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Animal Protection

The Senselessness of Dove Hunting Gives Me a Headache

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Dove

Seriously. Why do people hunt doves?  Why would anyone deliberately… for the sport of it… want to intentionally destroy something so completely innocent and helpless? Why want to take anything beautiful out of the world? Shouldn’t we want to bring more beauty INTO the world and work to KEEP the beautiful things around us. I just can’t wrap my head around getting all suited up, grabbing weapons of destruction and pain and heading off in pursuit of killing something.

Three mornings ago, I noticed  how full our front yard was with doves. There were quite a few cardinals, as always, but the beautiful symbol of peace seemed to be everywhere – enjoying the seeds, the crumbs, the scenery.  I grabbed a cup of coffee, went outside and just enjoyed the show. Since then, however, the fields surrounding our house have been full of gunfire – hunters blasting away at the silence and serenity. Not only do the trees (and yard) seem barren, we can’t even sit outside and enjoy nature.

It sounds like we’re on a Civil War battlefield.

Anyone who reads any of my blogs knows that every now and again, I let off a little steam – usually aimed at people who are bringing harm to children or animals. Eh, this is another instance of the steam and another instance of me trying to wrap my head around something that seems completely and utterly senseless.

Wolves, doves, bears… why hunt and kill anything you aren’t going to even eat? For crying out loud, take up golf or bowling. Play Madden Football. You know, something that doesn’t involve the loss of a life.

Rant over.  Steam released.

Angel Animals – Book of Inspiration by Allen and Linda Anderson

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Angel Animals Book of Inspiration by Allen and Linda Anderson

I just finished a book that can only be described as completely beautiful and precious. I’m sure you’ve guessed by now that I’m all kinds of animal obsessed. So much so that the term animal lover just doesn’t seem to cover it. We have 3 cats (plus a few strays that I’ve already named, but can’t quite touch yet), 3 hamsters, and a host of cuties that come into our yard each day and night. Yes, as a matter of fact, I do name our possums, rabbits, and raccoons. You have not seen cute until you’ve seen a raccoon with a bunch of grapes!

We currently have 4 bird feeders and I’d name my feathered friends as well, but they number in the gazillions.  Besides I don’t have to call them for them to flock to me.  All it takes is the rattling of bird seed, a bag of popcorn, or a loaf of bread.

Our dog, sadly, passed away over a year ago and we haven’t gotten another one yet. I’m working on my husband as well as our outside cats. None are budging, yet, but if the hubby remembers how much he loved walking Wednesday, at least he may reconsider.

Anyway, a few of my favorite authors are also animal lovers extraordinaire: Allen and Linda Anderson. This book is their latest: Angel Animals Book of Inspiration: Divine Messengers of Wisdom and Compassion.  It’s also probably my favorite book of theirs.

A few days ago, I posted about one of the stories in this wonderful book on my Dream Blog, click the link to read it – the story is about an iguana (oooh, I’ve never had one of those).  The story is very interesting.

This beautiful book is available on Amazon for just a little over $10 – are you kidding me?! You could buy one for every animal lover you know and have birthday, Father’s Day, and Christmas gifts that will make them smile ear to proverbial ear.

Angel Animals Book of Inspiration: Divine Messengers of Wisdom and Compassion is a collection of true stories by animal lovers – all about the remarkable animals that have touched their lives.

These are animals that’ll make you smile, laugh, and sometimes even cry. As they’re moving your emotions and stirring your heart, they’ll also inspire you and touch you in a way that you’ll want to share with others. I’ve already shared a few stories with my daughters and their boyfriends. When it comes to animal lovers, my youngest daughter’s boyfriend is a kindred spirit. When they first started dating, there was a big snake on our patio, completely uninvited. That’s where this animal lover draws the DO NOT CROSS line. When this young man saw the snake, his face lit up. When most people would have tried to kill the animal, he took the time to catch it and take it to a field to release it safely. He even talked sweetly to it the entire time – the way I talk to animals with fur and feathers. If I’m not mistaken, he called it baby once.

A sentiment I couldn’t get entirely behind, but I knew the kid was a soul mate.

You’ll want to share these beautiful stories with all of the animal lovers in your life – even the snake handlers.

