• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

Self Help Daily

Inspirational and Self Help Blog with a Save the World Complex...

  • Home
    • Tour Self Help Daily
    • Self Help Daily’s Archives
    • Privacy
      • Affiliate Disclosure
  • Contact
  • Inspirational Quotes
  • Self Help
    • Positive Thought
    • Health
    • Mental Fitness
    • Relationships
    • Self Growth
    • How to Be Happy
  • Book Reviews
You are here: Home / 2010 / Archives for September 2010

Archives for September 2010

Could This Be the Best Quote About Life Ever?

September 30, 2010 by Joi 2 Comments

Best Quote about Life

“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body. But rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly proclaiming, “Wow, what a ride!”  –  Unknown

Tomorrow, when I’m back on my soap box telling you what you should eat… shouldn’t eat…. reminding you to take care of yourself.. and, by all means, telling you to put down the cigarettes while you can still breathe – do not remind me of the quote above.

I’ll deny ever seeing it, let alone re-posting it.

But for now, yeah, let’s all vow to concentrate MORE on the ride and less on the destination.  I can’t help but think about Survivor and another personal favorite, The Biggest Loser.  Contestants – even on day 1 always talk about the finale and the big check.

Ironically, it’s usually the ones who are too busy enjoying the ride to worry about the end that actually walk away with everything.  I’d be willing to bet the rest wish they’d simply enjoyed the once-in-a-lifetime ride rather than tried to steer so hard.

I’ve read these types of reflections before.  Not from reality show contestants, mind you, but from people just like you and me – people who are at the end of the ride, wishing they’d simply enjoyed the once-in-a-lifetime ride rather than tried to steer so hard.

May we all skid in broadside!

More Quotes About Life

Queen Fatima

Filed Under: Daily Quote, Positive Thought Tagged With: quote, quote about life

Holy Mole’ Comic Strip: Peace

September 27, 2010 by Joi 3 Comments

Click the image for a larger view.

Filed Under: How to Be Happy Tagged With: Holy Mole', inspirational

Brooding is a Sport Only For Fools

September 27, 2010 by Joi 7 Comments

brood: (verb)  1. to think or worry persistently or moodily about; ponder: He brooded the problem.
2. to dwell on a subject or to meditate with morbid persistence (usually fol. by over or on).

Have you ever known a brooder? Brooders study on a particular thing or situation at length, focusing all of their energy on it until the brooding drains the energy right out of them.

Even worse than knowing a brooder, of course, would be BEING a brooder.  How exhausting.

Do you tend to brood? Do you often fixate on things to the point of having the same thoughts on a repeat cycle? If you do have this unproductive tendency, I hope this article can help you rethink your course of action the next time your brooding mechanisms kick in.

Look at the second definition above…  oh, never mind looking, I’ll bring it to you: to dwell on a subject or to meditate with morbid persistence

Morbid persistence. What part of that sounds good?

I am incredibly lucky, I have to say.  I don’t live amongst brooders.  Myself, my husband, our daughters, and even our cats don’t brood.  If you were to think about brooding as e-mail, we’re from the school of “OPEN the e-mail, DEAL with the e-mail, DELETE the e-mail, and MOVE ON to the next.”

It’s the way I approach my own e-mail actually.  My husband teases me a lot about the amount of time I spend with e-mail but I get a very high volume of it and I don’t want it to just sit like a lazy great uncle.  I hate the thought of someone wanting something and having to wait for me to get to them. Not only do I hear from a great number of people in regards to my blogs, I also oversee a number of blogs/websites that we host. Sometimes people have problems they need help with, sometimes they just want to run something by me.

If someone needs my help, I want them to have it asap.

Some people allow their e-mail to build up to the hundreds.  Doing so seems kind of like  a waste to me.  They just sit there, taking up space – not accomplishing anything.

Brooding is a lot like unopened, undealt with e-mail.  Except it’s far worse, actually.  Not only does brooding take up time, thought, and energy – it actually makes the problem(s) or perceived problem(s) bigger than they really are.

Have you ever noticed that worry clobbers rational thought?  Brooding eats rational thoughts alive. It’s happened to all of us.  A noise in the night? – Has to be a burglar and, well yes, as a matter of fact he is on the roof.

Your 15 year old son’s hair is longer than your hair was at his age.  And you’re the mom.  Brooding on his beautiful locks will only compound the problem. You’ll conjure up various and assorted scenarios and each one will star your son as a failure, a ne’r do well, and possibly a bum.  Are these thoughts really what you want to focus on?  Do you really want to continually focus on and dwell upon negative images of your son?

