Arthritis is one of the most painful conditions an individual can live with.  Unfortunately our risk of learning this truth firsthand increases with age.  Fortunately, as with a lot of diseases, there are certain things we can do and certain things we can avoid to keep ourselves off of the arthritis radar.

  1. Drink your orange juice. Studies show that the antioxidants found in citrus fruit greatly reduce our odds of developing arthritis.
  2. Got milk? You should.  Calcium should be a part of your daily diet, especially if staying out of arthritis’ path is high on your “must do” list.  Drink milk and enjoy yogurt, cheese, and other dairy products.   If you are lactose intolerant (such as moi), remember that salmon and broccoli are sources of calcium.
  3. Watch your weight. Extra weight puts pressure on your joints and, when trying to hide from arthritis, you certainly don’t want to stress out your joints.  Just add arthritis to the list of diseases and ailments that can be discouraged by maintaining a healthy weight.  I read somewhere that if you lose 12 pounds, you cut your risk for developing arthritis in half.
  4. Stay active. Inactivity is a dangerous thing – for the body as well as the mind.  Brisk daily walks, strength – training, pilates, swimming, tennis, or yoga are excellent ways to keep your body active.  They’ll also help you with #3.  Stretching exercises and swimming are two of the best ways to keep your joints happy and stress-free and your muscles in top working condition.  Try to get at least 30 minutes of activity daily.  Exercise builds your muscles and your muscles support your joints.  See the connection? Weak muscles don’t offer the support your joints need but strong muscles will keep them honest.
  5. Use common sense. When home, at work, or at play, pay closer attention to what you put your joints through.  Find ways to lessen lifting and carrying activities.  Avoid things that put excess stress on your hips and knees.  Also, take extra care when playing sports.  Never put yourself at risk for injuries and remember to warm up before an activity and cool down afterward.
  6. Quit smoking. As if there aren’t enough reasons, already, to quit a habit that’s so bad for you! Cigarette – smoking is a habit that’s bad for you in every way conceivable.  It weakens your immune system and compromises your overall health. People who smoke cigarettes even age faster than others.
  7. Wear comfortable shoes. Never compromise your feet for stylish shoes.  Be certain that your shoes are the size you need and make sure they’re padded.  Neglected feet can cause a whole world of problems and none of them are pretty.
  8. Don’t sit still for long periods of time. If you have a desk job (or you simply enjoy sitting a great deal!), make it a point to get up and stretch periodically.  Using gentle movements, stretch all of your muscles to keep them nice and limber.  As an extra bonus, stretching will make you feel better.  It’ll also help you stay more alert.
  9. Try to avoid repetitive motions. If your job calls for you to make repetitive motions on a consistent basis, make it a point to find ways to take some of the pressure off of your joints.  Always remember:  When it comes to preventing arthritis, you want to keep your joints as stress free as possible.
  10. Take fish oil supplements.  Add preventing arthritis to the long list of benefits of taking daily fish oil supplements.
  11. Practice good posture. Sit up straight and walk tall.  Keep your back straight and your abs pulled in.
  12. Sleep on a firm mattress. Again, it’s all about supporting your joints and keeping them happy.
  13. Drink plenty of water. Water is necessary for joint lubrication.  It’ll also help with weight maintenance.  Think of drinking water as ridding your body of toxins – after all, that’s exactly what you’re doing.
  14. Get plenty of rest and relaxation. If you’re tired or run down, you’ll increase your risks of harming your muscles or other parts of your body.  Be sure to get plenty of sleep AND be sure to take breaks during the day.
  15. Be informed. I can’t possibly tell you how important it is to stay on top of information and news – especially health news.  Read, read, read, read.  Then read some more.  Stay current with health issues and advice from reputable doctors and other experts in the health field.
  16. Bundle up in cold weather. If it’s cold outside, don’t be a hero – dress warmly. Keep your joints warm and protected from the frigid cold.  Be extra thoughtful and considerate of your hands and protect them with a great pair of gloves.  Think of all your hands do for you – protect them and keep them safe.  Also, keep your poor knees in mind!  Wear thick pants or even long underwear.  As for your feet (also pretty important, right?) wear thick, appropriate socks and waterproof footwear.
  17. Use Heat Therapy. When you’re feeling achy and kind of stiff, take a warm bath or a warm shower or snuggle up with a heating pad.  Heat therapy soothes and relaxes over-worked muscles and joints.
  18. Learn relaxation techniques. Not only should you get plenty of sleep and rest, you should become a master of relaxation techniques.  Tense muscles cause joints to become stressed and, as we’ve already determined, we want our joints to be as stress free as a trophy wife.
  19. Don’t carry extra burdens. No, I’m not talking about worries this time – I’m talking about literally carrying extra burdens.  If you can pull it or push it, don’t lift it.  Also, use wheelbarrows, wagons, or other useful tools to do the hard work for you.  Don’t exert undo pressure on your joints.
  20. Consider Cod liver oil and Vitamin E.  Each of these reduce inflammation in the body.  Experts tell us that eating fruits and vegetables each day also reduce inflammation.
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“TRULY, thoughts are things, and powerful things at that, when they are mixed with definiteness of purpose, persistence, and a BURNING DESIRE for their translation into riches, or other material objects.” – Napoleon Hill

