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Joi

A Baseball Adage Worth it’s Weight in Gold

November 5, 2006 by Joi 1 Comment

I’m still somewhere over the moon over my beloved St. Louis Cardinals winning the World Series.  It’s such a complete surprise – not because I didn’t expect it from the team.  You gotta love the chances of a team with Albert Pujols, Jim Edmunds, Scott Rolen, Chris Carpenter, and MVP David Eckstein.  Especially when they’re coached by a baseball guru like Tony La Russa.

No, I’m totally surprised because of the year I’d been having – I never expected or hoped for anything good to come out of it…. I didn’t think it was capable of anything right or good.  It’s just been one of those One D—… years – you know, one d— thing after another.  Forgive my language – I’m not a cusser except for the most extreme of circumstances, but some years beg for it.

This one did.

So how had 2006 been treating me? My mom moved on to Heaven without asking me (guess she knew what my answer would have been), we had a few shake-ups and near melt-downs in our home businesses, we lost two beloved cats, another one went missing for nearly a week, my van decided running wasn’t in its best interest, the dryer thought that looked like a sweet idea and followed the van’s lead, then – of course – there are the crazy little things that happen on the norm. The type of things you come to expect when you have a large family.

And a year without a sense of humor.

Last night – after the pit bull incident – I figured it out.  Life has simply forgotten how to be reasonable!  And a quick look at the news lets me know that it isn’t just my life – it’s life in general.  So if any of us look around for or long for that thing called normal, we’ll be sorely disappointed.

We’d be twice as likely to find the Easter Bunny.

I’ve been reading an amazing book by Buzz Bissinger.  It’s called Three Nights in August: Strategy, Heartbreak, and Joy Inside the Mind of a Manager and it’s about the guru I mentioned earlier, Tony La Russa.  Kind of takes place inside his mind.  It’s a great, great book and I’d say so even if I didn’t bleed St. Louis Cardinal red.

At one point, Coach La Russa is talking about his line-up.  Due to a torn hamstring, the Cardinal’s gold glove winning Fernando Vina was sidelined for months. The Cards had to call up a young man named Bo Hart.  He filled in and did his best – his “heart” made Hart a fan favorite.  But he wasn’t Vina…. he was, well, far from it.

At the time the book was written, the Cards had an upcoming series with their rival, the Chicago Cubs.  The Cubbies had a really strong team led by Sammy Sosa who was still at the top of his game.

La Russa knew that Vina’s absence in the line-up, and on the field, was going to hurt.  Hart had no shortage of heart and determination, but he did lack Vina’s talent and experience. Which could be said of a lot of players. Vina was one of the best second basemen to ever play.

In one of the more telling paragraphs of the book, a lesson was given to all of us:

“….it’s another La Russa adage that you can’t dwell on what you don’t have and can take advantage of only what you do have, so Hart is starting and batting second.”

Spoken like a champion.

After the final game, as the celebration was taking part on screen and in our living room, I realized something pretty cool.  After my dad passed away, his favorite team in the world (and one of his reasons for getting out of bed in the mornings) the UK Wildcats won the championship the following season. I got my ridiculously HUGE love for the UK Wildcats from my dad and I know he would have been crying tears of joy just as I was.

My mom loved the Cardinal’s and she knew baseball terminology inside and out – she knew all the players and had a really good idea about their averages.  She also had a pretty healthy crush on Rolen.  And just like my dad, her beloved team won the very first season she was in Heaven.

And just like I did with my dad, I got to thinking, “What a shame she isn’t here to see it…”  – only to realize she had the best seat in the world.

Life goes on, doesn’t it? “You can’t dwell on what you don’t have… and can only take advantage of what you do have.”

Golden, Coach. Golden.

3 Nights in August

Filed Under: Book Reviews, Books I Love, Positive Thought, Self Help Tagged With: baseball, inspiration, inspirational quotes

A Wild Saturday Night

October 29, 2006 by Joi 2 Comments

Bo the next day!
I know you’ve heard the phrase never a dull moment – well now you get to meet the person whose life it was coined for.

