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Relationships

The – Almost – Lost Art of Greeting Cards: A History of Sentimentality 

December 24, 2022 by Joi Leave a Comment

Stay in Contact with Loved Ones with Greeting Cards

 

At one time, greeting cards were commonplace; they were a great way to communicate with acquaintances, friends and family and let them know that you are thinking of them for whatever reason. Nowadays, the use of greeting cards seems to be on the decline, which is a shame. In order to understand this custom and the importance that it holds, you need to go back to the start. Read on to learn more about the history of greeting cards. 

The Origins

In truth, the origin of greeting cards as they appear today is difficult to pinpoint. This is because passing written sentiments to one another can be traced back to the invention of writing. Archaeologists have discovered clay tablets dating back to the Sumerian culture sometime between 3000 and 2000 BC, with what is thought to be words of greeting inscribed upon them. 

There is also similar evidence of well-wishing in ancient Egypt and bronze-age China. The personalized messages were sent with the intention of imparting good luck upon the recipient for the new year and warding off evil spirits. This tradition is still an important part of the Chinese New Year celebrations. 

In Egypt, on the other hand, there further evidence of personalization’s in these greetings. There are named individuals sending their well wishes to other named individuals. However, in contrast to the Chinese tradition, these well wishes do not appear to be designed to ward off evil but simply celebrate the new year. 

The Invention of Paper

Paper was invented around 100 AD in China, and it became the medium of choice for personalized messages as its use travelled along the Silk Road to other cultures. Its use around the New Year continued. This is because, in western cultures, it was used to offer well wishes and good luck for the upcoming harvest year. 

Presents sometimes accompanied the paper in the form of wood carvings or other small handmade trinkets. It was only really around the 14th century in Germany when the first iterations of what society today would recognize as greeting cards were found; they were still solely for the new year. However, at this time, they were reserved almost exclusively for upper classes thanks to their price. 

Greeting Cards & National Holidays

It was then during the 15th century that greeting cards began to diversify. Instead of being limited to well wishes for the new year, they began to be exchanged for other reasons and during other periods. One of the first being the celebration of the feast of St. Valentine. In fact, one of the cards given during this period is considered the oldest Valentine’s love letter written; it was from a woman named Margery Brews to her fiancé in the year 1477.

Despite the fact that greeting cards were diversifying in their purpose and occasion, they were still rather inaccessible to the layperson because of their expense. They were created in low numbers to accommodate this, not like the mass production of greeting cards seen today. They only began to see a rise in their numbers during the mid-19th century. This is simply because the process was mechanized, which made it easier to produce large numbers of greeting cards. 

The mass production of greeting cards came at just the right time. During the same period, postal routes were improved, and postal rates became more affordable, which helped to make the whole sending greeting cards thing more accessible to all members of society. They also continued to vary their use, with cards being produced for a number of occasions. 

The cards themselves also seemed to become more and more elaborately decorated too. Designers were hired to create artwork specifically for the greeting cards. The cards mostly focused on Christmas and the New Year, although Valentine’s cards were still popular too. A lot of greeting card companies began to invest more in the design of their cards. By the 1870s, however, greeting cards encompassed all of the classic holidays that they do today. 

Greetings Cards Today

Between then and now, there has been very little evolution in the industry. There are now more cards than ever that can be sent for any number of reasons, but the buying and sending process remains largely unchanged. One of the biggest greeting card companies in the world was formed in 1910 in Kansas City, America. 

Hallmark today is synonymous with holidays like Christmas. The business prides itself on being wholesome and family-orientated, and thanks to its success, they have diversified beyond greetings cards, having their own television channel and creating movies and generating other content and products. 

However, in recent years, the purchase of greetings cards from traditional retailers has seen a steady decline. The younger generations today seem to be far less interested in sending greeting cards in the traditional manner; the question is, why? Do the younger generations not have the same soft spot for sentimentality?

Truthfully, the rise of the digital era has a lot to answer for in terms of the traditional approach to greeting cards declining. Firstly, social media and mobile phones have meant that you can get in contact with a person directly to deliver your well wishes as opposed to the past when letter writing was the primary form of communication. Today you can reach out directly, which somewhat negates the need for greetings cards. 