Ever wonder why so many self help experts, motivational speakers, and inspirational authors spend so much time on the subject of thoughts?  The answer’s pretty easy:  That’s where everything originates.  The good, the bad, the ugly.  Your thoughts are basically the foundation of your life.  Everything is built upon them.

They’re that important.

The downside of the importance of thoughts? Your thoughts can be your undoing.  You can have everything in the world going for you but lack the ability to harness your think tank and make it work for you.  A talented, beautiful, charismatic person without the ability to think positively and proactively may as well be a prairie chicken.

The upside of the importance of thoughts? They can carry you further than your natural abilities and attributes could ever take you on their own. Here’s an illustration.  Have you ever seen someone who, if you had to be honest, was kind of on the unattractive side.  But their confidence – based upon the image of themselves they apparently held in their mind – made them downright gorgeous?!?  I knew a woman like that once.  When I first saw her, I thought, “Bless your heart…” (It’s a Southern thing, we’re always on the lookout to bless someone’s heart.)  But after I met her and spent a little time with her I was certain she should run for the title of Mrs. America.

Nature had given her face a Homer Simpson face, but she was convinced she was rocking a Jessica Simpson face.  Her confidence and mannerisms actually made her as lovely as Jessica.  From Homer to Jessica… now that’s what I call a makeover.  And it all began in her mind.

Build within your mind a strong image of the person you want to be:  Physically, mentally, emotionally, financially, and spiritually.  Don’t take this imagery lightly and never, ever, ever hold yourself back.  If you even think of saying, “I could never be that…,” I’ll know.   What’s more, I’ll show up on your doorstep fit to be tied.

If you can imagine it, you can become it.

“You and I are not what we eat; we are what we think.” – Walter Anderson

Concentrating and focusing on negative images and thoughts gives these negative presences a type of “staying power.”  By dwelling on them, we pretty much extend an invitation to them for an extended stay.  That’s the last thing we should want!

When the very next negative thought pops into your head, replace it with a positive thought.  If you begin to beat yourself up about something, flip the negative thought into a positive one.  Instead of saying, “I’m overweight,” say, “I’m getting more physically fit every day.”

Instead of saying, “There are so many things I don’t know,” say, “I’m learning new things every day!”

You get the picture… and isn’t it a positive one?

In the same way that negative thoughts move right into your life (toothbrush in hand), positive thoughts can become permanent house guests as well.  The beautiful thing is – negative thoughts and positive thoughts don’t get along.  When one moves in, the other moves out.

What Positive Thoughts Can Do For You

The mind is an amazing thing. We tend to live up to, or down to, our most frequent thoughts.   This is one of the reasons it’s so important to give a child positive reinforcements with encouraging words and praise.  Children think their parents know everything, so they take their every word as the Gospel truth.  Their thoughts center around the feedback their parents give them.  As I’ve said before, I was an only child (spoiled.. the whole stereotype firmly intact).  My parents always told me I could do anything.  My every stroke with a Crayon was sheer genius and everything out of my mouth was witty and wise.   My parents (along with grandparents and loving aunts and uncles) made me feel like I could do absolutely anything.