Last night this 5’2″ mother of three chased, wrestled and rolled with a pit bull. My body hurts. I wasn’t cut out for this sort of thing.  I had the first asthma attack I’d had in years and a few of my cats have post traumatic stress syndrome.

I’m a cooking in the kitchen, hanging out at the coffee shop kind of gal – decidedly not a pit bull tamer.

The dog in question – (during the ruckus I named him “Dang Dog!”) – somehow found our very quiet, fence-enclosed bird, raccoon, possum, rabbit, cat and deaf dog (little Wednesday‘s hearing isn’t what it once was) sanctuary. Normally, it’s just the 5 of us humans, a small, almost totally deaf and nearsighted, older dog and five precious cats. We have plenty of wildlife visitors but DangDog! was particularly interested in the cats.

It’s puzzling how he even got back here. We live on the outskirts of town, behind a business that’s protected by a metal, password-protected gate. He either knew the code or has discovered a LARGE hole in one of the fences.  Or he can fly.

We first saw him when a few of my girls and I got back from the store. Wednesday (our little dog) came out of the garage, par usual, to greet us. Then something par unusual happened – out came a large, muscular dog behind him. None of the cats were around at the time – and D.D. really didn’t seem interested in causing problems for Wednesday….until my smart little boy growled up at him. The pit bull wasn’t too happy about that. He was, however, happy about me – he wanted to be my best friend.

He kept standing up with his paws on my shoulders licking my face. Fortunately, of all the things I’m scared of, dogs aren’t one of them. He was a sweetheart to me and never posed a danger at all (to me).  I’m the biggest animal lover in the world and I think animals pick up on that.

But, like I said, we have 5 cats and a much smaller, disadvantaged dog, so my oldest daughter and I lured him away – on the other side of the mechanical gate. I took a package of hot dogs for him which he ate before we even got out of our driveway.

Big ol’ mouth.

I couldn’t help noticing that mouth. I finally got him on one side of the gate and me on the other…which took some doing because he was convinced that he was my dog and I was his… I dunno…. mom?

After a while, when I looked way up at the main gate, I didn’t see him – so I thought “Good, he went home.” I wanted more than anything for him to get somewhere safe – I felt for sure he was someone’s dog. He was the picture of health and wasn’t the least bit afraid of anything.  Or anyone.

So, much later I’m out in the yard in the pitch black darkness – putting Wednesday’s sweater back on him, fresh from being washed in Woolite.

I have some lovely pink pajamas and pink fuzzy house-shoes on – just in case you’re trying to picture the scene – there’s lots of pink.

I saw our smallest cat, Alexa (she was an outdoor cat at the time) in the driveway and was I walking toward her to oooh and ahhhh, tell her how beautiful she is…you know that sort of thing. Then, out of nowhere Dang Dog! comes flying at Alexa (this is where I name him) and like a scene from a nature show… or a nightmare…. he chases her, snapping at her tail. Of course, I’m running after them, in pink fuzzy house-shoes that really sort of “complete” the picture, through the wet, cold yard –  screaming his new name, which he refuses to answer to.

Off come the fuzzy shoes and my bare feet meet the cold wet ground.

I launch onto the dog’s back and down we go.  Alexa takes flight up a tree, reasoning that she still has 8 lives left.  D.D! starts licking my face – it at least lets me know I’m still alive. By now, my asthma’s pretty angry and breathing isn’t coming easily. I put my arms around his neck and try to convince him to let me help him along – to my van. I figure I’ll drive to every house within a mile and ask if they’re missing a large, cat chasing bundle of strength.

Man was this dog strong.

Just as we’re edging along in the dark, with Alexa watching from on high – another of our youngest cats, Bo,  thinks it’s the perfect time to come creeping over to see what all the fuss is about. He sees Double D at the same time Double D sees him….and wer’e off again!