“As a lifelong animal lover, I am delighted to see them celebrated in such a positive way. You and your pet will enjoy reading this together.” – Betty White

Some of the animals you’ll fall in love with are:
Richard Simmons’ beautiful Dalmations
A Llama with wings!
Cassidy the blue eyed cat
The Dolphin who loved the song “Amazing Grace”
Jasper, a neglected cat who was fortunate enough to be adopted by very sweet and loving parents
And too many more to even list… including, of course, the iguana I mentioned above.

The stories in Angel Animals Book of Inspiration: Divine Messengers of Wisdom and Compassion made me think more about the animals in my own life – how they’ve helped us through hard times and how they’ve touched us in ways we didn’t think possible.

One instance that comes to mind involves my mother. Right after my dad passed away, their beautiful lab had to be put to sleep. What was a heartbreaking time for all of us was about as close to unbearable as possible for my mother. Mom, was also an extreme animal lover, understandably was going through an extremely hard time. One afternoon, she looked out her front door and saw an adorable, frisky, white, little dog staring back at her – wagging his tail so much that it nearly knocked him down! Naturally, she brought him inside. She contacted the local radio stations and put up a few “missing dog” posters. Deep down, I somehow knew that an “owner” wouldn’t show up. I knew the owner was her – because, frankly, I’ve seen God work before and am familiar with His style.

I’ve known many, many dogs in my life but I can honestly say that this dog had the sweetest nature of any dog I’ve ever met. He was simply a joy to be around. He was playful, loving, sweet, and possessed an incredible sense of humor. As all pet lovers know, all animals have different levels of humor. This little dog was a riot and seemed to love NOTHING more than making our mom laugh.

Like I said, I’m familiar with God’s style.

Please grab at least one copy of this book, it won’t just touch your heart, it’ll gently squeeze it.

Coping With Empty Nest Syndrome

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Hanging Geraniums
My e-mail’s inbox has been an extremely exciting place lately. It seems that just about everyone has something on his or her mind.

I get a lot of e-mails requesting recipes (through my food blog), advice on caring for an older pet (from people who know we have a 8,548 year old cat named Prissy!), and requests for particular articles, tips, etc.  If you’re one of the ones who e-mails me, keep it up!  I love, love, love hearing from you.  Even the man who suggested that coffee isn’t healthy and that I probably drink too much of it.

I told him I just didn’t need that kind of negativity in my life and that I was praying for him.  I explained, of course that I was just kidding… about the first part, anyway.

I’ve gotten several e-mails lately dealing with Empty Nest Syndrome.   Thanks be to God I don’t have to deal with that one yet.  I actually have a very full nest and cherish every second.  Not only are all three of our daughters still at home – most of the time, their boyfriends are here as well.  With that many young people around, who needs television? !

However, a few nights ago, I did get a little taste of what an empty next would be like.  My husband and all three girls and sons-I-never-had were out.  One daughter was working, my husband was out of town, and the rest were exploring haunted houses in a nearby town.  The house was so frightfully quiet, my cats and I didn’t know what to do with ourselves.  I opted to clean, and the cats went the curl up and sleep route.

Something occurs to me – quiet is alien to me.  If I had a magic wand, I’d make our home filled with young people 24/7.

I know that if I hear from several people who are dealing with an issue, many more are out there dealing with the same problem.  So I thought I’d post my advice here – such as it is, in the humble hopes that maybe someone can find a little comfort or, at least, some coping advice they can put to use.

First of all, change how you think about the situation.

So many parents refer to this time as a “loss.”  It may sound extreme, and I’m sorry if it sounds harsh, but the only parent who can truly claim a “loss” is the parent who has lost a child.  If your child is living, you haven’t lost anything!  Admittedly, it’s a transition, a big one.  As I said, my girls are still at home, but I certainly feel the transition.  As they grow older, you’re no longer the center of their world.  That certainly wouldn’t be normal, would it?!  I don’t have ready “co-pilots” for trips to the store or McDonald’s like I once did.  The trip’s a solo flight most of the time.  I haven’t LOST my girls, though.  I know where they are.