Positive reinforcement gives an individual power – whether the individual is a spoiled little girl or a grown adult.

Begin telling yourself the sort of things you’d tell your own child.  Be kind. Be gentle.  Be positive.  Be encouraging.  Never tell yourself you can’t do something you want to do.  Promise to figure a way to do it.

Form a clear image of the life you want in your mind today.  Right now, even!  Then begin paving the way from HERE to THERE one positive thought at a time. Of course it’ll take work, effort, and good old-fashioned elbow grease – but remind yourself that you’re headed in the right direction and that you’ll make it in grand style.

“The world we have created is a product of our thinking; it cannot be changed without changing our thinking.” – Albert Einstein

As you travel the path toward your goals, be on the lookout for negative thoughts – they’ll creep in like nasty little trolls.  Don’t let them wreck your progress or break your stride.  Simply push them out of the way with a positive thought.  I used to teach our daughters that when they were tempted to do something bad (pick on a sister, skip their homework, neglect their chores), the best way to handle it was to immediately do something good (make their bed, read, do a worksheet).   Good and bad aren’t on the same team.  And since one leads to good things happening and the other leads to bad things happening, the choice is a clear one.

The same’s true with thoughts.  Positive thoughts lead to good things and negative thoughts lead to bad things.

Child’s play.

“Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you’ll start having positive results.” – Willie Nelson

Photo Credit: John Edwards

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The Instant Millionaire: A Tale of Wisdom and Wealth should absolutely be the next book you read. In fact, if you read only one (non-human-authored) book this year, I encourage you to choose The Instant Millionaire by Mark Fisher.

(Of course, then I’d encourage you to read the rest of the books I recommend on Self Help Daily – one by one.  After all, books can encourage, motivate, enlighten, and inspire.  Who wants to miss out on any of that?)

My great love of books and my eagerness to publish book reviews – recommending the best of the best to my friends (that would be you) – often creates a bit of a quandary for me.  I read so many great books that sometimes I fear that truly outstanding ones (such as The Instant Millionaire) will get lost in the masses.  There are times I wonder if each book I recommend will be able to stand on its own two brilliant feet.

However, I saw something the other day that alleviated this book worm’s fears:  A Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval.  They’ve given out gazillions of these honors – the total surpasses even the number of books I’ve read… this year, anyway.  Yet each one of their recommendations more than stands on its own two feet, it stands tall.

Which is my fervent hopes for the books I recommend.  As I often remind you, I don’t recommend each book I read.  Remember the song by Salt & Pepa, Push It.  The great voice at the first of the song says, “Now wait a minute, y’all. This dance ain’t for everybody. Only the sexy people. So all you fly mothers, get out there and dance.  Dance I say.”

In an equally dramatic voice, that’s what I say to my very, very favorite books – aka the ones that blow my socks off.  So here is my review for one such book.  A fly mother, to be sure.

The Instant Millionaire: A Tale of Wisdom and Wealth by Mark Fisher is a highly unique book. It is exactly as the title suggests:  A tale.  A fictional story – as in colorful characters, a plot, unexpected twists, drama, humor, and the whole shebang.  However, the lessons to be taken away from the entertaining story are more than worth the time and money you invest in them.  You’re apt to learn as much, or more, from this book than any book you’ve read in a very long time.

This book has the potential to change your life in ways you never imagined. One of the main reasons is that it reminds you just how important your thoughts are.  Your thoughts build your world or they tear it down.  In this remarkable little talk, Mark Fisher does a beautiful job of illustrating the difference between constructive thoughts and destructive thoughts.

Below are the 3 main reasons I’m so excited about The Instant Millionaire.  These, added to the fact that the book reads fast (although I promise you that you’ll want to read it through several times) AND meets my much-ballyhooed “Treadmill Criteria,” meaning I was able to hold the book and read it as I worked out on the treadmill.   You know the drill, bonus points are awarded to books that allow me this luxury.