Once again, the dog is right on the home team’s butt….once again I dive onto the dog’s butt and Bo propels himself up yet another tree. Thankfully, God’s a cat lover and we live in a yard with lots of trees. Bo scampers up a tree and I just lay there with everything I have TO wrap wrapped around this crazy dog.

By now, I’m totally amazed that this dog hasn’t eaten my face off yet.  He just kept licking it – and doing the paws on the shoulder thing that really didn’t amuse me much anymore. Fortunately, my husband heard the yelling from inside the house and came out to help. We put him (the dog, not the husband) into the van and off we went to find his home.

Bo and Alexa are pretty jumpy today, and I can hardly move.  Seriously, every bone in my body hurts. The knees and elbows are understandable – crashing onto a hard cold ground will do that.  The back is understandable, too, since this was a very heavy and strong dog.  But my chin?!  I don’t even remember hitting it.  Oh, well. My babies are all okay and the dog’s safe. He has quite a story to tell about a crazy cat lady with coffee on her breath and pink house-shoes.

The picture at the top of the post is Bo looking up at the tree that saved his life.  He’s nothing if not dramatic.  Alexa’s eyes seem fixed in a wide stare.  She jumps at every little sound – convinced that evil’s lurking behind each tree.  My little buddy Wednesday doesn’t seem to know anything went on – he’s pretty much in his own little. oblivious world. But I’ve given him strict orders, no more entertaining friends while were away.

Filed Under: Animal Protection, General Tagged With: cats, dogs, pets, stories

Keep Going: Because Stopping Isn’t Always an Option

April 13, 2006 by Joi Leave a Comment

Life is like riding a bicycle you dont fall off unless you stop pedaling. - Claude Pepper
“Life is like riding a bicycle. You don’t fall off unless you plan to stop peddling.” – Claude Pepper

While pilfering through my quotes for today’s quote of the day, I knew I struck inspirational gold when I came across this one by Claude Pepper.  Mr. Pepper was a Harvard Law school graduate, taught law, practiced law in Miami Beach, Coral Gables, and Tallahassee, Fla., as well as in Washington, D.C. .  He capped it all off by serving as a Senator and Representative from the beautiful state of Florida.

He’s the sort of person who, when speaking, the rest of us would do well to lean in and listen.

I’m leaning.

I’ve never thought about life in terms of riding a bicycle, but I’ll be danged if he isn’t right.  If you’ve ever taught a child to ride a bike, you know that all is usually fine until they stop peddaling, for whatever reason.  It’s pretty much the same with swimming – if you stop treading or kicking, there’s no place left to go but down.

As an adult (I’m not sure I EVER actually got tired as a child), there’ve been times on a bike that every muscle in my body wanted to just stop.  My legs will begin pleading with my brain… stop, for crying out loud, we can’t go any further!  But my brain somehow musters up the energy and ability to reason to reply, “If I stop, we go down… is that what you want?!”

We all trudge on until we make it safely to the carport and THEN safely stop.

Sometimes “keeping on” is simply a response to being unable to stop.

Sometimes it’s the same with life, isn’t it?  Even when we’re tired….even when we’re broken-hearted or our spirit has been stripped bare….even when we’re sick – we have to dig deep and find a way to keep going.  Because if we stop, we’re going to drop and, unlike cats, we don’t always land on our feet.

The dread, the descent, the deterioration, the drop, and the downfall can all be found in the same place – the very spot you discontinue.

Just keep on going.  It really doesn’t matter if you feel like it or not. Find a way, make a way – and if that way lets you down, find another.  When dog-tired, on a bicycle, I think of it as “finding a new gear.”  I think the same can pretty much be applied to life.

If the one you’re in is failing you… find a new gear.  Then keep going.

Filed Under: Self Help

Beautiful Definition of Success

April 8, 2006 by Joi 1 Comment

To laugh often and much;
To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children;
To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;
To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others;
To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;
To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.
This is to have succeeded.