There are obviously still young people today who enjoy the sentimentality of sending cards and respect the tradition. However, they don’t tend to approach it in the same way. There are a number of companies today that allow you to choose a card design and fully customize it to your specifications. The company then also sends out the card on your behalf. 

This is perhaps the biggest difference; people today are sending cards without ever having had them in their physical possession first. Cards today are often sent via these companies that act like a proxy. Some people could be under the impression that this adds extra unnecessary steps. But this isn’t the case. 

Ordering, writing out and sending a card online can be done in just a few steps. The convenience is unparalleled. These sites also offer help and advice too. For example, Greenvelope can be used to send the cards themselves, but they also have a number of resources, including tips on what you should write whether you are sending a speedy recovery card, a condolence card or whatever the occasion may be.

Lastly, in addition to being able to send physical cards via the internet, there has also been a rise in the use of e-cards. These cards exist solely in the digital landscape. They can be sent via email or other digital platforms. They were preferred for a while, but they can feel a little more impersonal, and they don’t allow for keepsakes, either.

In Conclusion

Expressing well wishes and giving greetings to friends and family has always been done in one form or another; originally, it was passed along verbally. Then with the invention of writing, it was done this way, regardless of whether you believe that expressing well wishes can help to ward off evil spirits or you simply want to express a sentiment. A greeting card can be an excellent way to do it. The tradition continues to endure; it is simply done in a different way.

Filed Under: Articles by Various Authors, General, Positive Thought, Relationships Tagged With: Relationships

Positive Feedback vs. Negative Feedback and the Effect Each Has on Our Lives

June 21, 2021 by Joi 5 Comments

Quote About Being Yourself

I’m about halfway through a wonderful book, How to Think Like a Millionaire (I hope to have the review up soon!).  It’s one of those books where you find yourself, not only taking notes, but closing the book every now and again just to let everything soak in.  After this morning’s reading, I was basically a sponge.

I just finished a section on Positive Feedback vs Negative Feedback and the impact they have upon our subconscious mind and the absolute power our subconscious mind has over our lives.  Everything rises and falls according to the strength of our subconscious mind, so keeping positive and life-affirming thoughts therein could make ALL the difference.

The Live-Changing Power of Positive Feedback

When I got up from reading to make my husband breakfast, I was still thinking about what I had read.  I realized how, in my own life, positive feedback had a huge impact on me.  My mom and dad were forever telling me what a “good” child I was, how they never had to worry about me getting into trouble, and so on.  That early reinforcement, I’m sure, had a great deal to do with the fact that I never DID get into any trouble.  When I was in my 30’s, a few months before I lost my father – my dad told one of his nurses that the only trouble I ever gave him or my mom was one solitary speeding ticket.

I told him at the time that it was because I was perfect – but I’m absolutely sure that’s not completely honest!

I believe that the same scenario plays out for kids who are constantly told that they’re “bad,” “difficult,” or “spoiled.”  They live down to those words the way the lucky kids live up to the ones they hear.

As I kept thinking, I realized another area where positive feedback affected me greatly.  I believe that one of the reasons I ever fancied myself a writer had to do with things my aunt told me years and years ago.  Penny (my mom’s sister and an aunt I’ve always been VERY close to) and her husband (Bobby – LOVE him too!) had to move to another state when I was really young.  It was really hard on all of us, but Bobby had an amazing offer in Ohio that he would have been a fool to say no to.  He’s the master of corny jokes, but a fool he’s not.

When they left, I missed them terribly, so we started writing a lot of letters to one another – oh, to have had e-mail and social media back then!  When they came home for Christmas, she went on and on about how much my letters meant to her and Bobby.  She said she always looked forward to them and saved each one.  When she said they “made her smile” because they were like visiting with me, I began to associate true, beautiful power with words.

Many years later, when I got married and we had to move to Kansas, I had a lot more letters to write.  I still wrote to Penny, but I also wrote to my parents and my grandmother.  Each one of them always told me how much they loved reading my letters, how they kept them and often re-read them.  My grandmother even told me how she read them to her friends, and that they enjoyed my “way with words.”

Positive Feedback, friends.

Somewhere along the way, I came to believe that all of my loved ones were right and I’ve had a fascination with words and writing since.

