Jack Black, Bluegrass Music, the Opry, and a Complete and Utter Moron

Hi there!  You know me.  I’m Joi (“Joy”), your chatty, never-runs-out-of-things-to-say blogger.  Wife of one husband and mother to three human daughters, many cat daughters, an invisible bulldog named Duchess (don’t judge me).  I love animals beyond all reason.

I possess a happy addiction to coffee, tea, chai tea lattes, and chocolate.

I love cooking, gardening, and history.  I don’t subscribe to the theory that a day spent without laughing is a waste of time – I subscribe to the theory that even an hour spent without laughing is a waste of time.  Love to laugh.  Love to talk.

Oh!  Oh, yeah. And I am a complete and utter moron.

Get this.  My favorite comedic actor is Jack Black.  Love myself some Jack Black.  I collect his movies and devour every interview and article about him.   He’s one of my absolute favorite entertainers of all time.  In the section of my brain that houses the faces of my favorite stars – Mr. Jack Black can be found raising a ruckus alongside Lucille Ball, Audrey Hepburn, Johnny Depp, Richard Pryor, Angelina Jolie,  Steve Carrell, Clint Eastwood,  Julia Roberts, Bruce Willis, Robin Williams, Billy Bob Thornton, Robert Downey Jr…..

Hmmm, I’m bent toward colorful plumage, am I not? I’ve always been drawn to people who live out loud.  They may not make the world go round, but they make the ride funner.

Jack Black makes me laugh inside out and I think he’s an amazingly talented actor.  He’s one of those stars who, when all’s said and done, will be as big as he wants to be.  Yes, indeed, card carrying Jack Black fanatic right here.

Soooo.  You see. It goes like this.  Jack Black’s beautiful wife, Tonya, is part of a ridiculously talented musical family, The Hadens. (You HAVE to search them out  on YouTube – Charlie, Tonya, Rachel, Petra and Josh Haden. I could’ve listened to them for two forevers.)  When it was announced that Jack Black would be making an appearance at the Grand Ole Opry with them, my wonderful husband bought us tickets and I started counting the days.

We’ve been to  quite a few of these shows, and I always, always take my camera.  I’ve gotten wonderful pictures of Carrie Underwood, Martina McBride, Julianne Hough, Montgomery Gentry, The Oak Ridge Boys, Lori Morgan, Pam Tillis, Charlie Pride, Whispering Bill Anderson…   The list (and the sequins) go on and on.

However, on the night we went to see Jack Black, my favorite comedic actor, I was entirely too clever to remember the camera.  Went right out the door without it and never even thought about it until we were in our chairs discussing the night’s line up with the people around us.  People were asking who all was going to be on stage that night, why Vince Gill was unable to make it, and all of that pre-show blah blah blah.

I just kept thinking, “People. It doesn’t matter.  Jack Black is here.  Kung Fu Panda.  King Kong. School of Rock.  Tenacious D.  Ice Age. Just sit there and wait for Jack.”

But, dumb as it was, it wasn’t leaving the camera behind that earned me the honor of  being a complete and utter moron.   No, no, no.  Wait for it – I topped myself.

After the show, my husband took what was left of my deliriously happy body to a pizza restaurant.  I think I may have even eaten a piece. I put my winter coat on, pulled up the hood and we headed back into the cold night to walk to the parking garage.  I’m shuffling along, freezing but happy when I see a group of people coming toward us.  I lock eyes with none other than Jack Black as they pass right beside us.

My mouth opened but not a single sound came out!   Madame Motormouth – turned into Madame Mute in a Nashville minute.

My husband said, “Hey, Jack!” and Jack spoke back, very friendly and smiling.  The husband tells them what a great show they put on and Jack graciously thanks him.  I. Couldn’t. Speak. A. Word.  I had Laryngitis once and made more noise.  You’d think I could have said, “Hi!” or how about “Great show!”

When we walked about 10 to 20 feet in the opposite direction from them, “Skadoosh” (His Kung Fu Panda character’s famous line.) quietly came out of my mouth.  My husband said, “It’s too late now!”

Later, when I had to replay the scene for my daughters and their boyfriends, I told them that all I could think was,  “Hey! You’re not fat!”

They all agreed it’s just as well nothing came out at all.

If you ever pass by a favorite star, I hope you can at least summon up a “Hi!”

~ Joi