have to do is replace the unhealthy food with healthier alternatives – and you almost always get to enjoy more of the healthy food.

“Bad habits are easier to abandon today than tomorrow.”  – Yiddish Proverb

The good squeezes out the bad, so you’re left with a double-sided win: You get rid of things that are bad for you and you make room for things that are good for you.

So what sort of healthy habits could we bring to our life’s plate? Below’s a buffet of suggestions, I know you’ll be able to come up with more. Come up with as many as you want, of course, but remember that “bite-sized” portions are always easiest to handle. Don’t put more on your plate than you’ll actually be able to eat!

  1. Start getting up a little earlier.  I realize that when the weather’s cool it’s really tough to start getting up earlier.  The body wants to sleep later, for crying out loud!  But, I’ve been on both sides of the 6:00 am, and I can say, without hesitation, that every corner of your day will be better if you get a running start at it.  Also, the quiet hours of the morning are the perfect way to glide into your day.  Rushing around after being summoned by a hateful alarm clock isn’t good for the psyche.  Mornings just weren’t meant to be so hectic.
  2. Read more.  When you open a book, you open your mind and literally pour knowledge into it.  Knowledge is power.  Knowledge is power.  Knowledge is power.
  3. Laugh more.  Laughter is great for you – body and soul.  It doesn’t matter if anyone laughs with you, it doesn’t matter if anyone laughs at you.   Just laugh!
  4. Complain less.  Starting tomorrow, do a little self improvement exercise:  Each time you feel tempted to say something negative, make yourself say something positive instead.  I’ve never understood why anyone would want to spread misery and gloominess.  I always wonder, “Do they hate life that much?”
  5. Drink more water.  I read a lot of articles and books about health and there are several things they all agree on (the other is right on this one’s heels at #6!).  One of the things every physician, health expert, nutritionist, and great aunt tells us is this:  Drink more water.  There has to be something to it.
  6. Get at least 30 minutes of activity each day.  Bronchitis has had me in a choke hold for weeks, but I was feeling a lot better today. So I did some intense work around the house.  I expected to feel like I’d been hit by a bus afterwards, but I feel great.  I’d been sitting on my duff and sipping soup for so long I’d forgotten how good it feels to be active.
  7. Stop assuming people know how you feel.  Even if they have an idea, do you know how much it will mean to them if you tell them?   Most of us can recall certain things that our loved ones have said to us that meant the world.  In fact, the words meant so much that we still carry them around with us today.  Maybe it was a dad saying, “I’m SO proud of you.”  Maybe it was a mother telling us that we’re just the daughter/son she’d always hoped for.  Why is it that so often it’s when we’re in the middle of altercations that these sentiments come out?  Then, they’re often followed with a “But…”  Any sentiment followed by a but isn’t much of a sentiment!  This tactic is simply the art of putting conditions on the words.  They certainly aren’t the sentiments we carry with us.  It’s the ones that come out of the blue – not as a prerequisite to what all we’re doing wrong and not to soften any blows.  If you love someone, tell them every single day.  If you’re proud of them, tell them – WITHOUT BUTS!
  8. Put yourself in time-out.   In the same way we put children in “time out” when they show signs of being stressed out or overly tired, we could benefit just as much.  Sometimes our nerves just need to unravel and they can do that better when there isn’t a lot going on. Not only will you benefit by learning to just get away and unwind with a good old-fashioned time out, everyone around you will benefit, too. You’ll spare them the nightmare of watching you throw a temper tantrum.
  9. Become a more aware and cautious driver.   I have to admit that, as a teenager, I tended to drive pretty fast.  But, years ago, I began to slow down and drive oh so much more carefully when I looked around me to see my vehicle surrounded by future drivers.  They’re watching.  What do they see?  Even if there aren’t future drivers with you, paying attention to what’s going on around you can save lives at best, headaches at worst.  Texting while driving, speeding, road rage, playing mind games (“Oh, yeah, if you want to get on my bumper, I’ll just slow down… You wanna hit me? Why, you can just buy me a new car, sucker…“) – these are all things that can get you killed, hurt, ticketed, or arrested.  I don’t think we’re interested in any of those, are we?
  10. Be thankful.  People are filled to their eyeballs with negative thoughts and words lately – but we still have it amazingly good.  I know I don’t have to tell you that – but I’m pretty sure we all need a reminder every now and again.  I remember a shallow little wake up call I got one time while we were living in Florida.  I had put on a tank top and shorts and was complaining to one of my daughters (oh, heck to anyone who’d listen) about my arms.  They weren’t “tank top arms…” etc.  I was cutting them up pretty good.  Then we walked over to the beach and the first person I saw made me want to cry with shame.  She was around 20 and only had one arm.  I’ve never forgotten that day.  And I honestly don’t believe I’ve complained about my arms since.  Either of them.  There’s a lot to said for being thankful for what we have, isn’t there?