When I handed my smiling husband his breakfast, I thought of yet another area of positive feedback touching my life. Early in my marriage, I fell head over heels in love with cooking.  I started collecting cookbooks and even began coming up with my own recipes.  He’d often have his single friends over to our house for supper.  I often overheard him talking about my “wonderful” cooking and it made me believe I was the greatest cook in the world.  The fact that he and our daughters are always so complimentary about my meals, desserts, bread, etc. only makes me love cooking more and more.

I am very, very blessed that the people I love most in this world have always made me feel like I could do anything. It makes me very sad to think there are others out there who don’t have this positive feedback in their life.

A Lack of Positive Feedback

I wonder if one of the main reasons people become discouraged and give up is because they don’t get enough positive feedback. Think about the stereotypical scenario of the couple who has been together for several years. She begins to feel he doesn’t love her or think she’s pretty simply because he has stopped saying the words. The positive feedback, early in the relationship, built her confidence up SO high that when the words stopped, she came crashing down, bewildered and even wondering what she’s doing wrong.

The same could be said of children, co-workers, and just about anyone you could name. Children often give up because they don’t feel appreciated. Co-workers and friends get to the point that they quit trying because nothing they do is ever good enough.

The Pitfalls of Negative Feedback

The only thing more dangerous than a lack of positive feedback is a steady stream of negative feedback. When a spouse, daughter, son, friend, co-worker, etc. only hears negative comments – they begin to believe the words and come to believe that they are as worthless as the comments say they are. Many even tune the negativity out to a certain degree, after all, who wants to constantly hear how worthless, stupid, wrong, irresponsible, or bad they are?!?! But it goes much deeper than them tuning it out. They begin to believe it. When someone believes the worst about themselves, they stop even trying.

However, if they get positive feedback – even if it’s for the smallest possible thing – their confidence and self worth begin to grow. After they’ve gotten enough positive feedback, they begin to give themselves MORE of the same feedback, then… look out!

The Most Important Feedback of All

As important as the feedback we get from others is, it’s not the most vital feedback. That feedback is the one we feed ourselves. The words we say to ourselves, usually inside our own minds, determine how successful we will or will not be. We are, basically, what we think we are.

The words below are just some of the words we use to cripple ourselves:

  • I’m too old
  • I’m too fat
  • I’m not smart enough
  • I never catch any breaks
  • I don’t have enough money
  • Nobody loves me
  • I’m lonely
  • I can’t do anything
  • I’m so depressed
  • I am so sick and tired of…
  • My live sucks!

When we feed ourselves words like this, we’re feeding ourselves a type of poison. Anyone who feeds these words to another person (especially someone they supposedly love) should be even more ashamed.

Start thinking more about the feedback you give to others and to yourself.  The words you say to and about the people around you makes them better or makes them worse.  If you beat them down, that’s where they’ll stay.  If you build them up, that’s the direction in which they’ll grow.

Now let’s change the pronouns a little:  If you beat yourself down, that’s where you’ll stay.  If you build yourself up, that’s the direction in which you’ll grow.  How far can you and I grow?  As far as we want to!

How to Think Like a Millionaire

The book below, How to Think Like a Millionaire is a must-read as far as I’m concerned. It’s all about altering your mindset – the millionaire part has absolutely nothing to do with it. What matters is believing that you deserved the best from life… because you absolutely do.


Filed Under: Books I Love, General, Helping Children, Relationships, Self Help Tagged With: affirmations, getting along with co-workers, motivational writing, negative feedback, parenting, positive affirmations, positive feedback, Relationships, self growth, Self Help, self help article, self help blog, self worth

Meet Stanley the Cat

September 27, 2018 by Joi Leave a Comment

I just wrote a book review on my cat blog and I wanted to share the book with you as well. (You can click through the link to learn more about this delightful book.)

Lessons from Stanley the Cat: Nine Lives of Everyday Wisdom is the little book in question. Basically, this book is a loving tribute to the author’s cat, Stanley, served up with endless warm humor and love.

You might think this wouldn’t be a “fit” for Self Help Daily, but – to be fair – you aren’t familiar with Stanley yet.

