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You are here: Home / Archives for Self Help / Problem Solving

Problem Solving

How to Really Live in the Moment

February 13, 2019 by Joi Leave a Comment

by Adrian

You’ve got to live in the moment… it’s easy advice to give out and to hear, but is it quite so easy to put into practice? Living in the moment and paying attention to what is happening right now around you sounds wonderful, but with so much going on and everyone being so busy, it also might sound impossible.

The good news is that it’s not impossible. In fact, there are some simple ways to really live in the moment that you can start implementing today, and you’ll soon start to feel the benefits.

Conquer Your Addictions
Addictions can be the thing that is stopping you from enjoying your life to the fullest and really being able to live in the moment. If you are always looking for the next drink or fix of drugs, or the next chance to smoke a cigarette, for example, then you won’t be noticing what is happening around you. Get help with your addiction from The Recovery Village, not just so that you can live in the moment but because they can lead to all kinds of health issues including borderline personality disorder (BPD).

Remove What You Don’t Need
Living a more minimal life doesn’t mean you have to give up everything and live on just bread and water. It simply means that it’s time to clear away anything that you no longer need or that doesn’t make you happy. Older possessions are often linked to memories, and although some memories are good, others may not be so great, and it is these items that should be discarded.

If you really can’t bear to remove them entirely from your home, put them in a box and place them in the attic, basement, or into storage. That way, your home will be full of things that you love without causing clutter that can cause stress. Remember, living or sleeping in a room where piles are high can lead to poor sleeping patterns and added worry. Minimalism is a great means of keeping stress to a minimum.

Appreciate The Little Things
To start living in the moment, you need to appreciate the little things, no matter how small. If they cheer you up and make you stop and pause to think, then they are worth admiring. It might be a sunrise, a beautiful sky, a flower growing where nothing else can, a cat lounging in a front yard, or any number of little, day to day things that will keep you grounded and happy. Use all of your senses including sight, smell, and hearing, and enjoy everything.

Forgive
By walking around holding onto past hurts, you are never able to truly live in the moment and enjoy it for what it is. There will always be something holding you back from fully engaging with what is happening around you.

It is best, therefore, to choose to forgive those who have hurt you and move on with your life. If you don’t, you are missing out on the happiness you could be having, and they will have hurt you even more. Let go of grudges.

Author: Adrian is a lifelong thrill seeker and adrenaline junkie. A freelance sports writer, Adrian is passionate about health and fitness and pushing his body to limits. Whether he’s rambling in the beautiful Cotswolds or bunjy jumping in New Zealand, Adrian is a fervent believer in making the most of the great outdoors.

Filed Under: Articles by Various Authors, Problem Solving

How to Drink More Water (Infographic)

November 30, 2018 by Joi Leave a Comment

Ever have something you know you SHOULD do, yet struggle getting from SHOULD to DO? While I have a running, ever-changing list of such things, drinking water is one that has been consistent.

For years.

Seriously… years.

There are a million and one health benefits (ranging from healthier lungs to better skin) but this gal just can’t seem to chug the goodness that is water. Not when, oh you know, there are other drinks like tea and coffee (hot or iced, I’m not picky).

I was sent a wonderful infographic to share with you and, ironically, it may be the thing that actually helps me in the process.

The tips toward the end of the infographic sound really useful – maybe so useful that this may be something I kick off my “should do” list soon. If you have a similar struggle, I think you’ll find it just as helpful.

Let’s toast to it! (I’m toasting with iced coffee this time, but next time I’ll toast with water.) ~ Joi (“Joy”)


How to Drink More Water
Infographic Courtesy of: Pounds to Pocket

Filed Under: Health, Infographics, Problem Solving Tagged With: health infographic, how to drink more water

Get Your Brain Back on Track: 9 Ways to Focus a Wandering Mind (Infographic)

March 14, 2018 by Joi Leave a Comment

I’m not sure if it’s because, as an only child, I grew up spending A LOT of time daydreaming and jumping from one fun scenario to the next or if I’m simply bent toward the habit but I get mentally off track as easily as cheap aluminum foil gets off its track.

I can be in the middle of reading a book and, even if it’s a great book, find my mind suddenly in my flower bed making sure my zinnias aren’t giving my moss roses too much shade. By the same token, I can be in one of my flower beds thinking about something I’d read that morning.

