Self Help Daily

Inspirational and Self Help Blog with a Save the World Complex...

You are here: Home / Archives for Self Help / Self Awareness

Self Awareness

The Road to Calm Workbook (Review of a Book With Nothing But Relaxing You on Its Mind!)

by Leave a Comment

The Road to Calm Workbook The Road to Calm Workbook
I’ve had quite a few great books sent my way to review lately and the one you see pictured above is yet another winner that was sent my way: The Road to Calm Workbook (Life-Changing Tools to Stop Runaway Emotions) by Carolyn Daitch & Lissah Lorberbaum.

Before I tell you why you’re going to love this book, can we just talk about the cover for a minute?  You may not know this about me, but I am crazy obsessed with book covers. I think a book’s cover should set the mood and set the tone for what’s coming. I’m so fixated on covers that I actually get a little queasy when someone has obviously failed to think through the cover. When I have a book with a beautiful cover that captures the heart of the book, I tend to like it even more.

They say you can’t judge a book by its cover… obviously they didn’t know me!

This cover is so perfectly perfect for this book. The colors, the font used for the text, the clouds, the water… perfect times a million.

Book Description:

A protocol of easy-to-use tools that can be applied when readers experience difficult-to-manage emotions.

Emotional flooding―being overwhelmed by feelings―happens in response to stress, anxiety, and life’s challenges. In this client-orientated accompaniment to Affect Regulation Toolbox, Carolyn Daitch and Lissah Lorberbaum present skills and tools on how to dial down reactivity, practice mindfulness, and focus positively on the future. Written to conquer a broad range of emotional challenges in easily accessibly language, this book is intended to help clients improve the quality of their everyday lives.

The workbook is split into two parts. Part I helps the reader understand when and why emotional flooding occurs. Using vivid stories and examples of others’ triggering situations helps the reader better understand their own triggers, and how to cope with them. Part II provides instructions for “daily stress inoculations,” a daily practice for relaxing and lowering baseline levels of emotional reactivity. The STOP Solution is introduced as a way of learning how to stop or lessen feeling emotionally overwhelmed. STOP stands for Scanning thoughts, feelings, and sensations, Taking a time-out, Overcoming Initial Flooding, and Putting tools into practice.

Throughout the workbook, readers will find guided imagery exercises, opportunities for journaling and reflection, mindfulness practices, and matching audio exercises on the accompanying CD. A complimentary companion app (for information, visit: www.bitly.com/RoadToCalmApp) also enhances readers’ ability to take these exercises on the go. The result of this gentle and reliable program is resilience, well-being, and freedom from the emotional patterns that create suffering and damage relationships.

The Road to Calm Workbook is more than just a book – it’s more of a guide. The authors will guide you through the road-map of your own emotions. Many times you’ll find yourself thinking, “So… that explains why I react this way.” or “Absolutely – that does make me tick.” Becoming more self-aware is one of the healthiest things you can do for yourself and this book is an excellent starting point.

About the Author

Carolyn Daitch, Ph.D., is the director of the Center for the Treatment of Anxiety Disorders in Farmington Hills, Michigan. A clinical psychologist, she is a certified and approved consultant and elected Fellow of the American Society of Clinical Hypnosis as well a Fellow of the Michigan Psychological Association. A frequent invited speaker around the world, she is internationally recognized for her practical and easy to implement interventions.She has written four books, including the award winning Affect Regulation Toolbox: Practical and Effective Hypnotic Interventions for the Over-reactive Client, which has received international acclaim and was awarded best hypnosis book by the Society of Clinical and Experimental Hypnosis in 2008.

Lissah Lorberbaum, MA, holds a master’s degree in clinical psychology with a specialization in somatic psychology and treats affect dysregulation across a wide range of clientele. She is also coauthor of Anxious in Love: How to Manage Your Anxiety, Reduce Conflict, and Reconnect with Your Partner. She lives and works in Los Angeles, CA.

