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Halloween Post: So What are You Afraid of?

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Overcoming Fear

Fear is a contraction; acceptance is an expansion. Each moment we choose one or the other. – John Selby, “Expand This Moment“

My whole  family (as in the humans…  the cats, guinea pig and hamster didn’t partake in the evening’s events) attended a special ghost tour in Owensboro last night. F-U-N! I won’t get into ghosts, monsters, or things that go bump in the night right now because…

  1. I’m not trying to scare the wits out of anyone.
  2. I’m not trying to scare the wits out of myself!

However, as ghost stories were told during the evening, I watched people’s faces.  Some people in the group (especially men, oddly enough) pretended not to be listening. They’d watch the traffic drive by, look at their phones, or seemingly be engrossed in what the sidewalk was doing at the moment.  “I don’t hear any of this, so it can’t be happening….”

Some were so enthralled by every word that I was certain if I’d screamed “BOO!,” about 8 women would have had heart attacks, some men would have climbed trees, and half of the rest would’ve thrown themselves on the ground, curled up in a fetal position, and cried for their mommies.

You’ll be glad to know I kept my “BOO!” under wraps.

Some people (including most of my family members… most, mind you) were like me – watching, listening, and enjoying the evening’s entertainment.  We were thinking, “This could all be true… or it could all be not true. Either way, I ain’t scared of no ghost.”   I did, in fact, channel my inner Ghost Busters.

This morning, while baking brownies, I thought back to a few of the people’s expressions during some of the stories.  They remind me of three very powerful and true words: Fear is Paralyzing.

As the day wore on, I thought more about fear. Given the fact that today is Halloween, I suppose this is appropriate enough. I have Halloween Punch to make, as well as a big Halloween meal, so (for once!) this post won’t be a long one. I just had a few thoughts I wanted to throw out there.

How Fear Weakens You

We all have things we’re afraid of. We each have our own fears.  As for me, my biggest fears are snakes and tight places.  I’m actually claustrophobic – in the worst possible way.  I had an MRI once, years ago, that nearly caused my life’s warranty to expire.

If I were to be on a long hike through the woods, my fear of snakes would weaken me. I wouldn’t be the strongest hiker and I wouldn’t enjoy my hike nearly as I could because I’d be looking left… right… front… back…. up… down… under…   Been there. Done that. Wore myself out.

I have pushed myself a few times with my fears to try to confront them.  I once came across a snake in the yard. My impulse was to run to the house, flinging my arms wildly and screaming like a banshee, but I made myself stand in place, mouth closed and arms by my side.  Mr. Slimy took off like a shot – more afraid of me than I was of him.  If he’d had arms, I’m certain he’d have waved them.

It was a small victory, but it made me feel a little stronger.  I also saw the movie “Snakes on a Plane” when it came out because I wanted to see if I could take it.  Again, it made me feel a little stronger than my fear.

Overcoming Fear

As John Selby wrote,  Fear is a contraction; acceptance is an expansion. Each moment we choose one or the other.  Each time we stand up to our fears, the stronger we grow. When we prove that we can look fear in the eye and not flinch (or run screaming), our fear weakens.

Whether your fear is public speaking, the dark, snakes (shudder), spiders, meeting new people, clowns, taking a chance on something (or someone),  vampires, or something so ridiculous you’d never even admit it out loud – don’t allow fear to have the upper hand.

The longer fear reigns supreme, the stronger it grows and the bigger it gets. However, if you’re able to take control, the weaker fear becomes and the smaller it shrinks.  Basically, fear can either weaken you or you can weaken fear.  We are capable of a lot more than we ever give ourselves credit for.  The problem is we never realize how much fight and endurance we have lying inside of us because its dormant so often.

Every now and then, intentionally step outside of your comfort zone and find out just what you’re made of.  You may be surprised!

Have a very happy and very safe Halloween!  I have A LOT of big plans for Self Help Daily in November, and then beyond that.  I’ll tell you all about them in tomorrow morning.

For now, there’s punch to be made….

~ Joi

Activate Your Abundance by Kim Caldwell

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Activate Your Abundance Remembering Your Power to Create What You Want - Kim Caldwell - Paperback

“Abundance is not something we acquire. It is something we tune into.” – Wayne Dyer

Whenever I’m in the middle of a great book, I always think of one of my favorite quotes, “Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body.”  I’m honestly not sure who originally said it, but I’m certain I’d love to sit down with them for an afternoon, drinking coffee and talking books.  Or tea, if they’re British. Tea… coffee… I go either way.