  1. The Instant Millionaire opens up a door that leads to a new way of thinking. Not only are you challenged to look at the world and everything in it in a different light when it comes to money, you’re challenged to do so in other areas as well.  In reality, everything in life is a matter of attitude.
  2. The Instant Millionaire opens up a gate that leads to a new view of life. You will realize that the world, as you know it, was created by YOU.  Your every thought has led to your every action, which ultimately have led you to the world that you currently know.  When your mind wraps itself firmly around this truth… look out!  You’ll learn how to harness your thoughts and make them work for you.
  3. The Instant Millionaire opens up a world where you’re only limited by the limits you set yourself. Everything that happens to us is a product of our thoughts.  Positive affirmations spring from this powerful reality.  Life is, to a very real extent, exactly how you see it.  What’s more, we tend to get from life what we expect from it.

Are you as struck by that truth as I am?  We tend to get from life what we expect from it. What do you say, is it time to raise the bar high or what?!  I promise you this:  The Instant Millionaire is the first step in raising this bar, higher than you ever dared to before.

“All the events in your life are a mirror image of your thoughts.” - The Instant Millionaire, Page 46

The Instant Millionaire: A Tale of Wisdom and Wealth contains the single most profound example of the power of words I’ve ever read. It’s something that happens to the main character in Chapter 8 – something that makes you stop and truly think.  You’re along for the ride with him and you FEEL what he’s going through.  Suffice to say it’s more than an AHA moment, it’s an Oh Wow moment.  I won’t give it away here because…

  1. I want you to read the entire book.
  2. It’ll have more of an impact if you meet it head on.

It’s not an overstatement to say that it’s one of the most powerful illustrations regarding the power of words I’ve ever seen. It’s pretty much THE illustration that all of us who are huge believers in positive affirmations have been looking for our entire lives.  It’s proof, positive, that words (whether they’re the ones we say to ourselves or words others say to us) carry far more weight that we give them credit for.

In most cases reasoning and logic become roadblocks in the way of great achievement, because great things are created only by those who have faith in the powers of the mind. – The Instant Millionaire

The Instant Millionaire: A Tale of Wisdom and Wealth will show you how you have been getting in your own way and, more importantly, it’ll show you how to get out of the way.  I read a GREAT DEAL of books that relate to self help, self improvement, mental fitness, positive affirmations, attracting success, and so forth.  Let’s be honest, I swim in the ocean of these books daily.

Okay. Hourly.

However, this particular little book has stopped me in my tracks and has caused me to dig deep into my own cellar of thoughts.  I honestly wish I could put a copy of this book into everyone’s hands – I feel that it’s that important.

I urge you to go immediately to Amazon (by clicking the following link) and order your copy of this outstanding book.  It’s only 121 pages and, as I’ve said, it reads very fast.  I believe most people could read this book in the time it takes them to read the newspaper.  However, when you put the newspaper down, you aren’t any better off for having read it.   When you put The Instant Millionaire: A Tale of Wisdom and Wealth down, you will have taken the first giant step to raising the bar higher.  What’s more you’ll have the tools, keys, affirmations, and knowledge you’ll need to sail right over the bar with room to spare.

So all you fly mothers, get out there and soar.  Soar I say.

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I recently saw a great cartoon that didn’t make me laugh or even smile. How can that be? Great cartoons always make you laugh out loud or at least chuckle a little inside. At the very least, they make your face break out in a smile.

Not this one.

This particular cartoon simply made me think and think hard.

In the cartoon, you see George Washington as a little boy. The future Father of our Country is standing with an ax in his little hand and a once beautiful cherry tree on the ground…. the deed, done. Apparently little George has already made his admission of guilt – you know, something along the lines of, “I cannot tell a lie. I did if, father.”

His obviously frustrated father says, “All right, so you admit it! You always admit it! The question is when are you going to stop doing it?

Le Sigh.

How many of us could star in our own comic strip?  Maybe instead of an ax and a fallen cherry tree we have a napkin and a Big Mac.  As we wipe our mouth we tell our bathroom scales, “I cannot lie. I ate the whole thing – hundreds upon hundreds of wasted calories.”  To which our scales reply, “All right, so you admit it! You always admit it! The question is when are you going to stop doing it?