This mind.. I swear… it is all over the place!

The following infographic has some really great tips on lassoing the wandering mind and pulling it back to where you need it to be.

Enjoy!

Courtesy of: On Stride

I love the concept of actually taking a minute to think about something different from what’s at hand… then getting right back on track. I actually did this this morning while reading – I paused between chapters and… you guessed it…. mentally planned one of my flower beds. Satisfied that it’d be both colorful and successful, I returned to my book and was able to give it my undivided attention.

Give these tips a try for yourself and let me know in the comments which is your favorite! Of course, if you have an entirely different method of your own, let us all know about it!

~ Joi (“Joy”)

Filed Under: General, Infographics, Problem Solving Tagged With: how to focus, Infographic

The Non-Confrontational Person’s Guide to Conflict

February 5, 2018 by Joi Leave a Comment

When this infographic landed in my e-mail, I couldn’t help but smile. I am, quite possibly, the most non-confrontational person to ever walk on two legs. I can’t speak for three or four-legged people, but I’m all but certain I hold the title among the two legged.

People do, of course, have different temperaments and personalities – as well as different experiences and life stories. Each of these things go into making us the way we are, for better or worse.

Personally, I think something else contributes to this particular train and you don’t have to look any further than your mom and/or dad.

Many times, if we’re raised by at least one parent who has an outgoing… confrontational, when need be… personality, we tend to pull back. It could be simply because we grew up knowing they would take care of everything. They had our back, so to speak, so we didn’t even have to turn around, let alone add our two cents to the moment.

It can, of course, go even further. If, by way of our own personality and temperament, we were somewhat embarrassed by our parent’s gregarious approach to conflict, we pull back EVEN further.

Welcome to my world!

My mom was NOT a wallflower. She was the most amazing, predominant piece of furniture… and she didn’t sit against the wall… oh no! She’d be the amazing, predominant piece of furniture in the middle of the room. Smack in the middle with a lamp shining on her. That was my mother and I loved her greatly.

While I was more the comfy chair next to the window, I did, usually appreciate her placement in the spotlight. However, there were times when (as a calm and quiet chair) she would mortify me in public. If her steak wasn’t “just right,” the server and cook would know about it. If we had waited beyond an acceptable amount of time at the clinic, the entire room would soon be aware of just how many minutes we’d been there.

If a salesperson, nurse, doctor, or electrician was rude, they’d soon pay the piper.

My dad and I exchanged so many, “She’s about to blow…” glances over the years and nearly as many, “She blew…” glances.

Two different teachers flat-out wronged me in high-school and – by the time it was all over – I almost felt sorry for them. You see, nothing would elicit an eruption quite like thinking her only child had been wronged.

I wonder if either teacher has recovered yet?

At any rate, I am non-confrontational to the extreme. If you’re a similar “comfy chair” (And let me go ahead and say there’s nothing wrong with that! What’s a room without chairs, after all?!), you’ll enjoy this infographic as much as I did.

~ Joi (“Joy”)

The Non-Confrontational Person's Guide to Conflict (Infographic)

Credit: The Non-Confrontational Person’s Guide to Conflict

Filed Under: Infographics, Positive Thought, Problem Solving, Self Growth Tagged With: self help infographic, self improvement infographic

If You’re a Hoarder (or Love One), 2018 Could Be The Year to Clean House Once and For All!

January 2, 2018 by Joi Leave a Comment

Can you believe it’s New Year’s Resolutions time again? Didn’t it seem like we were just making them last month? I actually had success with some of my resolutions from last year, so I’m really excited to tackle the ones I’ve made this year.

While I’m not a hoarder, I am pretty bad about holding on to things too long. I’m one of those who often tends to attach emotion and sentimentality to objects, so parting with them can be tough. HOWEVER, I have fallen head over heels in love with the way openness looks AND feels. I recently cleaned off a set of shelves in my home office and get a natural high each time I walk by it now.

It looks better. It feels better.

My own difficulties with “letting things go” causes me to greatly sympathize with hoarders. If we’re being honest, hoarders are nothing more than “me” on steroids…… “me” out of control. If I were to allow it, I could become one of their team members. I not only sympathize, but I can see how easily it would be for something like that to get out of hand.