Life is full of transitions – and usually they’re transitions we’re certain (at the time) that we’ll never weather.  Moving away from home and dealing with homesickness, losing a house, saying goodbye to a loved one, etc.  Somehow, we come through transitions time after time.  The trick is to keep plowing along and to fight.  Never give in to emotions or lose yourself in a sea of sadness.

Don’t get me wrong, you’ll have sad moments.  That’s perfectly understandable and you needn’t apologize for your feelings to anyone.  Mothers have emotions that no one on earth can even come close to understanding. Someone once said that a mother is only as happy as her saddest child.

Must have been a mother who said it.

We also have a little nastiness known as hormones (Hello, Menopause) – and, as luck would have it, right around the time it hits us that our babies aren’t completely babies anymore is the time our hormones aren’t completely reasonable anymore. They don’t exactly lessen the blow, do they? In fact, they cause each blow to feel 12 times worse. Not. Good.

Add to that the fact that ALAO around this time, a lot of us are dealing with troubling situations with our own parents. For those fortunate enough to still have their parents living, whole new worries and concerns can arise.

An individual doesn’t have a midlife crisis – midlife is a crisis.

To get a “feel” for what many parents go through during this transitional time, I’ve researched message boards, blogs, magazine articles, and, frankly, my own inbox.  It didn’t take long to realize that the first thing parents need to do is change the way they look at it.  I read so many comments like, “It doesn’t get better…” and “I just keep waiting for the phone to ring..” etc.

Oh, snap!

It WILL get better if you allow it to – and watching for the phone to ring isn’t a good example of allowing it to.  That’s a good example of wallowing.  Anyone watching for the phone to ring, watching for a car in the driveway, or putting their life on PAUSE for any reason whatsoever needs to snap out of it right away.

Life is too precious to put it on  hold.

What you want to do is to create an environment where your child(ren) will want to come back and visit.  You DON’T want to create an environment of guilt trips and sadness.  They’ll avoid that like a teenage boy avoids showers.

Be happy, be encouraging, be upbeat.  Be someone they’ll want to be around, not someone they feel like they HAVE to be around.

Stop thinking of anything as “empty,” whether it’s your house, car, or life.  If we dwell on negative words and thoughts, we’ll only be making ourselves miserable.  Empty is a negative word – replace it with “peaceful,” “calm,” or “relaxed.”  MAKE yourself bury the negative thoughts in the back yard and vow to never dig them up again.

On the night I mentioned above, the first word that popped into my head after about 5 minutes was QUIET.  As a mom of 3 lively girls and the wife of 1 lively husband – quiet was quite new to me.  I’ll be honest… I din’t much care for it at first.

I turned on a Golden Girls marathon and the “quiet” was soon filled with Rose, Blanche, Sophia, Dorothy, and the sound of my own laughter mixed with my popcorn chewing.

I had my own little party and shhhh, don’t tell anyone… it was awesome! You know how, with kids and husbands around, it seems like you only get to actually see bits and pieces of television shows?  My funny bone and I feasted on about 10!

If you can’t embrace the stillness and quiet and enjoy them as “peaceful” and “tranquil,” then do what I did… make your own noise.

Second of All, Examine How You View Life

Don’t make your children (or spouse for that matter) your only reason for being alive.  If you do, then you just may be right when you say, “it’ll never get better.”  If you don’t have any interests outside of your children, please take care of that problem (and it’s a beaut of a problem) before the day’s out.

Below are just a few ideas:

