“A designer knows he has achieved perfection not when there is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.” –Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
” I’m not sure what the future holds but I do know that I’m going to be positive and not wake up feeling desperate. As my dad said ‘Nic, it is what it is, it’s not what it should have been, not what it could have been, it is what it is.’ “ – Nicole Kidman, after her split with Tom Cruise
First of all, fellas, sorry there are no pictures of Nicole Kidman here. You don’t really want to see a beautiful redhead anyway, do you??
Back to the quote at the top of the page – I love this quote! I loved it the first time I read it, years ago when Nicole Kidman was putting her life back together after a devastating break up with Tom Cruise; and I love it just as much today when life finds the gorgeous actress blissfully in love and starting a family with country music star and fellow Aussie Keith Urban.
I guess there’s a lot to be said for keeping your head up and your eyes on the road ahead. You never know what (or who) is headed your way.
When bad things… things that are out of our control… happen to us we have choices to make. The choices we make will determine just how “bad” the “bad” will be AND just how much of our future it will touch.
These choices are pretty clear. We can either…
….get bitter or get better.
…..move forward or fall back.
…..learn from it or lean on it.
If you think of life as a long and winding road, disappointments and disasters can be thought of as anything that interferes with the ebb and flow of your trip. Just as a road trip can be affected by rain, road work, vehicular malfunctions, other drivers, and detours – life has plenty of bumps as well. Things that make you say, “This isn’t how I planned it!!”
Of course, in both instances, sometimes you simply lose your way. Times when you have to regroup, remind yourself where you want to go and then drive off into the sunset again – vowing to hit your mark this time!
The point is, there will be problems ahead and they’re not all bad. If nothing else, they keep things interesting and keep us on our toes. They can even, if we handle them properly, make us better – but if we allow ourselves to be overcome by them, they’ll make us bitter and angry, neither of which is very attractive. Sometimes, in the words of Nicole Kidman’s dad, we have to realize, “It is what it is, it’s not what it should have been, not what it could have been, it is what it is.”
Stewing over situations doesn’t change them…it only changes us, and never for the better. Let it go and move on. Go forward, don’t stand still, and never, ever try to go back.
Not only should we choose better over bitter and forward over backward, we should pay extra attention to how we “play” the last choice as well. We have to make certain that we LEARN from disappointments rather than LEAN on them. They aren’t crutches or excuses – they’re lessons. They aren’t tickets excusing us from doing our best, they’re trumpets encouraging us to stand up and give our absolute best.
For more inspirational quotes, click the link! Sorry, there are no other pictures of Nicole Kidman there either.
We are here to add what we can to life, not to get what we can from it. – William Osler
More Quotes About Life.
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It’s not something I’m particularly fond of doing, but I do (every now and then) reflect on mistakes I’ve made – whether they were in the past year, the past day….or if I’m in really rare form, in the past hour. No, I’m not a pessimist. And I’m definitely not a sadist – I’m a realist. A realist who has come to realize that our greatest lessons lie in the text books of our mistakes.
If you were to think back over some of your own beauts, you’d find lessons that were learned, whether you even realized it at the time or not. Maybe you nearly made yourself sick-and-or-nuts by trying to do too much. You realized what you were doing, scaled back and learned a very valuable lesson.
Maybe you misspelled a word in a blog post and were called out by a human spell checker. Perhaps the bite of their words caused you to double check your’s forevermore.
Maybe one of your biggest mistakes was a big fat jump into the wrong conclusion and the lesson, “Look before you leap” has stayed with you since. (Make no mistake about it….excuse the pun….this lesson is a great one!)
So, the next time you make a mistake, don’t kick yourself around 4 counties. Don’t stew in your own juices, and most certainly don’t call yourself hateful names.
Rather, take yourself out for a Latte (or Frappuccino if the weather’s warm) and toast yourself for a brand new lesson. You won’t be celebrating the mistake – you’ll be celebrating the lesson it taught and the wisdom you’ve gained. Said another way, you’ll be toasting to self growth – so, go ahead and have a cookie, too.
Hold each mistake accountable for itself – demand your lesson!
*** By the by, a warm and wonderfully friendly woman recently e-mailed me asking if she could use one of my Quote graphics on the site (I believe it was on one of the Quotes pages). She said she had trouble finding images for her posts and would love to use one I’d made about Eagerness. I told her exactly what I’m telling you now – I’d be honored for you to use any of the ones I’ve done, as long as you give an active link back to Self Help Daily on your blog or web site. I’m making more that’ll be popping up all over the site – all I ask if for a link back.
Does that make me a link desperado? I guess you could bet your sweet a href it does.
“A book is the only place in which you can examine a fragile thought without breaking it, or explore an explosive idea without fear it will go off in your face. It is one of the few havens remaining where a man’s mind can get both provocation and privacy.” ~Edward P. Morgan