Before we get to ways to bring about change in your life, let me encourage you to stay after it. The fact that you’re here reading a self help article on a self help blog about ways to change means you are setting out to better yourself, your world, and everyone in your world. Good for you! Before taking another step, I want you to look at the quote graphic above and read the brilliant words of Dr. Wayne Dyer: “If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”
If you begin to look at negative traits that haven’t yet hit the road out of Dodge differently, you’ll be able to kick them out of town sooner. Don’t look at them as huge mountains you have to overcome, look at them as small hills you simply have to drive over. Don’t focus on what hasn’t yet come to fruition, focus on what will come to fruition. Focus on your determination, your strength, and your courage.
You have a lot going for you – focus on the positives and the negatives won’t stand a chance. If you want to bring about change in your life, that’s exactly what you’ll do.
Commit to Change and It’ll Be Yours!
All of us – every single one of us – has at least one change we need to make in our lives. We know full well what change needs to take place, and we certainly know WHY we want it to come about. The WHY may be more money, better health, better relationships, or better organization. Whatever the details, the change will be one that we know will add happiness and harmony to our lives.
Seems simple enough, right? What person in his or her right mind wouldn’t do whatever needed to be done to bring more happiness into their lives?
Unfortunately, there’s a reason I wrote “Seems simple enough” rather than just “Simple enough.” Change is hard!
Funny, we always look at people around us and ask, “Why won’t ____ just change?” or “Why can’t ______ just give up smoking? He’s not even trying!” Yet, when it comes to ourselves we fully recognize just how difficult it is to change habits – many of which are the habits of a lifetime. Trying to develop a new, better habit while trying to ditch an old one is like trying to create a new bike path, while ignoring the one that’s already there.
It’s so easy to steer back to familiar territory, isn’t it… to follow the path we worked so long on creating. After all, the tires fit like a glove.
I wish there was an easy answer. If one existed, I’d be typing it out right now – happily letting my readers know the simple thing they needed to do to achieve all they wanted to achieve and to be all they wanted to be. I’ve given it a lot of thought and have done a great deal of reading and research (to say nothing of the trial and error approach I’ve had with my own habits!).
The best way to attain a positive change is to set a few small goals for yourself each day and work toward something larger. For example, if you’re seeking to better your career or even improve your mental health, applying for school online is one way you can make an improvement to your life. It takes little effort to make the first step and apply. Just go online and see if any of the available degrees line up with some of your interests or passions. If you’re accepted, you can even choose to take a small amount of classes based on what you’re comfortable with.
You will have taken the first step in creating a new, positive path and the benefits will be more than worth the effort.
This holds true for those of us who are looking to improve our health. The first step may involve buying a new health-oriented book by a trusted author in the field of health. A great author can give you the information and tools you need to take your first step to a healthier life.
Below are such books that have helped me, personally, and I recommend them 110 percent:
If you’re looking to curb a nasty temper, negative attitude, foul mouth, or any other habit or trait you’re tired of living with, I have one piece of advice… stop thinking about it! I’d better explain – I’m not saying to keep the habit, far from it. However, the more you focus on the negative, the deeper the groove becomes in your mind. If you keep on thinking, “I have got to get this temper under control,” for example, you are simply creating a deeper groove in your mind that says, I HAVE A BAD TEMPER. Instead, focus on the positive, the flip-side.
Begin saying things like…
- “I am becoming so easy-going and even-tempered.”
- “Why am I such an even-tempered person?!” (experts say that, whatever the reason, putting positive affirmations into the form of questions is even more powerful)
- “I stay calm, cool, and collected even when others lose their minds.”
Even if the statement isn’t completely true (yet!), keep saying it. What you’ll do is create an environment that encourages the change you’re looking for. You’ll soon BE the cool cucumber you’re telling yourself about.
I know I’m dangerously close to oversimplifying, but success really does come down to a single word: Commitment.
If we commit our mind, body, and soul to a one single, reasonable purpose – we won’t be able to fail. However, that commitment can’t come and go. We can’t be as strong as a lion on Monday just to morph into a kitten by Thursday. We have to be “roaring” with determination and commitment every day. It doesn’t matter if we’re battling a bad temper, our weight, an addiction, or procrastination – in order to come out on the winning end, we have to commit ourselves to the win.
Part of the solution lies in battling FOR something rather than just battling AGAINST something. Focus on the positive – how wonderful you’ll feel once you’re standing on the winning side, how proud everyone who loves you will be of you, and how you’ll be in a position, then, to help others.
Commit yourself fully to the change you want to bring about and you’ll leave your habits with only one choice: To come around to your way of thinking.
~ Joi (“Joy”)
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