I recently told you about a great book by Kim Caldwell, How Green Smoothies Saved My Life (click the link for the review, if you missed it).  I just finished another book by Kim called Activate Your Abundance: Remembering Your Power to Create What You Want.

“Listen for the magic word of motivation and you will hear it. Then the sky is the limit.” – Norman Vincent Peale

I talk on a regular basis to a lot of authors and publishers about books and book reviews. One asked me a few years ago how I approached a book review. I told her that I let the book, itself, lead the way…. then I try very hard not to get IN the way.

Some books need to be guided along in a review – I’ll feel the need to explain certain concepts because they aren’t truly clear until you, yourself, have read the book.

However, with Activate Your Abundance, no guided tour is necessary.  I could honestly say something like, “This is the book that can serve as a spark plug to your self confidence and fuel to your success (in all the ways you define success).  Activate Your Abundance will act as a broom to sweep away the cobwebs of negativity in the corners of your mind and life.  If you want to release yesterday, embrace today, and improve tomorrow, make this the next book you read.“

That, and that alone, could be the review because it truly sums it up.  However, it doesn’t seem fair to sum up such a wonderful and potentially life-changing book with one paragraph.

Besides, we all know I am not a gal of few words.

From the Introduction of Activate Your Abundance:

One of the most important messages this book offers is how negative emotions become trapped in our body, creating disease and problems in our lives. Many of us have lived with these problems for years, unaware of the root cause. These include weight, relationship, health, and financial problems.  You are probably thinking, “If I need to lose weight, how will clearing negative thoughts help?”  Let me assure you that releasing these heavy emotions will lighten our load both mentally and physically.  I have found some of the best techniques available to heal and clear these negative emotions. I present them here to you with the knowing that they will make wonderful shifts in your consciousness if practiced consistently with an open mind.  The dividends for releasing these stuck negative emotions are endless. You will discover yourself in a new way as all your best qualities start to emerge. – Kim Caldwell

In Activate Your Abundance, you will experience a 44-Day program designed to help you get in touch with YOU and the world around you. Not the you that you think you should be, and not the world you think you should have.  The program strips away all the extras, along with all the negative cobwebs.  Some that you never even knew were hanging around!

“Always leave enough time in your life to do something that makes you happy, satisfied, even joyous.  That has more of an effect on economic well-being than any other factor.” – Paul Hawken

One of the things I love most about this very positive, up-lifting, and give-me-the-toothbrush-while-I-take-on-the-hounds-of-hell book is the fact that it’s all about ATTRACTING great things to you.   It’s about realizing that you are worthy of everything you dream of.  You are not chained by past mistakes or heartaches. No one and nothing is holding you back or in place.

I’ll confess, I did not take 44 days and treat this book as a day by day program.  I was only in “Day Two” when I realized that the “meat” in this book was too good to put the fork down!  I kept finding myself saying things like, “Oh, that’s good… Amen to that!” and “Where’s my pen, I have to write that down.“

Something else I told an author once was the fact that the hardest thing about writing book reviews is giving enough information without giving too much away.  Books aren’t just paper and bright covers. Books are experiences and the best experiences in life are those you don’t see coming.  To this book lover, giving too much away is like opening a Christmas present early, then wrapping it back up.  It takes the joy out of the whole thing.

Each “Day” is like a powerful devotion and gives you something to think about and work on. Each one is designed to chip away at negative forces in you and in your life. Some you would never have thought of on your own – I guarantee it.

How effective can it be to get rid of negativity?  Think of a cloudy, over-cast day.  When the dark clouds move out of the way, the sunshine feels brighter and more beautiful than ever, doesn’t it?! Think of negativity as dark clouds.  Activate Your Abundance can help clear the clouds out of your sky and leave you with brightness and beauty.

A final word about the sneaky effects of negativity:  Most people don’t realize they even have a problem with negative thoughts.  They think there’s some big mystery that explains why they aren’t happy, satisfied, or living up to their potential. They may blame other people, their circumstances, and even God.  They look everywhere except the place they should look!

The following illustration, I think, brings it all home.

