“Almost everything you do will seem insignificant, but it is important that you do it” – Mahatma Gandhi
Self Help Daily
Thursday Throwback to 1923: How to Get What You Want in Life
Today’s Thursday Throwback is from a real powerhouse of motivation: Elsie Lincoln Benedict. This is an excerpt from a lesson-lecture that she delivered to students in various cities of the United States long, long, long ago. Don’t let the multiple longs fool you, though. The advice, the motivation, the inspiration, and the grit will leave an impression on you. I plan to publish more of this amazing lady’s teachings on Self Help Daily because she moves me. She simply moves me.
I will type in Elsie Lincoln’s Benedict’s words as they appear in the texts I have.When I skip around a little (because some illustrations simply aren’t built for time traveling), you’ll see a family of dots….. just call them The Dots and follow them to the next room. Once or twice you’ll notice something in parenthesis – this is where I pitch in my two cents for clarification. Having read the entire series of lectures, some things may be clearer to me – and I thought I’d wipe the window, so that you can see more clearly as well.
When the writing/teaching begins, Elise Lincoln Benedict is addressing the subject of “Making Your Desires Materialize.”
Enjoy! ~ Joi
HOW TO MAKE YOUR DESIRES MATERIALIZE by Elsie Lincoln Benedict, 1923
The distance we cover (in the pursuit of our desires) depends on the number of hurdles we are able to take and the speed with which we cover the distance between.
We may run along for quite a while on smooth ground, thinking “Everything’s going to be smooth from here on,” but pretty soon looming up ahead we descry an obstacle. It may be a low one which we scarcely notice. Or it may be a high one. If we refuse to scale it, thinking it looks impossible, or if we are tired of running, we can stop right there and our progress ends….
But if we draw upon our courage we will always find that this hurdle, high and forbidding though it appears, is nothing compared to the first ones (previous obstacles, trials and tribulations). Because we have developed strength from jumping those before – a strength we are not aware of till we put it to the test, but which never fails us if we take a good jump and try for it….
There come times in every human life when the game doesn’t seem worth the candle. But it is. When the price looks bigger than the prize. But it never is.
The price is always less, when you come right down to paying it, than it looks to be – just as a piece of work looks impossible as long as you postpone it but is suddenly easy when you begin.
Life always lets you make your own decisions and she takes you at your word. Your words always express themselves in your secret attitudes.
To try to fool others is bad enough, but to fool yourself is fatal. You never can really fool your subconsciousness. It knows whether you really want a thing or not, and whether you are in earnest.
If you are not it lets you alone. But if you are it will find a way. It will help you get what you really want MOST.
You may not believe it at first glance, but many poverty-stricken, sick, shiftless failures already have what they want most in life.
They won’t admit it to you, but in their inmost souls they know it is true.
They don’t really want riches, health, and success MOST. They only WISH they wanted these things most.
What they really want most of all is doing what they please with their time, taking things easy, sleeping late, overeating, being free of responsibilities – and they are getting every one of them!
They delude themselves with the notion that they are getting them for nothing – that success, health and happiness would cost more. But the fact is that they are paying the highest price for the worst articles when the very best could be had at a bargain.
If you have ever seen a man trying to get out of work, you know that he worked twice as hard at it as those who pitched in and did something….
Your great subconscious will get for you the things you want MOST in life. It will do so more completely and more quickly than you can believe. It will do so with unerring accuracy and unfaltering, unswerving perfection.
If you want happiness, success, fame, it will show you how to get them. They must be paid for, but the price is not as high as you think, not even as great as that we pay for failure.
I often think of the world as a colossal department store. In it are all the things we want, displayed on the counters within reach of all, and to be had the moment we pay for them.
If we really want the things we SAY we want, we will do what we always do to get the things we want in the store – walk up and pay for them and TAKE them.
You see something you say you want. But if you are not willing to pay for it, Life knows you only wish for it.
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I’ll continue the lecture next Thursday. Trust me, it only gets better!
Make a Difference in the Life of a Child This Christmas
“We make a living through what we get, but we make a life through what we give.” – Winston Churchill
During a Christmas season when all of us are feeling the tightening of the money belt,we have to be careful not to get sidetracked with the wrong kinds of thoughts…. “stinkin’ thinkin'” as it were. Christmas shouldn’t be a time for worrying, fretting, or stressing over how much we’re able to buy or not buy. Christmas is a time for celebrating!