  • Start a personal blog.  Not only does it give you a creative outlet, it’s a cool way to let others know what you’re up to.  Blogger.com gives you all you need to start blogging within an hour of hitting their site.   Personally, I wouldn’t advise using Blogger.com for a business blog, but for a personal blog?  Why not?
  • Start a new flower bed. Having a hobby like gardening isn’t just FUN, it’s great exercise. Fresh air, exercise, fun… plus the reward of gorgeous flowers when all’s said and done. I love flower (and herb) gardening. I am the queen of geraniums (pictured above) and herbs and don’t mind patting myself on the back with a dirt covered hand that smells like rosemary. Fill your life with as many things as you can that make you excited and happy. Growing your own flowers, herbs, and vegetables is just so darn rewarding.
  • Get involved in social media. If you aren’t already on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Pinterest, hop in. The water’s fine!
  • Adopt a pet!  Cats, dogs, birds, etc. – they’re nothing if not babies.  They’re also a great, great deal of company, enjoyment, entertainment, and an endless source of love. Furry babies (or feathered, for that matter) keep a lot of people sane and fill a void that needs to be filled.
  • Redecorate your home. Use your extra time and money to totally re-do at least one room of your home.  After that’s done, move to the next room.
  • Take a vacation. Grab a camera and take off for someplace you’ve always wanted to see.
  • Read more. Choose a great author (my own favorites are Agatha Christie, Dean Koontz, Nicholas Sparks, William Shakespeare, John Grisham..) and make it your mission to read every book they’ve written. I ALWAYS have an Agatha Christie mystery “going” – I read and re-read her mysteries. Great stuff.
  • Become a Collector.  Begin collecting antiques, jewelry, dishes.. Whatever interests you.  It’s a great deal of fun to hit up antique shops, thrift stores and even yard sales.  I’ve been a collector practically all my life – cookbooks, brass candlesticks, coffee mugs, books, dvds, antique dishes, Liberty Falls houses and figurines, bracelets, earrings, purses…  It turns everything from ebay to weekend excursions into treasure hunts.
  • Watch movies!  This is just a fun suggestion – you won’t benefit in any way, I suppose, except for having a good time.  Like the “author suggestion,” above, I’ve always liked to take a certain actor or actress and watch everything they’ve been in.  At my husband’s choosing, we’ve been watching everything Vin Diesel lately.  They’ve actually been fun.
  • Begin a healthy routine.   Start exercising with dvds, walking at the mall, playing tennis, walking your dog, etc.  You’ll be doing something healthy for yourself plus activity releases endorphins, those delicious little feel good vibes that make you happy to be alive.
  • Take up cooking. It’s one of my own favorite things to do in the world.  There’s nothing like going to the grocery store, loading up on ingredients, bringing them home, and making great things happen in the kitchen.  Of course, it’s all the sweeter if you throw in a Starbucks trip between the reaping and sowing.
  • Ask for a little help. During the early part of the transition, be frank and honest with your spouse and other people in your life.  Tell them that you fully expect to be a “pill” for a month or two and would greatly appreciate a little help with keeping a smile in place.  Your spouse could make a special point of coming home for lunch more often – or maybe meeting you for lunch.

Realize that You’re Still Loved and Needed More Than Ever Before!

To realize this, you need to do little more than to think back to when you left home. You missed your parents terribly and probably even felt closer to them than ever before. I know it was true for me. I came to look forward to visits with my mom and dad more than ever.

Thinking back will also cause you to realize you needed them more than ever before as well. I constantly needed something from them – whether it was advice on pruning roses, making gravy without lumps, or what in thunder to do with a corned beef my new husband had just brought home. I burned up the phone lines! I can remember “hearing” their smiles each time I called with another emergency.

I SO totally understand that now.

Finally, Look Beyond Your Nest and Make a Difference.

I saved this one for last, because I think it’s the most important.  Not only will it help YOU the most, it’ll benefit others who are truly, truly in a bad place. We all know that there are people and animals in the world who are suffering. Do a little research and find a cause and organization that really speaks to your heart.

Below are a few closest to my own heart:

I don’t mind, and I’ve never minded, being looked upon as someone who thinks they can save the world.  Tree Hugger? Fine.  Mrs. Do-Gooder?  Whatever.   When you look outside of your own window and see all that needs to be done, you’ll leave yourself with little time to feel anything but determined. And busy.

Never, ever think of your home as “empty.”  Think of it as “full” – full of love, full of fun, full of laughs,  full of comfort, and full of good times just waiting to happen.  Create an environment that everyone wants to come home to.  If you dwell on the negatives, that won’t exactly draw them in, will it?

Keep the pot of coffee on standby, cookies in the cookie jar, throw pillows on the couch, and a big, warm smile on your face.

You’ll have more smiling faces around you than you’ll know what to do with.