I recently read about a woman’s diagnosis with Thyroid Disease. It made me think back to when my own thyroid went haywire.  I had no idea, whatsoever, what my problem was. I just knew I had a big one.   My hands were shaky and always sweaty.  Before holding one of my little girls’ hands, I’d always have to dry my hand off on something first.  I could just walk across the room and my pulse would jump up to 106 beats a minute. It felt like it was beating right out of my chest.

One night I was reading a book (knowing me, it was an Agatha Christie novel… I ALWAYS have one going) across from my husband in our den. I shook my head and put the book down.  He asked what was wrong and I told him the words weren’t words all of a sudden, they were just a bunch of letters that didn’t make any sense.  He, of course, looked alarmed.  I picked the book back up and they were words again.

I went to the doctor the next day.

This particular doctor didn’t catch my problem. He treated my asthma with his favorite medicines and told me not to read when I was overly tired.  I said, “Okay” out loud and added, “moron” under my breath.

The weird symptoms continued to pile up.  My weight dropped, I was thirsty 24-7, my brain was foggy, and my heart continued to race. My poor mom nearly worried herself silly and the only words my husband seemed capable of saying at the time was, “Call another doctor.”

I was a young mother of three very young and active little girls. I kept thinking, “I’m just extremely tired.” My dad was going through a nightmare with his own health, and I rationed away my problems as stress on top of exhaustion.

One day, my husband, our daughters, and I were in a nearby city around lunch time.  It was raining and he had to run into a store. I was (as always) SO thirsty.  I rolled my window down, wiped rain water off of the rear view mirror and put the water into my mouth… like four times in a row. The thought now makes me kind of sick, but I felt like I was about to die of thirst!

I went to another doctor the next day.

I think my mom suspected diabetes and I’m pretty sure my husband thought I had some sort of crazy, yet to be named disease with a grim outlook.  As for me, I didn’t know what it was but felt certain it was bad.

Even my doctor seemed overly concerned!

Turns out I had a ridiculously overactive thyroid that needed to be destroyed.  The hospital said they’d never seen one so out of whack – I took pride in that.  The hyperactive, crazy thyroid was dealt a final blow and I began taking a simple little pill every morning.  No biggy.

 The thing is, the solution and the cause were so simple! I kept getting worse because, honestly, I think I was kind of scared of what doctors would find because I felt SO bad.  Turns out the answer was quick, painless, and… in every way possible… gave me my life back.

I’m sure you see where I”m headed with this. Negativity is like an undiagnosed disease.  It’s victim will think the problem is something else.  Heck, they may be so scared that it’s something HUGE that they try to cover it up.  They know the cobwebs are on the window, but they throw curtains up over it.  Personally, I think a lot of people are scared that their problem is anxiety or depression.  Like me with my haywire thyroid, they’re certain the problem is bigger than it actually is.

You can deal negativity a fatal blow!  Your cure could be just a book away and the answer is quick, painless, and… in every way possible, will give you your life back.

See Activate Your Abundance: Remembering Your Power to Create What You Want for more information.

~ Joi

[toggle state=”open” title=”Accompanying Meditation Audios”] Go to www.togetherpublishing.com for meditation audios that accompany the book. [/toggle]

Driven to Distraction by Gnarly Gnats

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Perspective Quote
Most people list flies, mosquitoes, ants, bees, and spiders as their least favorite “pests.”  Spiders even pull double duty and find themselves high on lists of phobias.  I don’t understand that one, personally.  I kind of like the creepy little buggers.  I could watch one working on her web for hours. Such skill and showmanship.

I don’t really have anything against ants or bees either. In fact, I admire any species which answers to the queen.  I also approve of each group’s enthusiasm and work ethic.

As for flies and mosquitoes – I’ll admit, they can be pretty bothersome.  Worst picnic guests EVER.

However, you know where you stand with flies and mosquitoes. They aren’t as deceptive, underhanded, and vile as the pest that I call the worst of the bunch: GNATS. Seriously, is anything as annoying or as hard to get rid of as GNATS?

Our house is outside of the city limits. We’re, literally, surrounded by trees – many of which are apple or pear trees.  Normally, I’m crazy wild about this arrangement.  However, toward the end of summer, gnats can be a bit of a problem.  In the past, they’d make their presence known and I’d wipe out their population in no time flat. However, the army of gnats that attacked us this year have proven to be a very formidable opponent.