This book is a clever collection of lessons we can learn from cats. As a cat lover who has been surrounded by incredible cats her entire life, even I never fully realized all they have to teach us!

Below is one of my favorite “lessons.”

Do not be intimidated by bigger people or creatures. Be amused by them, and let them know that your curiosity is more powerful than their size.

People who carry big sticks and stomp loudly are usually trying to cover up for some major sense of inadequacy. You are not your physical size; you are the size of your character. When you are around people or creatures that make a huge point of demonstrating their physical proportions or material largesse, simply be entertained or even amused by their exaggerated performance.

If you can enjoy their inflated self-importance, they will probably relax because you are accepting them and making them feel secure. Then you might get a word in edgewise. – Page 35, Lessons from Stanley the Cat: Nine Lives of Everyday Wisdom

I love the way the author (Jennifer Freed) words that: “physical proportions or material largesse.”  So many people do love to try to lord over others by emphasizing the size of their body or bank account. While they can drive you crazy and sometimes make your blood boil, she and Stanley make an excellent point.  What if they emphasize these traits so strongly – and often exaggerate them – because they fear that it’s all they’ve got?!

The book is filled with wisdom like this, accompanied by some of the most adorable illustrations you’ve ever seen in a book. I highly recommend this one. HIGHLY!

Seduction is just the practice of artful stretching.
Never let people know how fast you are. Appear slow in all things, and less is expected of you. When someone is on the computer too long, help them by distracting them, or walk lightly on their keyboard.

So advises Stanley, a remarkably astute cat with a keen eye for the important things in life. Perhaps you don’t have time for yoga, can’t afford therapy, or wouldn’t dare cry to mother. If so, let Stanley be your guide. Lessons from Stanley the Cat offers wise and witty maxims from Stanley himself, translated by his doting psychotherapist (human) parent, Jennifer Freed. Whether you’re a cat lover or prefer companions of the canine variety, Stanley’s warmth and insight are sure to brighten even the grayest days.

Lessons from Stanley the Cat: Nine Lives of Everyday Wisdom would make a perfect gift for cat lovers in your life.  It’s a very, very fun little book and surprisingly insightful.

Then again, how could it not be? It’s Stanley after all – he’s the cat’s meow.

Filed Under: Books I Love, Relationships Tagged With: Book Reviews, books, cats, Relationships

Happy Families Don’t Just Happen

July 15, 2015 by Joi 6 Comments

Quote About Home

The One Place…

I spend a lot of time thinking about families – husbands, wives, children, parents, siblings, aunts, uncles… the whole shebang.  That’s why I made “Building Happier Families” the focus of Self Help Daily for 2015.

My family is my treasure on earth. I’d rather have this colorful cast of characters and nothing else in the world than to have everything but one less of them.

They’re crazy, but by gosh, they’re my crazies!

A family should be a safe haven, shouldn’t it? A happy band of people connected by blood as well as love. People who have one another’s backs and would go to battle for any member of the tribe.

Problem is some families spend so much time battling one another that their home and family seems like anything but a safe haven.

When I hear about broken relationships within families, my heart breaks because I know somewhere, in the middle of it all, there’s someone who cherishes their family the way I do mine – and I know that what they want more than anything else is peace and happiness.

Doesn’t seem like that much to ask for, does it?

Fortunately strained and even broken relationships can be mended. Love is a powerful force and if it’s a factor in the equation, few things are impossible.

However, the best way to REPAIR broken relationships is to PREVENT them from ever happening in the first place. Within every shattered family is at least one person who wishes with all their might that they could go back and UNdo or UNsay something.

If you’ve ever been in that agonizing position, you know that it’s very much like hell on earth.

Once you’ve wronged someone – either through action, neglect, or harmful words – you simply can’t undo it.  You can’t erase your wrong and (even worse) you can’t erase their pain.   All you can hope for is forgiveness and that, in time, the pain you see in their eyes will fade and happiness will take its place.

[shareable]Families are like fudge — mostly sweet with a few nuts. – Unknown[/shareable]

If we could all learn to control our tongues and actions, we could avoid seeing this pain in our loved ones eyes in the first place.  The problem is, the “average” person is completely and utterly ME-oriented. They live under the firm belief that the world revolves around them.