One day you’ll find yourself thinking, “Man… I could use a little alone time with just me and Blanche. And Dorothy. And Rose. And Sophia….“

A final thought: Nothing is truly EMPTY if there’s someone or something there. That’s like Common Sense 101. Even if you’re the only bird in the nest at the moment… you have my permission to have a one bird party in that nest.

Let the feathers fly!

A Wild Saturday Night

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Bo the next day!
I know you’ve heard the phrase never a dull moment – well now you get to meet the person whose life it was coined for.

Last night this 5’2″ mother of three chased, wrestled and rolled with a pit bull. My body hurts. I wasn’t cut out for this sort of thing.  I had the first asthma attack I’d had in years and a few of my cats have post traumatic stress syndrome.

I’m a cooking in the kitchen, hanging out at the coffee shop kind of gal – decidedly not a pit bull tamer.

The dog in question – (during the ruckus I named him “Dang Dog!”) – somehow found our very quiet, fence-enclosed bird, raccoon, possum, rabbit, cat and deaf dog (little Wednesday‘s hearing isn’t what it once was) sanctuary. Normally, it’s just the 5 of us humans, a small, almost totally deaf and nearsighted, older dog and five precious cats. We have plenty of wildlife visitors but DangDog! was particularly interested in the cats.

It’s puzzling how he even got back here. We live on the outskirts of town, behind a business that’s protected by a metal, password-protected gate. He either knew the code or has discovered a LARGE hole in one of the fences.  Or he can fly.

We first saw him when a few of my girls and I got back from the store. Wednesday (our little dog) came out of the garage, par usual, to greet us. Then something par unusual happened – out came a large, muscular dog behind him. None of the cats were around at the time – and D.D. really didn’t seem interested in causing problems for Wednesday….until my smart little boy growled up at him. The pit bull wasn’t too happy about that. He was, however, happy about me – he wanted to be my best friend.

He kept standing up with his paws on my shoulders licking my face. Fortunately, of all the things I’m scared of, dogs aren’t one of them. He was a sweetheart to me and never posed a danger at all (to me).  I’m the biggest animal lover in the world and I think animals pick up on that.

But, like I said, we have 5 cats and a much smaller, disadvantaged dog, so my oldest daughter and I lured him away – on the other side of the mechanical gate. I took a package of hot dogs for him which he ate before we even got out of our driveway.

Big ol’ mouth.

I couldn’t help noticing that mouth. I finally got him on one side of the gate and me on the other…which took some doing because he was convinced that he was my dog and I was his… I dunno…. mom?

After a while, when I looked way up at the main gate, I didn’t see him – so I thought “Good, he went home.” I wanted more than anything for him to get somewhere safe – I felt for sure he was someone’s dog. He was the picture of health and wasn’t the least bit afraid of anything.  Or anyone.

So, much later I’m out in the yard in the pitch black darkness – putting Wednesday’s sweater back on him, fresh from being washed in Woolite.

I have some lovely pink pajamas and pink fuzzy house-shoes on – just in case you’re trying to picture the scene – there’s lots of pink.

I saw our smallest cat, Alexa (she was an outdoor cat at the time) in the driveway and was I walking toward her to oooh and ahhhh, tell her how beautiful she is…you know that sort of thing. Then, out of nowhere Dang Dog! comes flying at Alexa (this is where I name him) and like a scene from a nature show… or a nightmare…. he chases her, snapping at her tail. Of course, I’m running after them, in pink fuzzy house-shoes that really sort of “complete” the picture, through the wet, cold yard –  screaming his new name, which he refuses to answer to.

Off come the fuzzy shoes and my bare feet meet the cold wet ground.

I launch onto the dog’s back and down we go.  Alexa takes flight up a tree, reasoning that she still has 8 lives left.  D.D! starts licking my face – it at least lets me know I’m still alive. By now, my asthma’s pretty angry and breathing isn’t coming easily. I put my arms around his neck and try to convince him to let me help him along – to my van. I figure I’ll drive to every house within a mile and ask if they’re missing a large, cat chasing bundle of strength.

Man was this dog strong.

Just as we’re edging along in the dark, with Alexa watching from on high – another of our youngest cats, Bo,  thinks it’s the perfect time to come creeping over to see what all the fuss is about. He sees Double D at the same time Double D sees him….and wer’e off again!