When reviewing a book that deals with self-evaluation, self-realization, and other self-oriented topics, I don’t just read the book for myself – I read what others are saying about the book. This allows me to get a bigger picture of the book and its “reach.” In this case, it was almost a necessity because I’m (by nature) as calm as a cat who just got its belly filled with milk and is reclining in the sun.  Naturally, stressful moments move me – as I’m a content cat, not a dead one.  I found this book to be a fantastic and enjoyable journey, but I couldn’t help wondering what others thought.
When I read other reviews, I found that many people who suffer from anxiety, stress, bad tempers, discouragement and other emotions found this book to be like having a visit with a “therapist” or an old friend. I found that to be fascinating, but not surprising, because the authors have done a wonderful job of putting exercises together with information to help guide the reader to a clearer understanding of their emotions AND how to get the upper hand with these emotions.

Click through and read more about The Road to Calm Workbook (including the testimonies and reviews left by others).

 

8 Keys to Practicing Mindfulness: A Few Thoughts About a Very Special Book

by Leave a Comment

8 Keys to Practicing Mindfulness
8 Keys to Practicing Mindfulness: Practical Strategies for Emotional Health and Well-being
As I said in a recent post on this very self help blog, I don’t like to repeat myself… hearing myself once is plenty enough, when my thoughts and words start going through syndication, I sort of tune out. Having said that, one word I do say again and again is mindfulness.

I was recently sent a great book to read that also has mindfulness on its mind a great deal – 8 Keys to Practicing Mindfulness by Manuela Mischke Reeds. This is one of those self help and inspirational books that reads in a manner you can only describe as lyrical. The text is both wise and beautiful at once and it makes for a very relaxing, introspective, and… well… lovely journey.

Learning how to pay attention to the present moment.

Becoming mindful is about the small, everyday things such as pausing to take a breath before you drive off in a hurry or considering the food that will nourish your body before a meal. Or it can mean checking in with yourself before responding to a challenging email or text.

Every moment of our lives can become an opportunity to practice mindfulness. This book will invite you to sharpen your awareness and ask yourself with more frequency, “What do I notice right now?” or “How do I need to respond or be with this situation?”

These seemingly tiny moments of noticing yourself can have a major impact on your life as you learn to track habitual patterns and awaken to change. Practicing mindfulness is not about being better by figuring it all out. It is about tolerating the moments when you don’t know or learning to be more curious about the struggle.

Here you will learn how to establish a basic practice with guidelines for posture and breathing as well as various options for meditations that involve sitting, walking, gently moving or lying down. You can try these exercises at your lunch break, before you rise or fall asleep. But best of all is for you to sprinkle mindfulness throughout your day.

Whether you are new to mindfulness or a seasoned practitioner, you can make the conscious decision to change your approach to life. Moment by moment you have the opportunity to cultivate awareness that will make a difference in how you engage with the world on a daily basis.

8 Keys to Practicing Mindfulness reminds us that our lives are filled with moments and that to take any of these moments for granted is a waste of epic proportions. I love the concept of (frequently) asking yourself, “What do I notice right now?” While I am generally good at living in the moment, I began to ask myself this question frequently while I was reading this book and have continued to do so since.

My answers have included…

  • wind whistling through the trees
  • my cat’s breathing
  • a hummingbird at a feeder
  • my husband flipping the pages of a newspaper
  • birds singing
  • my youngest daughter painting her nails
  • a kitten swatting at her momma cat’s tail

Moments such as these may not float your boat, but they float my entire fleet. Becoming more aware of the peaceful, downright beautiful moments that fill my day has been a lovely experience and it’s one I’ll take advantage of forever and ever, amen.

{Review Continued Below….}

8 Keys to Practicing Mindfulness

I love the “Everyday Mindfulness Tip”s throughout the book as well as the wonderful “Try This” prompts. Below is a “Try This” dealing with anger:

In a moment of anger, yours or someone else’s, ask these questions: What is the truth behind this anger? If this anger could speak, what would it say? What would be help to calm this intensity right now? What are its physical manifestations? How long does it take for me to think calmly after the anger comes up? If the anger is aimed at me, does it carry a message that is important for me to hear?  – Page 120

Different emotions are dealt with in the various “Try This” prompts – sadness, anger, fear, grief, stress, etc. and they are priceless. The reason I chose the one above is the fact that I love one part of this prompt in particular – I have always tried to identify the source of things said by me (or those around me).  When we are in an emotional state, our emotion very often does the speaking for us. The problem is, emotions will say just about anything! I love that the author asks, “If this anger could speak, what would it say?” This is the golden key at getting to the heart of any emotion you’re dealing with.