This is often attributed to one of my favorite authors, Ralph Waldo Emerson.  In fact, in my own collection of quotes and poems, I had it in his folder.  But I recently read that it is actually an adaptation of a poem published in 1905 by Bessie Stanley. No version of it has ever been found in Emerson’s writings.

At any rate, it is an absolutely beautiful assessment of what success truly is and I love it muchly.

 

Filed Under: General, Self Help

Time Management Tips That Actually Make Sense

March 30, 2006 by Joi 4 Comments

Time Management: Why It Matters

If there’s one thing people talk about, maybe, even more than the weather it’s time.  More specifically, how we don’t have enough of it, how we wonder where it “flies” off to, and how in the world we can get all that we need to do DONE in the amount of time we have.

It’s not a case of creating more time, however (even if we could!).  What we should be focusing on is spending the time we have wisely – not wasting time on activities or even thoughts that won’t carry us forward.

Effective time management will do more than just lead us to a more successful life, it’ll GREATLY reduce the amount of stress in our lives.  A great deal of stress comes from thinks that are UN-finished and UN-done.  When we find a way to effectively manage our time, we’ll get more things done and have fewer reasons to stress.

What’s more, as we accomplish more, our self confidence will grow and, before you know it, we’re practically unstoppable!

But, before we get ahead of ourselves, we have to confront how we manage our time… or if we even do. Right up front, it’ll help to realize one very important thing:  Gandhi, Abraham Lincoln, Martin Luther King, Jr, Harriet Tubman, Eleanor Roosevelt, Booker T. Washington, Benjamin Franklin, Mother Teresa, and Marie Curie EACH had the same number of hours in their day that we have.  EACH had the same number of days in their week  and the same number of days in their year as we have.

And look at what they did with it!

These people, and countless other giants, knew one of the greatest secrets of all:  If you waste time, you waste your life. Pure and simple.

Many people will argue that it’s harder to focus on work in the time we live in.  They’ll argue that with technology, television, video games, dvds, and so forth – there are simply too many distractions.  They’ll even try to make you believe that people such as Lincoln and Washington had an advantage – fewer things to distract them from their work.  Nonsense!  I agree, there are tons of distractions and many of them are the biggest wastes of time ever known to man.

However, we have far more advantages today than the men and women who lived before us had.  We have washers, dryers, Kroger, automobiles, e-mail, computers, refrigerators, Starbucks, top-notch eyeglasses, the best doctors, and the list goes on.  We may have DISTRACTIONS but they had extreme DISADVANTAGES. Yet they persevered.   A lot of it had to do with determination and character – traits that, in my opinion, they’d still possess if they lived amongst us today.

How can you improve your time management skills and, thereby, improve your quality of life?

Below are time management tips that can help you get on track and stay on track.