  • I want our Christmas meal at 4:00 and WILL NOT budge for anyone else.
  • I hate my daughter’s music choices, so I will berate her every chance I get.
  • My mother in law gets on my nerves and I intend to let everyone in the family know about it.
  • My son needs a haircut and I will humiliate him in front of the entire family to make my point known.
  • My wife spent too much at the store and I’m going to yell until my face turns red.
  • My husband watches too much sports on tv, but if I continually nag him, he’ll eventually watch what I want to watch.

Too many people with too many thoughts revolving around their favorite person in the world… them.  You know what these people remind me of? Pre-Schoolers.

  • I don’t want to take a nap, so I’m going to scream and cry.
  • I want to stay at the park, so I’m going to throw myself on the ground and scream my favorite word – NOOOO!
  • That’s MY toy and she can’t have it.
  • I do not want to be in this store anymore, so I’m going to cry my eyes out.
  • I don’t want this green food! I’m going to throw it on the floor!

Like children, adults make everyone around them miserable for selfish reasons.

[shareable]When you look at your life, the greatest happinesses are family happinesses. – Joyce Brothers[/shareable]

I saw a mother in Kroger recently with an adorable but obviously irritable little boy (probably around 2 years old).  The woman looked like she was walking on eggshells as she tried to hurry through the process before the little guy blew his stack.

She didn’t make it. Right as she wheeled into the checkout lane, the complete and utter mini-meltdown began. It was something to behold, too.

While he was, in spite of himself, downright cute with his red face and clinched little fists, the same CANNOT be said for adults who cause others to walk on eggshells as they hope to avoid one of their fits.

Nothing cute or adorable about them.

If you’re one of those people who, God love you, tends to think of self THEN others, I’m not asking you to change your focus. In fact, if you’re past the age of 45, it wouldn’t do any good anyway.  After all, you’ve been in the center stage of your own thoughts for a long time, I won’t try to budge you.

As they say, you do you!

What I am saying is this… Within each family there are people who are, basically, the HEART of the family. They’re the moms, dads, grandmothers, grandfathers, daughters, sons, brothers and/or sisters who just want everyone to get along, be kind, and fill the house with laughter.

These are the people who not only “don’t rock the boat,” they spend 90 percent of their time keeping things afloat.

I want you to think about them for a minute. Think of people in your family who you love completely – the ones who you would be utterly lost without.

How do you make them feel when you behave like a 2 year old in a grocery store? What happens to the smile on their faces or the joy in their eyes when you cause them to walk on eggshells?

Do you really want that?  Shouldn’t we all want to see those we love so happy that they burst out in laughter?!

I hope that if you ARE someone who tends to gravitate toward this kind of behavior you’ll recognize yourself. I  hope that next time you’ll see yourself as a little red-faced toddler and that you’ll completely change your thoughts and actions.

It’d be highly unlikely that a little child would look at his mom and think, “I love that mommy person. She is having fun in this boring, bright store. I’m tired and I miss my toys but my mommy person is happy. I can make her even more happy if I smile at her…”

Nope. That’s not going to happen. But it can.. and it should… happen with adults.  The next time you want to nag, yell, pick, complain, “make your point,” or anything else that takes place in the center stage, please take time to think about the people you love.

[shareable]Having a place to go is a home. Having someone to love is a family. Having both is a blessing. – Donna Hedges[/shareable]

Make no mistake about it, there IS someone in your life who wants one thing more than anything else in the world – peace and happiness.  Do your part and give it to them.

Imagine the look on their face when, as they’re waiting for you to justify the eggshells on the floor, you simply brush them away.

That is when magic happens.

Filed Under: Happier Families, How to Be Happy, Relationships Tagged With: happier families, how to have a happier family, Relationships

People Can’t Drive You Crazy If You Don’t Give Them the Keys (Review)

February 23, 2015 by Joi 4 Comments

Continuing the Focus of 2015: Building a Happier Family!

A while back,  I downloaded an interesting sounding e-book, People Can’t Drive You Crazy If You Don’t Give Them the Keys (Kindle edition link) by Mike Bechtle.  I fell in love with the cover image Come on, who wouldn’t be? It’s a duck. In a snazzy jacket with a whackadoodle hat.

And can we talk about the fact that he has green hair?