He’s 15!

It’s hair!

Brooding is worry with OCD.  It gets locked in and just can’t stop.

The next time you find yourself focusing on worrisome thoughts or brooding about things that “could” happen or brooding over situations you “wish were different” – take action.

  1. Ask yourself if there is a present problem or if you’re simply fretting over a potential problem.  If you’re worried that your vehicle won’t make it another year, it’s a potential problem. If it’s in the driveway and doesn’t seem to want to ever leave, no matter how many times you turn the key – it’s a present problem.
  2. If you have a potential problem, stop wasting valuable energy on situations that may possibly be around the corner and take care of what’s currently on your street – right in front of you.
  3. Parents, this is for you us: Stop brooding over every single thing your child does, says, and/or wears. I know, I know, I know.  Parents who love their children will worry about their children but constantly brooding about all the little things will drain you and you won’t have anything left.  And there’s always this: You’ll drive everyone crazy in the process.  Never  good.

Maybe this would be a good time to remind you of that definition again: to dwell on a subject or to meditate with morbid persistence.

“There is nothing that wastes the body like worry; and one that has any faith in God should be ashamed to worry about anything whatsoever.” – Mahatma Gandhi

Actual Steps to Help Overcome Brooding

First of all, memorize the definition above and repeat it to yourself when you feel yourself beginning to worry or brood. If you promise to memorize it, I promise not to hit you with it anymore.

Second of all, ask yourself if the subject of your worry falls under the category potential situation or present situation.

If the situation is a present problem or issue, leave brooding mode and enter action mode.  Do what you can to alleviate the problem.  If it’s beyond your means, ask for help.  Back to me and my e-mail: When someone we host has a problem with their website, I address the problem as soon as possible.  If it’s beyond my reach, I find the appropriate person to refer them to.  Either way, the e-mail is opened, dealt with, and deleted.

There’s no need to worry with it anymore because it has been taken care of.

If the situation is a potential problem or issue, ask yourself how reasonable you’re being and be brutally honest.  If the potential situation could very well become a present situation, again enter action mode.  At the very least, share the concern with someone else.  They, very often, can help you see that your worry is out of proportion to the actual circumstances.  Other times, they may have extra information or advice that could set your mind entirely at ease.

You’ll never know unless you ask.

Last of all, hit the delete button. Once you have ascertained what (if anything) you can do about the situation, rest assured that you’ve done all you can.  Give yourself permission to enjoy life and allow everyone around you to do the same.

Here’s a quick exercise to illustrate the power of brooding.

Stare at the picture of the beautiful chicken below.  Stare directly at her for an entire minute.  Imagine what she might be thinking, what it’d be like to raise chickens, what you’d name her (hey, why not?), what it’d be like to live on a farm… Then, after a minute, continue reading below your new friend’s picture….

Chicken (The Homeplace LBL}

During the time you spent fixated on the chicken, you didn’t think about or acknowledge anything else.  For that minute (or ever how long you lasted!), the only thing in your world was you and a darn good-looking chicken staring back at you.

Do you see the implications?  This was just one minute.  Can you see the potential harm negative, destructive thoughts can do to a person when they spend endless minutes and hours wrapped up in them?  If you spend day in, day out brooding on miserable thoughts and tragic scenarios, what must that do to your psyche?!?!

Treat your thoughts carefully, they’re far more influential than you realize.  Thoughts always grow into words and actions.  Now tell me that’s not reason enough to entertain worthwhile, constructive, and positive thoughts as opposed to foolish, destructive, and negative ones.

We are the product of our thinking, so it is important that we choose carefully where to focus our mental energy. – Dr. Charles Stanley

Filed Under: Daily Quote, Positive Thought Tagged With: Gandhi quotes, Positive Thought, Self Help, worry

Mantra From the Monkey Bars

September 22, 2010 by Joi 7 Comments

When our girls were little, they loved going to parks and playgrounds.  It was exhausting just watching them run from one thing to the next.  Naturally, they wanted to make it as challenging as possible on their young, overly protective parents – so they’d each head off in different directions.

Emily’s favorite playground destination was the swings.  Stephany’s was the merry-go-round.  Brittany’s was whichever one she happened to be on at the time.

Stephany, the youngest, always had to do what her big sisters did.  Never mind the fact that she was younger, smaller, and in her mother’s play book, supposed to stay a baby.  When she wasn’t much bigger than a penguin, Steph decided that she wanted to master the monkey bars as beautifully as Emily and Brittany had.

Her little arms could barely even reach, so her daddy and I would hold her up there trying to encourage her to go from rung to rung.