When you ADD good habits to your day, you’ll actually BREAK bad habits without even realizing it.  Now go pour yourself a glass of water and read a great book!

“You leave old habits behind by starting out with the thought, ‘I release the need for this in my life’.” – Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

 

Forget the Glass, Are the Moments of Your Day Empty or Full?!

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How do you spend your time?
My youngest daughter, Stephany, and I have been talking a lot lately about eating healthier. We really worked ourselves up into a frenzy over it today and have vowed to watch what we eat more carefully. Both of us have been doing a great deal of research on what foods do for (or to) us.

We’ve been focusing a lot of our wrath toward “empty calories” lately – those foods and drinks that either provide us with NO nutrients or provide us with potentially harmful fats, sodium, etc. How much smarter would it be to replace these harmful (at worst) or empty (at best) foods and drinks with foods or drinks that earn their keep and deserve our loyalty? For example, why not replace Diet Dr. Pepper (one of my guiltiest pleasures) with antioxidant-rich unsweetened tea all the time? I love tea and am even one of the rare birds that adores green tea, so there’s no reason for me to keep on chugging the good doctor, no matter how delicious I find him to be.

I was thinking earlier about how this same premise can be used in our lives – away from the table. If we take a really close look at our daily lives, we’ll find “empty” activities, habits, and thoughts. Some are fairly harmless but pointless, while others are down-right damaging.

What if these “empty” activities, habits, and thoughts were replaced with “productive” activities, habits, and thoughts? Could we handle the life improvement that would come from all of that self-improvement? I’d sure like to try!

Below are a few ideas to get your own thoughts and ideas flowing:

  • Instead of listening to entertaining, but fairly pointless, morning talk shows on your way to work – why not make a habit of listening to quality podcasts (itunes has every category you can think of) or great books on CD?  Learning something new is never, ever, ever not cool.
  • I love great tv shows as much as anyone (Heaven help the person who gets between me and The Biggest Loser), but if we put as much effort into physical activity as we did into program activity, we’d never worry about  our Levi’s being too tight ever again. I don’t like it any more than you do but it’s just common sense.
  • What if, instead of gossiping or nitpicking, we put our God-given gift of speech to better use and had quality conversations with the people in our lives?  What if we tried to accentuate the positive and build one another up?  What if we made it our goal to help as many people as we could each day?   For one thing.. It’ll all come back to you.  Karma? I’m a card-carrying member of her fan club.  She’s a faithful diva.  Never misses a beat.
  • If we get up from the internet after 2 hours, and we walk away without any benefit, inspiration, or knowledge, didn’t we just throw 2 hours out the back door?  2 hours that won’t even try to come back?
  • We should even be more aware of what we think about.  Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “A man is what he thinks about all day long.” (How I’m not 5’2″ of chocolate escapes me.)
  • If one has an incredibly unhealthy habit such as smoking, they need to move Heaven and earth and make it a thing of the past.  I don’t want to be a cyber nag, but I want everyone to be as healthy as possible and live a really long time.  Trade that habit in for a healthy one – and the sooner the better.  Come on, if I can step away from the diet soda, you can step away from the cigarettes.  We’ll just be grouchy together for a few weeks. Deal?
  • If you regularly spend a couple of hours in the evening reading novels and newspapers, (or watching tv or surfing the web), cut into that time and use it to clean and organize your house.  We feel better when things are tidy.  As a bonus, housecleaning is an activity and insists on burning some of our calories for us.