Have you ever thought, “I’m kind of blue today, but I don’t know exactly why?” Ask the one who does… the blues, themselves.  This is effective for sadness, anger, and even fear.

When dealing with anger, the benefits of this exercise are two-fold: You’ll realize exactly why you’re feeling so much anger AND you’ll allow anger to have its say – with only you in the audience.

Can you imagine how much hurt could be avoided by allowing anger to whisper to you and you alone instead of taking the microphone like he normally likes to do?!

About the Author

Manuela Mischke Reeds, MA, MFT, is an international teacher of mindfulness-based somatic psychology. She co-directs the Hakomi Institute of California and teaches in the US, Europe, and Australia. A meditation practitioner for over 25 years, Manuela lectures, consults and trains professionals in mindfulness, attachment, trauma, and movement therapy. She maintains a private psychotherapy practice in Menlo Park, CA.

Babette Rothschild, MSW, LCSW, is a bestselling author, editor of the Norton 8 Keys to Mental Health Series, and member of the International Society for Traumatic Stress Studies. She gives lectures and professional trainings around the world. To date, her books have been translated into 13 different languages.

Final Thoughts

Sometimes it seems as though there are more books in the world than anything else – maybe it’s because I review so many books on my websites, but seriously there are a lot of books in the world and even more rolling hot off the presses each day.  For a book to stand out among millions of its kind is a special accomplishment and 8 Keys to Practicing Mindfulness pulls it off with aplomb.

This is a beautiful book that’ll help put you more in touch with you and the world around you. It’s a winner from start to finish.

~ Joi (“Joy”)

8 Keys to Practicing Mindfulness

8 Keys to Practicing Mindfulness

What Your Choice of Jewelry Says About You

by Leave a Comment

You might wear a different type of jewellery every day, or you have your favourite piece of jewellery that you can never be seen without. Either way your choice in the style of jewellery you wear can say an awful lot about your aspirations and your personality. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it can be a great way of figuring out what you feel is important in life, or what hobbies and interests you have. All surmised from that brooch or set of earrings!

So what does your jewellery happen to say about you? We’ll take a look at a few commonly found themes within pieces of jewellery and what they might mean to that particular individual.

Wings
You consider yourself to be a free spirit or one that is not often tied down by any major loyalties. You like the idea of taking a spontaneous holiday halfway across the world and you like challenging yourself. Wings, particularly angel wings, are also used for lost loved ones, normally mothers or grandmothers. As wings or single feathers can be large or small depending on the design, they can work as large broaches or as subtle earrings; it all depends on what you prefer.

Skull and Crossbones
This might be a sign that you are interested in the more morbid side of life; death. You understand the futility of our mortality and plan to meet it head on. You may be fascinated with the way our bodies work or you may have an interest in the structure of our bones. Or you could just be a fan of the Mexican sugar skull traditions alongside the day of the dead.

Hearts
You fancy yourself a romantic. You might have the name of a significant other written inside the heart, or of a loved one that is dear to you. Some people choose hearts to symbolise their memory of a lost loved one, or of a struggle they themselves have overcome. Hearts can often be seen with the cancer ribbon either wrapped around it or incorporated in some way into the design of the jewellery.

themselves have overcome. Hearts can often be seen with the cancer ribbon either wrapped around it or incorporated in some way into the design of the jewellery.

Writing/Script
These jewellery pieces are often the simplest, but can sometimes hold the most meaning. The script can be a famous quote, a certain passage from the bible or similar religious book, or they could be those three simple words. The great thing about the magic of words is the feelings they can stir up in the individual. A few words inscribed on a plaque may not mean a whole lot to someone else, but they could mean the world to you. Having jewellery with writing on it shows that you are a sensitive person who respects the power of the written word. You may have strong family or friend ties and want to show this through the jewellery you wear.