Now, having said that, I completely understand wanting to have the house all decked out in beautiful colors and lights. I understand wanting to have oodles of cookies, piles of fudge, and jars of homemade candies. As a doting (there really can be no other word for it) wife and mother, I most certainly understand wanting to buy your husband the best sweaters, your daughters the loveliest lovelies, and your sons the best games. What’s more, we want them all wrapped in the most gorgeous gift wrapping possible.
Then there’s the bank balance – letting you know, every step of the way, that this year isn’t quite like any other. At least not one like most of us have ever seen. Since I can remember, Christmas was always bright, wonderful, and lavish. As an only child, most Christmases presented me with so many presents I was positively worn out at the end of it all.
However, none of the toys, stuffed animals, bikes, barbie airports, barbie townhouses, dolls (not even the one that tumbled) symbolize Christmas for me. When I think back over my favorite Christmases, I think of…
- My MeMe’s divinity – she was paralyzed on one side but could outbake just about anyone!
- My mom’s peanut butter fudge
- The year my grandmother set out her Nativity set and gave Mary’s position to a shepherd and put Mary in the back with the sheep. When I asked her why she wanted to change history, she nearly collapsed in laughter. I was 10 at the time, but her laugh is still in my mind… and heart.
- The year my mom broke with tradition and decorated her tree all fru-fru like with mauve bows, angel heads, and baby’s breath. My very traditional dad snarled at it every time he passed by it. One night as he happened to be turning off the lights, my mom called from the back of the house, “Turn off the tree lights, we don’t want it catching fire!” Just then, he flipped the switch back on and winked at me.
- The first year my husband and I were married – he was in the military and money wasn’t exactly flowing in our direction. We went to a craft’s store and loaded up on supplies. Then we went home and, after I baked us some warm chocolate chip cookies – we made gifts for everyone in our family. They still have, and treasure, them! We had a blast, too. I do remember, however, losing my husband a few times during the process when football was on television. Then, again to be fair, he lost me a few times when UK basketball was on.
- Watching Christmas specials with our girls when they were little. These days, if Johnny Depp, Miley Cyrus, or Tyra isn’t in the special – my girls aren’t in the room. That’s cool with me, my cat Alexa and I watch them anyway!
- I remember our cat Prissy always climbing the Christmas tree -every single year! I stopped using breakable ornaments when she was still alive, because I didn’t want her hurting herself. Get this – I didn’t even use the hooks during the Prissy years. When she hit 20 years, she didn’t get much higher than the bottom branch, but she still gave it a go. Thankfully, Alexa (a good 10 pounds heavier) is content to lie under the tree and sneak into presents.
The list of memories goes on and on and on, but the remarkable thing is, what I received or didn’t receive is nowhere near the top of the list. It just didn’t matter. Laughter did, love did, chocolate did. And Mary in the field.
If you’re cutting back this year, don’t fret it and don’t sweat it! In fact, I’d like to make a suggestion: Take a particular area and do something completely selfless and wonderful instead. For example: If you planned on decorating the outside of your house, use the money for Toys for Tots instead. Go to the website and find out when they’ll be collecting toys in your area, then go straight to the store and buy some fantastic toys to give. If you do this (for example) in place of lighting up your house – you will have a great deal of money to spend on toys.
Which had you rather light up – your yard or the face of a child in need. Not even close.
Another suggestion: If your office normally has a huge Christmas party or dinner, suggest this year that each individual brings in a toy for children. Then, appoint someone to take the collection to Toys for Tots or another agency which is moving Heaven and earth to help children. If you and I are feeling the pinch this year, for crying out loud (literally) can you imagine the predictament others are in? The thought of a child not having a present on Christmas makes me want to cry. (In fact, there come the tears now.)
I’m just incredibly afraid that, this year, toys and donations are going to be especially low and there will be many, many children left out.
Please, please, please go to Toys for Tots right now and learn more about your local campaign.
If you make one precious child smile this Christmas – whether you realize it or not, you had a richer Christmas than most could ever hope for. The smile on a child’s face will warm God’ s heart more than a billion lights. I suspect it’s the kind of light show angels line up to see!
The Skinny on Willpower: How to Develop Self Discipline
I’ve fallen completely in love with books that are as visual as they are motivational, educational, inspirational, and helpful. Guardians of Being by Eckhart Tolle with illustrations by Patrick McDonnell (creator of MUTTS) is a perfect example. I fell hard for that book and now I’ve fallen hard again.