  • Plan each day. If you’ve never been a fan of to-do lists, please give them a shot.  I can’t even remember a time when I didn’t use to-do lists.  They help to round up and organize your thoughts and goals.  Write the most important things at the top and tackle those first.  This way, if the unexpected comes up, the most important things have been done.This prioritizing will help you take care of both the most important things on your to-do list as well as those things that aren’t quite as important.
  • Don’t waste time – not even an hour. When you sit down to watch a television show that you’re only watching because it’s on (admit it, we’ve all done it), ask yourself, “What could I accomplish in these 60 minutes instead?”  If you’re a writer, depending upon your medium, you could write 3 blog posts, an entire chapter, or a couple of articles.
  • Delegate. I have to admit, I’m not a huge fan of delegating.  I don’t know why – maybe because I was an only child. I was just always accustomed to doing it myself, if it were within my powers and abilities.  However, if you have children to help with housework, or co-workers to help with a task – utilize them.  It’s far better than taking on so much, yourself, that you turn into a first class grouch.
  • Focus on each task. If you don’t take the time to “get it right” the first time, you’re only going to have to re-do it… which is one of the largest time wasters ever.  Allot enough time for each task to do a great job, not just a good job.  Having said that…
  • Don’t obsess over details! Wasting time trying to achieve perfection simply wastes time, frustrates you, and keeps you from getting more accomplished.
  • Break large, time-consuming tasks into smaller tasks. If there’s an especially large task you have before you, break it down.  Work in “chunks” – piecing the puzzle together until it’s a work of art.
  • Embrace the 10-minute rule. It’s a beauty!  You work on a  task that you’ve been putting off or dreading for a good, straight 10 minutes. More often than not, once you’ve started, you’ll finish.  Then it’s over and done with, never to haunt your good spirits again.
  • Evaluate how you’re spending your time. In The Skinny on Time Management by Jim Randel (the link leads to my review of this outstanding book), Randel calls Self-Awareness the Sine Qua Non – in his words “You can’t go anywhere with time management until you are aware of how you are spending your time.”  He goes on to recommend keeping a “time journal” for a week or so.  The goal is to see where you may be wasting time – then you can do a little brainstorming and find how you could utilize this time better.  For example, if you find that you spent 2 hours watching a baseball game (a favorite pastime of mine that I wouldn’t even dream of giving up), use that time to work out as you watch your favorite team.  If you do your pilates, weight lifting, yoga, or even aerobics (running in place, calisthenics, etc.) during the time you’re watching a game or television show, you’ll free up the time during the day when you’d normally work out.   You might also consider ironing, cleaning, writing, checking your e-mail, engaging in social media, or any number of other activities.
  • Limit distractions whenever possible. Set aside specific time for specific projects and cut off all potential distractions.  As a mother of three daughters and 5 cats, and the wife of a busy bee husband – I don’t distract easily.  I can write, code, or do any other tasks while carrying on 4 conversations, petting a cat, and cooking supper.  Necessity breeds the ability to find a way to do far more than one ever thought and since children and husbands don’t come with PAUSE buttons, I’ve learned to just keep on keeping on.  However, most people haven’t had to develop this knack and they can (and do) get distracted easily. Simply cut out and cut off any distractions that you may have while working on your to-do list.
  • Adopt a healthy lifestyle. Get plenty of sleep, have a healthy diet and exercise regularly.  It may sound like I just segued into a fitness or health article but, a healthy lifestyle can improve your focus and your ability to concentrate.  These traits can help you get more done in less time.
  • When you need a break, take a break! If you allow yourself to get stressed and burned out, you will undo all the good that you’ve done.  Remember, you aren’t a machine!  When you feel like you need a break – even a mini-vacation – take one.  A little while back, I felt like I couldn’t write another word, type out another recipe on my food blog, install another plugin, or customize another theme.  I wanted to cringe when I thought of words that normally excited me:  Plugins, blog, search engine optimization, courting Google, affiliate programs, e-mail, and so on.  I LITERALLY pushed myself away from the computer and didn’t return until a couple of days later.  In that time, I caught up on a few books, gardened, worked on the bird stations in our yard, and played with cats. Can you say MENTAL VACATION!?!?!  I returned to my work refreshed and invigorated. I know it’s not always possible for those who don’t work at home… those who have to answer to someone other than their cat.  But, when possible, take a little time away – not just partially away… completely away.  When you return, you’ll be a ninja!

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

P.S. Thank you, thank you, thank you for the sweet e-mails concerning the loss of my mother.

It was a terrible loss that just fell from the sky – she was far too young to die and it was a terrible shock.  But I’d compound the tragedy, and make her as mad as a hornet on a July morning (in case you aren’t from the South, that means DANG mad) if I didn’t try to get on with my life.

And this would be me trying to do just that. With a heavy heart and overwhelming sense of loss – but trying the best I know how.

Filed Under: Must Reads, Self Help, Time Management Tagged With: time management, time management tips

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