The title is, to be honest, what initially caught my eye. Even before the duck. The title reminds me of a something I always said to my three daughters while they were growing up. I don’t know about where you live, but in Kentucky we have a popular saying, “He’s getting my goat…” or “That really gets my goat..”

With three little girls, I often heard, “She just gets my goat…” In one of our infamous, “table talks,” I told my girls, “People can only get your goat if you put it out in the open. If they know where your goat is, it’s easy pickings.”

The title of this book just kind of reminded me of homespun wisdom and it had me at “crazy.”

When doing book reviews, as I often point out, I want to give a great “feel” for the book without giving the entire premise away. If I were to lay out all the brilliance of a particular book right here, why would you need to read it for yourself?

Since I VERY much want everyone to read People Can’t Drive You Crazy If You Don’t Give Them the Keys (paperback link) as soon as they humanly can, I’m going to tread lightly.  I hope you’ll stick with this book review, even if it gets lengthy – this book is extra special.

As we continue the focus of 2015 on Self Help Daily, Building a Happier Family, I have to strongly suggest everyone read this book. If you are a really, really busy individual, and simply don’t have time to devote 30 minutes to an hour reading each day, I have a few solutions…

  • People Can’t Drive You Crazy if You Don’t Give Them the Keys (CD)
    or…
  • People Can’t Drive You Crazy If You Don’t Give Them the Keys (Audible Audio)

A reaction is how we feel; a response is what we do. Reactions are automatic, but we choose our responses. – Mike Bechtle, People Can’t Drive You Crazy if You Don’t Give Them the Keys

Like most books, this particular WINNER is available in a variety of formats, so there’s simply no reason NOT to make this the next book you read… even if you read it with your ears.

The beauty of People Can’t Drive You Crazy If You Don’t Give Them the Keys (as it relates to building a happier family) is that it gives you the motivation, information, and inspiration you need to do your part to make your family the happiest family in town.  This book is, also, ideal reading for anyone who’s looking to improve their relationships at work or school (or anywhere for that matter) – but since our focus is on families… we’ll just stay seated around the dining room table rather than a board room table.

The food’s better anyway.

As I said, I read People Can’t Drive You Crazy if You Don’t Give Them the Keys on my iPad – so I couldn’t highlight or underline extra-insightful and/or humorous quotes and paragraphs. I could, however, write them down – and I did just that. You never saw so many notes and notations!

…. Your emotions got the best of you, and your crazy person has you dangling in her grip like a bungee jump gone bad….  Mike Bechtle, People Can’t Drive You Crazy if You Don’t Give Them the Keys

True story: One night a History Channel show that my husband and I wouldn’t miss for a million dollars had just gone off.  I knew I had about 15 minutes to read a little something before bedtime, so I grabbed my iPad to read from one of my e-books. I flew past PCDYCIFDGTTK (looks like a cat just walked across the keyboard, doesn’t it?) and chose an Agatha Christie mystery I was in the middle of. Why? I didn’t have my pen and notebook with me and I knew that even just 15 minutes with PCDYCIFDGTTK would have produced more than a few note-worthy points.

It’s that good.

For one thing, People Can’t Drive You Crazy if You Don’t Give Them the Keys is a very enjoyable and entertaining read. The author is absolutely hilarious. I’ve read that he’s a popular speaker and I can absolutely see why. GREAT sense of humor.  The sense of humor and warm stories about his own family and friends (including precious granddaughters) make for a very, very special book.

A certain passage about the author’s oldest granddaughter reminded me so much of my oldest daughter (Emily) that it’s beyond uncanny.  I was delighted –  the world can never have too many colorful, detail-oriented, little girls who march to the beat of their own drum. They grow up to be colorful, detail-oriented young women who just keep on marching.

People Can’t.. is also a really “fast reading” book.  When you aren’t taking notes, that is.

A lot of self help or self improvement books are good, while you’re reading them, but fail to “stick.”  This is not one of those books. It’s fantastic while you’re in the middle of it, and it sticks like super glue.

History brings us to where we are right now, but it doesn’t have to dictate how we respond in the future. – Mike Bechtle, People Can’t Drive You Crazy if You Don’t Give Them the Keys

I will, in the foreseeable future often quote or refer back to this wonderful book. However, I have to give you one of the most profound messages or points from the author and his wonderful book.