I wipe out one battalion and three more take their place.  You don’t see spiders or bees doing anything as hostile as that.

Many spider haters scream, “Thank God!” right about now.

It’s almost funny, isn’t it?  Sometimes we can stand up valiantly to the big things in life…. only to wind up in the corner shaking and crying over something extremely small.  Okay, maybe I didn’t cower and cry in a corner, but the gnats didn’t exactly bring out my best side.  I did, however…

  • ….ask God what He had in mind when he created gnats
  • ….threaten to chop down each fruit tree with an ax
  • ….wonder just how cold it is in Alaska
  • …. hurl a word that’s normally reserved for stubbed toes

Toward the end of summer, I came across something that worked like a charm for me.  I’m not talking about a magical potion to trap or kill gnats (although, with the research I’ve done, I could now write a book on the subject).  I’m talking about a little sanity preserver when things are  driving us all kinds of crazy.  When we’re stomping around, making a face so ugly it’d frighten small children, and reaching deep into our bag of four letter words for one that rises to the occasion.

Thanks to a colony of gnats that kept gathering around our outside cat’s water dish, one day I came across the best four letter word of all.

There I was, swatting like a woman possessed as our outside cats (Hannah and Fatima) took turns watching me, exchanging bewildered looks with one another. You know… the kind of crazed expressions all kids make behind their parent’s back.  I also noticed that our inside cat (Alexa, the diva) was watching me from the kitchen window.  If she had a “thought bubble,” it would have read “Poor thing’s finally snapped.”

She wouldn’t have been entirely wrong.  Angrily swatting through the air with my fly swatter I must have looked like a band leader on crack.

In the middle of great annoyance and anxiety, a reasonable inner voice finally spoke up:  “It’s just gnats.”

Yes. JUST gnats.  Somehow, the simple little word J-U-S-T calmed my psyche and made the world a more reasonable place again.  Instead of seeing tiny flying demons taunting me as they dodged my wrath with gracefulness I almost admired, I, once again, saw the beautiful world around me.  I didn’t hear my grumbling and mumbling any longer. I heard birds singing and the wind blowing through the leaves.

One word! And a four letter one, at that.  They have such a bad rep.

Later that same day, I had a plugin catastrophe on one of my blogs. It was a plugin I used frequently on that particular blog.  A beloved plugin on a beloved blog. I didn’t even have time to flinch.  The same inner voice who’d had so much success earlier in the day whispered, “It’s just a plugin.”

Does everything in life respond to the word just? No, of course not.  SHOULD we whip it out willy nilly in an attempt to be as care free as a hippie in the Seventies?  Oh, heck no. Think about the words, themselves: CARE FREE.  That means being free of care – and when is that ever an entirely good thing? We should care about the things and people around us.  However, we should always strive to stay in control.  If we CAN change something that needs to be changed, we should do everything in our power to do so.  The thing is, we have to keep the right perspective.

The next time you find yourself coming unraveled over something, ask yourself if it’s really worth the effort.  I think that’s why a lot of people stay on the brink of a nervous breakdown – they lack perspective. If they’d realize that they react to standing in line with the same level of rage they muster for a broken ankle, they’d  realize they need a little perspective.  That, and a new favorite four letter word.

Just a thought.

Make that JUST, a thought.

~ Joi

6 Reasons to Consider Veganism

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Koya Webb
Below is a guest post by the ridiculously beautiful Koya Webb. I remember the first time I saw a picture of Koya Webb. The article was discussing healthy diets and promoting healthy lifestyles.  When I saw Koya’s picture, I thought, “Just give me what she’s having.”

I know you’ll put aside all preconceived opinions about veganism and read the article with an open mind. It’s only when we have ALL the facts that we can make the healthiest decisions in life.  ~ Joi

Unveiling the Vegan Lifestyle: 6 Points to Ponder

by Koya Webb

Dietary veganism—the practice of abstaining from eating animal products—is a lifestyle rife with mystery, myths and misconceptions, and is often erroneously regarded as a dietary regime for extremists.  In fact, amid copious health and wellness benefits, the vegan diet is far more mainstream today. This is exemplified by the number of vegan restaurants, and vegan dishes at traditional restaurants, increasing exponentially as well as the high profile personalities that have adopted a vegan diet.