Oh, there are other areas of our lives where this same scenario could apply:

  • Financial carelessness
  • Bad habits
  • Negative thoughts
  • Poor anger management
  • Dishonesty
  • Laziness
  • Procrastination
  • Gossiping
  • And on and on…

The parent who overreacts to a small child’s infraction only to admit, later that day, that they were way out of line. Their temper got the better of them, yadda yadda yadda.  Like little George, admitting a mistake is well and good – it puts the individual in a small minority of  “super cool” people.

However, when they’re able to learn from their mistakes (rather than simply repeat them) they experience the much-coveted self growth and the much-hyped self improvement.  That’s the point they begin to change their life, as well as themselves, for the better.

I’m sure each one of us had at least one thing in mind when we read the father’s response.  Let this scenario resonate in your mind for the rest of the day.  Replay it in your mind the next time “it” happens and see if you can come up with an answer to the question, “All right, so you admit it! You always admit it! The question is when are you going to stop doing it?

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Terracotta Warriors: Better than Prime Time

Brain Power: Make Yourself Smarter!

Since one of my websites deals with Mental Fitness, I spend a great deal of time wrapping my brain around mental fitness, brain health, memory, brain games, Alzheimer’s prevention, and so forth.  Truth be told, even if it weren’t for this particular website, I’d still be found reading every book, magazine, and article I could get my hands on that dealt with the health of the brain.

Trust me, it’s an incredibly fascinating field.  One can’t underestimate it’s value, either.  Think about it, we spend a great deal of time and money in the pursuit of physical fitness – and rightfully so!  But, what good will any of that do us if we allow our brains to turn to mush?

I don’t want to give details – because it would be decidedly uncool to do so – but I recently had a conversation with someone who told me (with as much shock on their face as I had on mine) that their co-workers were unable to do simple arithmetic.  I’m talking about the sort of arithmetic that a fourth grader knocks out within 5 minutes.  The co-workers range in age from about 28 to 50.

Before I could pick up my jaw, I was told that they also struggled with simple spelling and vocabulary words.

I’m afraid that this isn’t a rare thing.  I’m part of a large, wonderful family – but, aside from them, I’m somewhat kind of sheltered from society.  I work from home, so I don’t have a lot of experience with face to face human interaction.  However, from what I’ve seen and heard, it seems that many people aren’t just letting their minds turn to mush, they’re facilitating the process.

What would it take to snap people out of the mental rut they’re allowing themselves to sink into?  I have no idea but, truth be told, it kind of scares me.  Make no mistake about it, you won’t agree with 100 percent of the things you read on Self Help Daily or Out of Bounds.   I wouldn’t want every visitor to agree with every word.  That would mean I wasn’t – in any way – encouraging you to think or encouraging you to challenge other ideas, beliefs, and concepts.

One of the things nearest and dearest to my heart is mental health and brain fitness.  I spend hours each day researching, reading, and writing within this area.  Maybe that’s why I often come across as almost desperate to get through to people.  If we don’t use our brains, challenge our minds, and pursue mental growth… you guessed it, mush.

We become adults who require a 4th grader to show us how to add fractions, tell us how to spell Antarctica, and clarify the capital of Texas when we aren’t sure if it’s Austin or Dallas.  Granted, as adults we sort of step away from these subjects.  Antarctica, Austin, and fractions may not necessarily come up in our everyday conversations and activities…

…. especially if these activities never vary and especially if the majority of these activities take place in front of sitcoms, reality television, or YouTube.  Oh-my-God, no she didn’t go there.

Mental Exercises and Brain Games

This would be me encouraging you… perhaps even pleading with you…. to broaden your mental horizons – each and every day. Put aside a little time each day to challenge yourself, mentally.  Below are a few mental exercises that you can do just about anywhere.  Occasionally leave the radio off in the car and give your mind something it really craves – challenging brain games and mental exercises.  They’re invigorating, they’re rewarding, and they’ll increase your mental power.

Experts tell us that we can increase our brain’s powers and strength by working it out.  Please make this part of your everyday activities and put it at the forefront of your goals.  In no time at all, fourth graders will be coming to you for all the answers.

