When this infographic landed in my e-mail, I couldn’t help but smile. I am, quite possibly, the most non-confrontational person to ever walk on two legs. I can’t speak for three or four-legged people, but I’m all but certain I hold the title among the two legged.
People do, of course, have different temperaments and personalities – as well as different experiences and life stories. Each of these things go into making us the way we are, for better or worse.
Personally, I think something else contributes to this particular train and you don’t have to look any further than your mom and/or dad.
Many times, if we’re raised by at least one parent who has an outgoing… confrontational, when need be… personality, we tend to pull back. It could be simply because we grew up knowing they would take care of everything. They had our back, so to speak, so we didn’t even have to turn around, let alone add our two cents to the moment.
It can, of course, go even further. If, by way of our own personality and temperament, we were somewhat embarrassed by our parent’s gregarious approach to conflict, we pull back EVEN further.
Welcome to my world!
My mom was NOT a wallflower. She was the most amazing, predominant piece of furniture… and she didn’t sit against the wall… oh no! She’d be the amazing, predominant piece of furniture in the middle of the room. Smack in the middle with a lamp shining on her. That was my mother and I loved her greatly.
While I was more the comfy chair next to the window, I did, usually appreciate her placement in the spotlight. However, there were times when (as a calm and quiet chair) she would mortify me in public. If her steak wasn’t “just right,” the server and cook would know about it. If we had waited beyond an acceptable amount of time at the clinic, the entire room would soon be aware of just how many minutes we’d been there.
If a salesperson, nurse, doctor, or electrician was rude, they’d soon pay the piper.
My dad and I exchanged so many, “She’s about to blow…” glances over the years and nearly as many, “She blew…” glances.
Two different teachers flat-out wronged me in high-school and – by the time it was all over – I almost felt sorry for them. You see, nothing would elicit an eruption quite like thinking her only child had been wronged.
I wonder if either teacher has recovered yet?
At any rate, I am non-confrontational to the extreme. If you’re a similar “comfy chair” (And let me go ahead and say there’s nothing wrong with that! What’s a room without chairs, after all?!), you’ll enjoy this infographic as much as I did.
~ Joi (“Joy”)