These are just a few ideas, I know you can think of a lot more.  Times are pretty tricky financially, and weight problems are as common as they are unhealthy.  Is it any wonder more and more people are getting so frustrated and overwhelmed?

One of the tricks, in my opinion, is to simply look at how you spend your time:

  • Passive or Productive?
  • Constructive or Destructive?
  • Helpful or Hurtful?
  • Empty or Full?

One more thought (keep in mind I’m a wife/mom above all else, so I’m biased):  Time spent with your family is never wasted.

How to Turn Your Life Around and Defeat Your Personal “Demons”

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I was reading the Parade section of the Sunday Paper this morning and found an interview with Christian Slater especially interesting.

As the writer points out, Christian Slater really resembles Jack Nicholson. It’s a wonder they haven’t been cast in father/son roles by now. If a movie is ever made about Jack Nicholson, they won’t have to look far for the lead actor.

As a movie fanatic, it’s only natural that this little tidbit jumped out at me. But the part of the article where Christian Slater talks about the moment he realized he needed to turn his life around…. that’s the part that grabbed me by the shoulder and said, “Wow, this is good stuff!”

You may remember that he was in trouble at one time for drinking and drugs.  He was even arrested – as difficult as that is to imagine. He has been sober for years now, but doesn’t expect, or want, to be congratulated for it. In his words, “It’s like expecting a reward for running out of a burning building.”

Now, that’s an attitude worth applauding, loving, and recognizing.  I think it’s an attitude that’ll also keep him (and anyone in similar-fitting shoes) on the right track.

As a advocate of Self Help –  I also loved the following part of the interview. Christian’s words are in bold, the non-bold words are those of the author of the article, James Kaplan:

—————————-

…Cleaning up his act became a long, hard process.

“I sat down and asked myself, ‘What are the things that haunt me or make me feel insecure, and what can I do about them? Instead of spending the rest of my life going, ‘I am just the victim of this stuff,’ what can I do to tackle it and get over it?'”

So he made a to-do list. Or rather a to-change list.

—————————-

Now THAT’S a list! Come on, you know me – I’m all about lists. By this point of the article, I was so turned on I couldn’t sit still. Within one article, I had Hollywood, Self Help, AND the voyeuristic-ally charged account of someone making a list.

If the article had included the men drinking coffee (Slater drank water. Eh.), eating chocolate (none mentioned), and plans for saving all the animals in the world, I’d have probably passed out from excitement.

Seriously, this is absolute perfection. You have a young man who knows he needs to change his approach to life. So, where does he start. With himself. As Cicero said, “Nobody can give you wiser advice than yourself.” I love how Christian Slater worded it: “‘What are the things that haunt me…”

“Haunting” is exactly what personal demons do and we all have them in our lives – whether they’re insecurities, losses, childhood issues, resentments, mistakes, guilt… Sadly, the list goes on.

They find you, wherever you happen to be and interrupt whatever it is you happen to be doing. Like a ghost in a campy horror film – they seem intent on destroying your happiness and, ultimately, your world.

If you let them.

The best part of the article is when Christian Slater turns and faces the “ghosts” instead of running from them. They don’t like to be faced, you know. Confrontation’s not what they’re about – they just like to haunt. He turned his life around and now has a very happy family life (with two beautiful children) as well as a successful career.  I hope he has much continued success – he’s worked hard for it.

To read the interview online, click HERE.