Perhaps the vegan diet officially “arrived” when Oprah Winfrey went on a vegan diet for 21 days in 2008, and in 2011 asked her 378 production staff to do the same for one week, as well reported*. Reports also note that Former U.S. president Bill Clinton adopted a vegan diet in 2010 after cardiac surgery, while his daughter Chelsea was already a vegan. In November 2010 Bloomberg Businessweek stated that a growing number of American CEOs were becoming vegan, such as Steve Wynn, Mortimer Zuckerman, and Russell Simmons. A list of other notable vegans can be found on Wikipedia.

Here are 6 “vegan revelations” to provide fundamental key facts and clarify misconceptions about the vegan diet and lifestyle*:

 

  1. Vegan food is flavorful! Most people think a vegan diet means tasteless food and poorly-disguised fake meat. While in the past this may have been true, vegan recipes have evolved and today there is a wealth of vegan fare bursting with flavor, from barbecue classics and chili to lasagna and other Italian favorites that are prepared with a heightened health factor since fresh vegetables, fruits nuts and seeds are often key ingredients.  Spices, herbs, sauces, fresh ingredients and inspired culinary vision have made the modern vegan diet quite tasty!
  2. It’s a fruit feast. Those trying to reduce dietary sugar are reluctant to eat a lot of fruit, but the vegan diet allows for as much fruit as you desire. If you minimize or eliminate the consumption of complex carbohydrates like bread, rice and pasta, which all break down to sugar, you can add more fruit to your diet—also beneficial since fruit also contains fiber and enzymes that help you maintain and regular functioning system, while the starchy carb counterparts can clog you up and slow your metabolism.
  3. Meaty matters. It’s been shown that releasing meat from your diet—as vegans do—can protect you from many degenerative diseases. Meat quality remains an issue in the marketplace, while issues of toxicity, contamination and excessive hormones and chemicals abound. Even if you happen to eat the best quality meat products when dining at home, fast food and other restaurants are generally not as discriminating.
  4. Eco-friendly epicure. The vegan lifestyle causes less environmental damage and consumes fewer resources. Organizations such as PETA point out that animal agriculture is linked to climate change, water pollution, land degradation, a decline in biodiversity, and that a commercially available animal-based diet uses more land, water, and energy than a strictly vegetarian one, as cited on Wikipedia. With this in mind, a striking report out of the University of Chicago found that switching from the standard American diet to a plant-based one reduces more greenhouse emissions per person per year over switching from standard sedan like a Toyota Camry to a hybrid Toyota Prius, proving that what you choose to eat could do more to offset greenhouse gas emissions than what you choose to drive. So, if you want to reduce your carbon footprint go vegan…even for just 10 days.
  5. Go ahead and indulge!  The vegan lifestyle is not about deprivation.You can still enjoy favorite treats like ice cream, cheesecake, and many other desserts. Of course, as with any wellness regime, those with a sweet tooth must still heed the calorie and fat consumption.
  6. Body benefits abound. The vegan diet tends to be higher in dietary fiber, magnesium, folic acid, vitamin C, vitamin E, iron, and phytochemicals, and lower in calories, saturated fat, and cholesterol. Eating vegan has proven to control allergies, PMS, and depression. This is helped, in part, by avoiding the hormones, antibiotics, and antidepressants among other chemicals found in meat products. The vegan lifestyle also promotes healthier hair, skin and nails since mineral absorption is optimized with an animal-free diet. And, it’s been well-reported that eating more fresh fruits and veggies reduces the risk of breast cancer, colon cancer, heart disease and other deadly conditions.

 

Sources:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Veganism
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_vegans
http://satyamag.com/feb07/eshel.html
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQDNTGYiSPg

Koya Webb
Koya Webb
Koya Webb is an internationally recognized holistic health and wellness expert, author, motivational speaker, and consultant who is helping revolutionize the vegan cuisine and holistic living landscape. Her book “Koya’s Kuisine: “Foods You Love That Love You Back!” helps individuals make positive lifestyle changes that maximize their ability to lose weight, increase energy, reverse life-threatening conditions, and experience optimal health and vitality through a fit, active lifestyle. Reach Koya online at www.koyawebb.com.

Find Vegan Books on Amazon!