Once again, the dog is right on the home team’s butt….once again I dive onto the dog’s butt and Bo propels himself up yet another tree. Thankfully, God’s a cat lover and we live in a yard with lots of trees. Bo scampers up a tree and I just lay there with everything I have TO wrap wrapped around this crazy dog.

By now, I’m totally amazed that this dog hasn’t eaten my face off yet.  He just kept licking it – and doing the paws on the shoulder thing that really didn’t amuse me much anymore. Fortunately, my husband heard the yelling from inside the house and came out to help. We put him (the dog, not the husband) into the van and off we went to find his home.

Bo and Alexa are pretty jumpy today, and I can hardly move.  Seriously, every bone in my body hurts. The knees and elbows are understandable – crashing onto a hard cold ground will do that.  The back is understandable, too, since this was a very heavy and strong dog.  But my chin?!  I don’t even remember hitting it.  Oh, well. My babies are all okay and the dog’s safe. He has quite a story to tell about a crazy cat lady with coffee on her breath and pink house-shoes.

The picture at the top of the post is Bo looking up at the tree that saved his life.  He’s nothing if not dramatic.  Alexa’s eyes seem fixed in a wide stare.  She jumps at every little sound – convinced that evil’s lurking behind each tree.  My little buddy Wednesday doesn’t seem to know anything went on – he’s pretty much in his own little. oblivious world. But I’ve given him strict orders, no more entertaining friends while were away.

Welcome to Self Help Daily!

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Adam and Alexa

Adam and Alexa

My name is Joi (“Joy”) and I’d love to welcome you to Self Help Daily:  A self help blog, self improvement website, a self growth resource, and a portal of information,  inspiration and motivation.  You absolutely honor me with your presence.   Your presence… and more to the point.. YOU are the entire reason behind Self Help Daily. In my opinion, a life is best spent (and most valuable) reaching out to others with encouragement, inspiration, and motivation.  I want to spend my life doing just that.

Self Help Daily has big plans – very big plans.  It really doesn’t even think of itself as a blog, it fancies itself more of an online magazine, a blogazine if you will. I’m not interested in giving you JUST my opinions, and I have no intention of asking you to play the role of audience as I go on about what I’ve eaten or bought this week (sometimes I read other people’s “self help” or “self improvement” ventures and wonder, “How is that even remotely helpful to anyone?!?!”).  Make absolutely no mistake about it, this website and blog are about you, not me.

Tons of additions will be coming into place over the next few weeks. We really hope you’ll bookmark us and check back often.  We promise to have something for everyone.  Please leave comments frequently – I very much look forward to hearing what you think on the issues we talk about… I already know what I think.

Inspirational and Motivational Quotes

You’ll find a growing collection of motivational quotes on Self Help Daily. These quotations, sayings, poems, and song lyrics will move and inspire you to get the most out of life by getting the most out of yourself. Our quote collection is categorized by topic as well as by author.  A few of the authors you’ll find in our Quotes Collection are:

Self Help Articles

In addition to the posts on the self help blog section, we also have a self help articles section.  These articles feature self improvement and self growth articles written, not only by me, but other contributing authors.  You’ll find excerpts from the classics as well as excerpts from future classics.

About the Polar Bears, Cats, Birds, and Other Animals on Self Help Daily

Polar Bears, cats, wolves,  birds, arctic seals, (seriously, the list could go on forever) are  great passions of mine. The well-being and protection of all animals from cats to polar bears are among the causes that I’ve personally decided to vocalize. I choose to use them frequently, to keep their beautiful faces and plights in front of as many human eyes as possible.

Truth be told, I’m completely obsessed with and fascinated by all animals.  I use pictures of animals and birds frequently on all of my websites for the same reason my home is filled with animal art prints, figurines, and so forth.  I believe strongly in surrounding yourself with things you love…. things that make you smile.  As long as my husband, daughters, cats (and any other animal or bird that blesses me with its presence) are near – there’s a big smile on my face and in my heart.  I believe that’s why God gave us animals in the first place and I, for one, don’t let a day go by without losing myself in their magic.

Make each moment count double!

~ Joi