The Skinny on Willpower, How to Develop Self Discipline by Jim Randel is a first-class example of a book that’s a lof of fun to look at and a lot of fun to read… yet, amongst all of the smiles is a great, great deal of useful and helpful information.
“Willpower isn’t something that gets handed out to some and not to others… it’s a skill you can develop through understanding and practice.” – Gillian Riley
The adorable stick figures in this book get into a whole mess of situations. You follow the skinny little characters as they learn about willpower and “making it happen.” Basically, The Skinny on Willpower, How to Develop Self Discipline is a great lesson on self-discipline and willpower told in a story format. You’ll find lessons, bullet points, and quotes throughout the book as well. The characters, through trial and error and with help from the author (moderator), they find the path to making their dreams come true.
The best part, of course, is we can find the same path. The author serves as the moderator for our lives as well. This book is honestly filled with fantastic advice – all presented in a way that’ll be completely fresh and new to each reader. Come on, I read as much as a cat sleeps – I’ve seen every kind of book there is. And as much as I love books, they can sometimes become monotonous. You’ll be halfway through the book and have to look at the cover to see which book it is you’re reading. There have been times when I would have sworn I’d read a book before – when, in actuality – it was a new book… just old material and worn out thoughts.
With The Skinny on Willpower, How to Develop Self Discipline, I certainly didn’t have to look at the cover any! This book is a very refreshing and fun read. I hope you’ll find a copy asap and devour every word. It won’t take long to do so as the book reads incredibly fast. But it stays with you forever.
I’ll end with an excerpt from the book, itself. In one of the strongest parts of the book, the author lays out the three key steps you need to take in order to prepare yourself to be able to sustain the resolve you need to accomplish a goal. The first step he gives is, “Take Your Temperature.”
Page 67: TAKE YOUR TEMPERATURE:
No, not that kind of temperature. What we mean is ask yourself how badly you want to achieve your goal. One of the most famous self improvement authors (Napoleon Hill) speaks to the need for “a desire of white-hot intensity,” In other words, do you really, really want to achieve your goal? The good news is that if you do, you can almost stop reading.
You know the expression, “Where there’s a will, there’s a way”? Well, many achievement authors would say the same thing a little differently.
“Where there’s a will, there’s willpower.”
In other words, if you want something badly enough, your internal programming (for survival) will kick in and help you find the self-discipline you need along the path to your goal.
But don’t kid yourself. If your temperature is not high enough – if you do not want something badly enough – why bother? Your willpower will fade when the going gets tough – and whenever you seek something of value, the going will always get tough. The Skinny on Willpower, How to Develop Self Discipline by Jim Randel – pages 66 – 67
Attitude: The Heart and Soul of Everything
Chuck Swindoll on the importance of attitude:
The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than success, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company … a church … a home, or an individual.
The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for the day. We cannot change our past … we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude.
I am convinced that life is ten percent what happens to me and ninety percent how I react to it. And so it is with you. We are in charge of our attitudes.
“I am convinced that life is ten percent what happens to me and ninety percent how I react to it.” I completely agree with Mr. Swindoll on that one. How often do we compound a bad situation – making it much worse than it needs to be? About as often as we make mountains out of ant hills!
Last night, I was lying in the floor with my cat Alexa – watching a little football and nursing a MAJOR toothache (my cooking marathon included about a gazilion Advils, two gazillion salty mouth rinses, and a couple billion, “Owwwww’s,” all of which did nothing – then I sat at the feast with my loved ones and couldn’t even eat!). I heard my husband at his computer (which is in the middle of what surely must be a slow death). After an ominous “restarting” sound from the computer, I heard my husband say something like, “Yes. That’s what I was hoping you’d do.”
No throwing pens, no turning the air blue… just a little sarcastic jab at a machine that deserved much more. I asked him if he was encouraging it now and he said it didn’t do any good to do anything else.
True enough. I’ve said it many, many times on this blog – and even more times in my day to day life: Sometimes you just have to say, “It is what it is. ” It’s one of my most used phrases and, somehow, it always helps. Another of my favorites is, “If this is the worst thing that happens to me this year, I’ve got it made.”
Bad, unsavory, and sometimes even ugly things are going to happen to us and around us. And if you’re still waiting for life to be fair…. excuse me while I chuckle. The amazing thing is, it’s well within our power to make these things worse or better. “I am convinced that life is ten percent what happens to me and ninety percent how I react to it.”