Symbols
The type of symbols you choose from your day-to-day jewellery and your evening wear will say a lot about you as a person. If you are partial to pagan symbols and religious symbols, you market yourself as a very spiritual or religious person. Mathematic symbols are great for the individual who is not afraid to show off their geeky side. If you are a big fan of video games; heart containers, game logos and character sprites all work well as subtle jewellery pieces that give little hints into certain aspects of your personality.

Crosses
You take your faith very seriously, however, you might not always want to yell it out to the heavens. A cross of any size is representative of your dedication to your faith, although the bigger the cross, the more willing you are to perhaps talk about your religion. Having a cross on a piece of jewellery is often also about comfort, as it can provide a lot of support in hard times – having a simple piece of jewellery representative of your faith that you can physically hold and cherish.

Writing/Script
These jewellery pieces are often the simplest, but can sometimes hold the most meaning. The script can be a famous quote, a certain passage from the bible or similar religious book, or they could be those three simple words. The great thing about the magic of words is the feelings they can stir up in the individual. A few words inscribed on a plaque may not mean a whole lot to someone else, but they could mean the world to you. Having jewellery with writing on it shows that you are a sensitive person who respects the power of the written word. You may have strong family or friend ties and want to show this through the jewellery you wear.

Article provided by Mike James, an independent content writer working in the style sector – joining forces together with Nirvana Wholesale for the information in this post.

Self Help Hack: Simplest Way to Make a New Habit Stick

by Leave a Comment

I have fallen woefully behind with adding “Self Help Hacks” to the self help blog. Woe-Full-Leeeee behind. Sorry about that, but here’s one that I think might just have been worth the wait.

Making a New Habit STICK

Adding healthy, positive, beneficial habits to our day can sometimes fall as off track as I did with my “Self Help Hacks.”  Our intentions are grand, but… well… life happens.

Over many years (never you mind how many) of the beginning habits/losing habits/re-beginning habits cycle, I’ve happened upon a simple trick that greatly increases the new habits life expectancy.

  1. Think of a habit you do daily – one that is so regular you hardly even think about it… you just do it. This might be brushing your teeth (morning or night), reading your Bible, checking Twitter first thing in the morning, feeding your cat…
  2. Start doing your new habit immediately after this “regular” habit.
  3. It’ll take a few weeks but, if you’re consistent, your new positive habit will be just as commonplace and regular as the old one.

Bonus Hack: If you want to read more, have a book nearby at all times. Set books by your bed, beside your den chair or spot on the couch, near your computer, etc. Seeing the book lying there – all inviting and all – will serve as a reminder to pick it up and dive in.

Which reminds me, I need to sign off now – mustn’t EVER keep Agatha Christie waiting…

~ Joi

 

Books

Guide to Managing Your Emotions with Aromatherapy

by Leave a Comment

Aromatherapy Infographic
Ironically, when I was contacted about sharing the beautiful infographic above with my Self Help Daily readers, I had just been talking about aromatherapy with two of my three daughters.

Life’s sense of irony always fascinates me.

We had been discussing the wonderful effects from Lavender and Vanilla. I told them that, years ago, when I lost my dad, I had A LOT of trouble unwinding and falling asleep at night. I found that lavender helped calm my frazzled nerves and even soothed my shattered emotions.

Vanilla has a similar effect.  Whether (like me) you work from home or outside the home, you know certain days just have stress written all over them. I once threatened to rename a particular Tuesday “Bluesday” because it did nothing but cause me grief from sunup to sundown.  On days like this, I just automatically reach for one of my favorite candles – usually vanilla or lavender – but I always have seasonal ones on hand as well.

Pumpkin, cinnamon, and evergreen make the world a sweeter place too.

I hope you enjoy the infographic above as much as I did.

~ Joi

Infographic Credit: Holland & Barrett