The thing was, she never wanted to let go of the first one.  Emily would stand nearby coaching her, “Steph! You have to let go of THIS one so you can reach out for THAT one.”  Brittany would have echoed the sentiments but she would have had to slow down from warp speed to do so.

Not happening.

Still not happening.

So, we had one little live wire bopping from one thing to the next, a daddy smiling because everything “the baby” did was too cute to believe, one tiny life coach with all the answers (if only little sister would listen) and one mother telling her youngest child, “That’s okay, baby, let’s go sit down.  Big bad playground.”

I’m reasonable like that.

Stephany and her monkey bars actually make a perfect illustration for those of us who are much bigger.  Much older.  We all have certain areas in life where someone could very well yell out to us, “You have to let go of THIS one so you can reach out for THAT one!”

Very often, the secret to success and the key to overcoming life’s setbacks lie in these simple words: Let go and move on.

Some people have trouble moving on from a broken relationship.  This particular refusal to let go and move on drives me all kinds of crazy.  What kind of happiness and joy could they be missing out on?!  If they keep looking back, they just might miss something beautiful right in front of them.  The one person in the world who could make them forget all about the other one might be just around the corner.

What a shame it’d be to miss them!

Some people are guilty of doing what I call an Emotional Return to the Scene of the Crime. Something bad happened to them (loss of a loved one, a broken relationship, loss of a dream house, loss of a job, financial catastrophe, business failure….) but instead of letting go and moving on, they sort of keep one hand on the rung in the past.

Some people hold on so tightly and for so long it’s a wonder their hand doesn’t fuse to the symbolic rung.

As long as you hold on to something behind you, you aren’t completely free to reach out to what’s in front of you.  I’m all for putting up a good fight and I’m all about perseverance but, let’s be honest, sometimes it’s time to just let go.

If you can think of anything you’ve been clinging to that you know – in your heart of hearts – is holding you back, please consider declaring your freedom from it today.  Let go. Move on.  Be free.

“You have to let go of THIS one so you can reach out for THAT one!”

Filed Under: Positive Thought Tagged With: inspiration, motivation

Holy Mole’ Comic Strip: Unselfishness

September 20, 2010 by Joi 1 Comment

Precious!

Filed Under: How to Be Happy

  • Go to page 1
  • Go to page 2
  • Go to Next Page »

Primary Sidebar

Self Help Blog

Cat on Pine Mountain , Kentucky

Welcome to Self Help Daily, a blog devoted to helping you get the most from life by getting the most from yourself!

Read the story behind the picture above in How to Live in the Moment.

Positive Affirmation Cards


Positive Affirmation Cards (Amazon)

Contact Joi

My name is Joi (“Joy”)! I am the animal lover behind Self Help Daily.

To contact me, please do so through e-mail (joitsigers @ gmail.com). Thanks and I look forward to hearing from you! ~ Joi

Self Help Blog Updates

  • Five Ways That You May Be Affecting Your Brain Health Without Realizing It
  • Create a Zen Room in Your Home (Perfect for Creating a Home Sweet Haven)
  • Quick Thought About Interests… Basically, the More You Have, the Better!
  • How Podcasts Grew to Be Full of Information on Motivation
  • 4 Ways You Can Try To Quit Smoking
  • Simple Ways To Make Your Working Life Easier And Less Stressful
  • Exercise Options That Will Improve Your Physical and Mental Health
  • How to Look and Feel Your Best Everyday

Featured Quote Graphics

Don't Quit Quote Graphic

Dr. Seuss Quote About Being Who You Are

Booker T. Washington Quote About Hate

Wayne Dyer Quote About Karma

Quote About Habits

Footer

Inspirational Quotes

  • Abraham Lincoln Quotes
  • Billy Graham Quotes
  • Booker T. Washington Quotes
  • Dale Carnegie Quotes
  • Maya Angelou Quotes
  • Mark Twain Quotes
  • Martin Luther King, Jr. Quotes
  • Norman Vincent Peale Quotes

More Inspirational Quotes

❖ Self Help Daily Updates



Overcoming Empty Nest Syndrome

One of the questions I hear the most from my readers is, "How can I cope with empty nest syndrome?" I'll try to deal with this sensitive subject as often as possible. If you have any suggestions, I hope you'll contribute to the conversations!

  • Coping With Empty Nest Syndrome
  • Don't Just Cope in an Empty Nest, Thrive!
  • How to Be Happy in an Empty Nest
  • Overcoming Empty Nest Syndrome
Copyright Self Help Daily 2021