• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

Self Help Daily

Inspirational and Self Help Blog with a Save the World Complex...

  • Home
    • Tour Self Help Daily
    • Self Help Daily’s Archives
    • Privacy
      • Affiliate Disclosure
  • Contact
  • Inspirational Quotes
  • Self Help
    • Positive Thought
    • Health
    • Mental Fitness
    • Relationships
    • Self Growth
    • How to Be Happy
  • Book Reviews
You are here: Home / Self Help / Relationships / Language of Love

Language of Love

March 26, 2006 by Joi Leave a Comment

Book links are usually affiliate links. This means I earn a small percentage when you click through and buy the book. This costs you nothing extra - it simply allows me to keep my cats in the lifestyle they're accustomed to.

The past week was the worst one I’ve ever lived through, and it will forever be a prayer of mine to never encounter a worst one.

One week ago today I found out that my mom had died.  You always look for “blessings” in these things.  It’s as though the mind says, “Hey, you can handle this.  After all, she isn’t sick anymore….She died in her sleep…..She’s with her own mom and with Daddy now…”  All of the thoughts are comforting to an extent.  The same way Neosporin and a Band-Aid are comforting to a cut.  It covers it up a bit, making it more tolerable – but it doesn’t heal the wound and it most definitely doesn’t make the pain go away.

This post will have no rhythm or rhyme to it because I have no rhythm or rhyme to me right now.

At all.

I remember when I lost my dad, 11 years ago, it took a while for the darkness to let up – the light was finally switched back on in my life, but certainly not right away.  I realize more and more each day how incredibly young my father was when he died – only 54.  My mom wasn’t much older than that.  When they say, “You never know…,” they‘re painfully right.

In the coming week I’ll post about different things I learned from my mother, as well as different things I heard about her this week.

I believe each family has its own language of love.  Some families – like me, my girls and husband say “I love you” everyday – when getting off the phone, when someone leaves for work, at bedtime, etc.  We’re mushy, I guess.  When my girls were little, they were like little dolls to me and I just said the words automatically each time I looked at them.

And some things never change.

My mom and dad’s families were different, so were my husband’s.  The love was still there, make no mistake about it – it was just said and shown in different ways.  Rather than a big hug topped off with a peck to the cheek and an “I love you”, a pat on the back was often the message in full.  When my dad would bring home the newest Shaun Cassidy poster and come into my room with “something” behind his back, that was his “I love you!”  I knew it then and I know it now.  And when I’d watch a western with him (some for, like the 500th time), and act like it was the most interesting and fascinating entertainment in the world, that was my, “I love you, dad and you’re a lot of fun to hang with.”

My mom and I weren’t as touchy, feely as my daughters and I are – because that’s how she was raised.  If great big hugs were given out in her family people would wonder what someone had done wrong.  Love and affection were simply shown in different ways.  One of the main ways was always being there when they were needed…. always lending an ear and a shoulder.

Always being there – like it was second nature.

When my daughters came along, everyone got a lot more touchy feely – something about adorable, soft little babies that turns everyone into hugging, cuddling, cheek kissing machines!

There is no ONE language of love.  I guess that’s what I’m attempting to get at.  So, whatever your family’s language of love is, I’m just encouraging you to speak it and speak it often.  If it’s taking a deli-bought or homemade cake by to a loved one, or sitting and listening (really listening) to their stories, even when they’ve hit syndication – just do it.  Make it a point to touch each person as often as you can, and never wait for “tomorrow” to say or do anything.

We aren’t guaranteed any tomorrows.

My mom sounded and felt wonderful on Saturday afternoon, but when she went to bed Saturday night, with her much beloved dog by her side, she never opened her eyes again. Not on earth, anyway.

Ironically, the night before she died, she was even fussing a little about her house – not enough closet space, counter space, or cabinets.  She said that this year she WOULD be moving into a larger house.  I told her, “Okay, if that’s what you want...”

Little did we know then the larger house she’d be moving into.

MAKE.  EACH.  MOMENT.  COUNT.
~Joi

Filed Under: Relationships, Spiritual

Previous Post: « Beautiful Quote About Books
Next Post: Time Management Tips That Actually Make Sense »

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Primary Sidebar

Self Help Blog

Cat on Pine Mountain , Kentucky

Welcome to Self Help Daily, a blog devoted to helping you get the most from life by getting the most from yourself!

Read the story behind the picture above in How to Live in the Moment.

Positive Affirmation Cards


Positive Affirmation Cards (Amazon)

Contact Joi

My name is Joi (“Joy”)! I am the animal lover behind Self Help Daily.

To contact me, please do so through e-mail (joitsigers @ gmail.com). Thanks and I look forward to hearing from you! ~ Joi

Self Help Blog Updates

  • Learn to Enjoy Each Stage of Your Life
  • The First-Time Pet Owners Guide to Choosing a Dog Breed
  • Finding More Time for Reading in a Ridiculously Busy Day!
  • The – Almost – Lost Art of Greeting Cards: A History of Sentimentality 
  • Top Tips to Avoid Catching Winter Bugs
  • Remember How Free it Felt to Be a Kid? Yeah… Let’s Tap Back into That!
  • Always Have an Attitude of Gratitude ~ Sterling K. Brown
  • Managing Bladder Inconsistency in the Elderly

Featured Quote Graphics

Don't Quit Quote Graphic

Dr. Seuss Quote About Being Who You Are

Booker T. Washington Quote About Hate

Wayne Dyer Quote About Karma

Quote About Habits

Footer

Inspirational Quotes

  • Abraham Lincoln Quotes
  • Billy Graham Quotes
  • Booker T. Washington Quotes
  • Dale Carnegie Quotes
  • Maya Angelou Quotes
  • Mark Twain Quotes
  • Martin Luther King, Jr. Quotes
  • Norman Vincent Peale Quotes

More Inspirational Quotes

❖ Self Help Daily Updates



Overcoming Empty Nest Syndrome

One of the questions I hear the most from my readers is, "How can I cope with empty nest syndrome?" I'll try to deal with this sensitive subject as often as possible. If you have any suggestions, I hope you'll contribute to the conversations!

  • Coping With Empty Nest Syndrome
  • Don't Just Cope in an Empty Nest, Thrive!
  • How to Be Happy in an Empty Nest
  • Overcoming Empty Nest Syndrome
Copyright Self Help Daily 2023