Ever read a quote or a passage that is so profound and packs such a wallop that you go back and re-read it… allowing it to wallop you from the other side? Early in the book, Mike Bechtle hits the nail on the head when he says, “Never allow yourself to become a victim of anyone else’s shortcomings or weaknesses.”

I read a lot.  A LOT. But it has been ages since a single cluster of words had such an impact on me. When we allow others to impact our peacefulness or happiness, we become their victim. This could be anyone..

  • rude servers
  • inefficient store clerks
  • family members
  • co-workers
  • friends
  • toxic people online…. I’m looking at you social media…

…. anyone, anywhere, anytime. If we allow them to remove us from where we want to be —- content, peaceful, happy —- and place us anywhere else, we are at their mercy. Worse, we are their victim.

I guess I’d just never thought of it that way before. Since reading (and re-reading) the words, however, I’ve thought about it plenty!  There are a lot of jackals in this world, after all.  Not one has victimized me since.

Not even vile online toxicity rattles my cage anymore.  If I see someone being a complete jackal, I just thank God that it isn’t my jackal and go about my business.

Book Synopsis: Strange as it may seem, other people are not nearly as committed to our happiness as we are. In fact, sometimes they seem like they’re on a mission to make us miserable! There’s always that one person. The one who hijacks your emotions and makes you crazy. The one who seems to thrive on drama. If you could just FIX that person, everything would be better. But we can’t fix other people – we can only make choices about ourselves. In this cut-to-the-chase book, communication expert Mike Bechtle shows readers that they don’t have to be victims of other people’s craziness.

With commonsense wisdom and practical advice that can be implemented immediately, Bechtle gives readers a proven strategy to handle crazy people.

More than just offering a set of techniques, Bechtle offers a new perspective that will change readers’ lives as they deal with those difficult people who just won’t go away.

How Can People Can’t Drive You Crazy If You Don’t Give Them the Keys help You?

Let’s get right down to it, want to? Why should you get your hands, eyes, and possibly ears on this book as soon as possible?

Because you deserve to be happy. Simple as that.

Yes, reading this book can help you keep peace within your family. Yes, the author’s wonderful advice can help you get along with even the craziest of the crazies, at work or home.  Yes, if you read this book and allow it to sink in, you can have the kind of peaceful, happy family holidays you see in tv commercials.

But, just for a minute, don’t think about any of that. Just for a minute, put everyone and everything else out of your mind and only think about yourself. It isn’t easy to live in a world of crazies – they’re everywhere, after all.  They can, and will, leave their footprints on your psyche. You’ll find yourself coming unglued, sighing deeply, whining, crying, and arguing with people over the silliest things. If it continues, you may even find yourself unable to sleep or unwind as well as you once did and your health can (and will) pay for the turmoil.

A lack of harmony in your life and an inability to “deal” with the handiwork of a crazy person can affect every corner of your life.

This book will help you clean out those corners. You’ll be happier and, as a result, everyone around you will be happier.

Think about it – if you feel tension in your family or at work, everyone feels it.  A tense individual in a room is like a caged tiger. Everyone focuses on the show, holding their breath waiting for the roar.

If you aren’t handling your crazy person (or crazy people, if you’re an over-achiever) well, you’re making everyone around you tense, unhappy, and downright miserable. Whether you encounter your crazies at work or home, you will be happier when you know how to cope with them.

You know I always level with my readers – and I’m telling you right now, this is a book you have to read.  This one’s a life-changer. ~ Joi

  • People Can’t Drive You Crazy If You Don’t Give Them the Keys (paperback link)
  • People Can’t Drive You Crazy If You Don’t Give Them the Keys (Kindle edition link)
  • People Can’t Drive You Crazy if You Don’t Give Them the Keys (CD)
  • People Can’t Drive You Crazy If You Don’t Give Them the Keys (Audible Audio)

 “Never allow yourself to become a victim of anyone else’s shortcomings or weaknesses.” – Mike Bechtle

Filed Under: Book Reviews, Books I Love, Happier Families Tagged With: Book Reviews, happier families, happiness, Relationships

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