One day, you might be “collecting” old books, and a week later you’re surrounded by dusty old books you haven’t touched in years.  Sure, it takes more than a week – but you get the point. Unpleasantness seldom stomps through the front door of our lives, it sneaks in like a stealthy ninja and catches us by surprise. Suddenly we find ourselves looking around and thinking, “Where did all of this stuff come from?!”

Many people are unkindly judgmental of hoarders.  They ask, “Why don’t they just freaking throw things away!!??”  Come on, let’s be reasonable – if it were that easy, don’t you think they would have by now?!

I’m not psychologist – heck, the closest I ever came to psychology were classes I took in High School and College. However, common sense, reading, and knowing/loving a hoarder firsthand has taught me that the hoarding serves to fill a void.

Every single time.

Sometimes the individual has experienced a great deal of loss in their life and accumulating things serves to surround them with things “no one can take away.” Other times the individual (through relationship problems, financial distress, or health issues) has known an uncommon amount of stress in their life and, unknowingly, simply wants to be able to control something…. or rather, some things.

Sadly, the situation escalates to the point that the individual is overwhelmed and choked by their “collection.” To compound the matter, they often catch a great deal of flack from family and friends. I’ve even heard of family members who refuse to visit their “loved one” until they clean up their home.

I’m sorry if this sounds cruel, but that’s about as selfish a reaction as I’ve ever heard of. We should love one another through problems, not hate one another through problems!

If you are a hoarder or feel for certain that you are “on your way,” I hope you will make this the year you break free from these chains. They’re holding you back, holding you down, and holding you at arm’s length from the life you deserve.

What You Gain from Letting Hoarding Go

  • You will feel 110% better. When you walk through your house and things look “pretty,” your mood will soar.
  • You’ll be healthier! Hoarding is as bad for your physical health as it is your emotional and mental health. Excess “things” collect excess dust, which is obviously the worst possible thing for your respiratory system. You’ll find yourself breathing easier and will have to stop and remind yourself exactly why this is.
  • Too many things lying around can also pose a safety problem. Not only are they easy to trip over, excess knick-knacks can post issues for pets and small children.
  • You’ll spend less time searching for things.
  • When you defeat this very REAL problem, you’ll gain so much strength you’ll want to tackle another problem, even if you have to borrow someone else’s!  Whenever we switch positions from being overcome to being the overcomer, we gain a heckuva lot of strength.  And that is an especially beautiful thing.
  • Even if your family still comes around and hasn’t essentially written you off (because they’re cool like that), they will enjoy their visits a great deal more and may even come around more often if you de-clutter and create a cleaner, more open environment. Whether you totally realize it or not, excess clutter is stifling and uncomfortable to be among. This may not make sense to you, but it’s simply the truth… whether you really want it to be or not.

Please allow this to be the year you break out from under this weight. When we feel overwhelmed the absolute hardest step to take is the first one. It feels like a HUGE step uphill in 10 feet of snow! But the good news is that each step thereafter is easier. Before you know it, it doesn’t even feel like you’re going uphill anymore and as for the snow… what snow? Momentum plows right through it.

While you could use the motivation of surprising your loved ones before their next visit to inspire you and get the ball rolling, you have to remember that you’re doing this for you as much as you are for them.

Why? Because you deserve better than what you’re settling for, that’s why!

If it sounds like I’m begging you, know this…. I am. As I said above, I knew and greatly loved a hoarder and, sadly, she never took the first step. Truth be told, she was a hoarder before there was even a word for it. Back in the day, they were simply called “pack rats,” weren’t they?! No matter what name it goes by, it remains a less than best way to live.

Below is an infographic from Simply Self Storage showing what cities hoard the most. Seems to be a real issue in Florida for some reason! Maybe they’re outdoors so often, the indoors is left to its own devices. I’ve lived in Florida before and know darn well how hard it can be to stay indoors.

Self storage units are actually a pretty ingenious solution for things you want to keep but don’t want to keep right under your nose. They keep your possessions safe, preserved, and, usually, within minutes of your home.

While it’s always best to part with what you can, there are somethings that simply can’t be parted with. That doesn’t mean they have to take up valuable closet or shelf space, though!

For more information, see What Cities Hoard the Most on Simply Self Storage’s blog.

Filed Under: Infographics, Problem Solving Tagged With: hoarding, how to deal with hoarding, New Years Resolutions, self improvement infographic

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