  • Name all 50 states, alphabetically.
  • Name each state’s capital (and I promise Nashville IS the capital of Tennessee – no matter how badly you want it to be Knoxville!)
  • Name the 8 planets.  Remember, Pluto was stripped of its planet statusEh, don’t feel bad, Pluto, I’m not a planet either.
  • Name the 7 continents.
  • In the grocery store, calculate the cost of your purchase as you put things into the cart – see if you can come within $2.00.  It’s harder than you think – especially when you have a large purchase and ESPECIALLY when you’re as mathematically challenged as I am.
  • When you’re reading, write down and look up all unfamiliar words.
  • Whenever you hear a word you aren’t 100 percent how to spell, find out how and write the word down 10 times.  Test yourself the next day.
  • Read at least 1 classic this year.
  • Brain Games! Try the Lumosity Brain Training Program. Only $6.60 a month.
  • Read the newspaper more often.  When you read about a person or place that’s unfamiliar to you, do a little research and soak up the new information.  It’s sort of like turning each newspaper into a stimulating mental workout.
  • Work a crossword puzzle each day.
  • Think of favorite television shows from your youth – challenge yourself to remember each character’s name as well as the actors and actresses who played them.  Depending on the length of time (and the size of the cast!), it could take an hour or more for a name to come to you.  But here’s the thing, even if you have to work for the answer, you’re still getting a great mental workout.  A few days ago, I racked my brain for nearly an hour to remember the name of a guest star on The Golden Girls.  I refused to research his name! It came to me while making supper and I felt like I’d ran a mental marathon.
  • Pick up a few grade school workbooks if you need a great refresher’s course in math.  They’re beside the coloring books and you have my permission to grab one of those as well.  Express yourself.
  • Pick an animal, bird, or fish that you know absolutely nothing about and spend the next week reading about your new friend.  Spiders, sharks, polar bears, penguins, hummingbirds, possums, squirrels, bulldogs, iguanas… the list is endless and the opportunities are priceless.  Each week, take on a new animal.
  • Read National Geographic magazine regularly.  Collect old issues – ebay, yard sales, and Goodwill stores make it an unexpectedly fun scavenger hunt.  The pictures and the information can’t be beaten.
  • Each month, tackle a period of history or an ancient culture.  Few things are more fascinating to read about than Ancient China.  Again, National Geographic magazines are a wealth of  information.
  • Tune in to the History Channel, the National Geographic Channel, Discovery Channel, and Animal Planet.  These outstanding channels serve information on platters of entertainment and your brain will love every fascinating minute.
  • Read old books as well as new books.  Old books challenge your mind and stimulate your thinking in a way that new books don’t quite measure up to.  This is part of the reason why I have a Thursday Throwback feature on Self Help Daily.  I can take an author from the distant past and sort of hand the forum over to them for a day.  If you’ve never read older books, I encourage you to browse through the articles in the Thursday Throwback category.  I know you’ll love them – they’re pretty special.
  • This one will surely be unexpected, but sign up for Twitter!  Find a number of people to “follow” from a wide range of interests. Reading other’s opinions and updates will broaden your range.  And, quite frankly, it’s a challenge to express yourself in a limited number of words – at least it’s tough for me Shhhhh… You’ll find yourself reading more, interacting more, and thinking more.

Finally, read up on the different foods that are great for promoting brain health.  I have a great number of articles on Out of Bounds (which I recently treated to a new look) detailing which foods are best for your brain’s health.  I read earlier that a favorite snack of mine, sunflower seeds, are an excellent “brain food.”

From Real Age: “In a study, those who reported getting the highest amount of vitamin E — 19 milligrams a day — were about 25 percent less likely to be diagnosed with dementia or Alzheimer’s disease over a 10-year period. People in the study got much of their vitamin E from processed or sat-fat foods, like butter, margarine, and mayo. Our suggestion? Get your E from healthy sources, such as nuts, seeds, veggies, plant oils, and nut butters. The bonus with nuts and seeds is that you also get a shot of hunger-quelling protein. Not to mention some heart-healthy fats.”

You can gain more brain power.  It’s a fact.  The flip side, however, reads like a horror story:  You can lose brain power.  Like a coin that’s in the air, waiting to land……. it’s your call.

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    In a great story on US News Health about heart health, the American Heart Association outlines the most important factors in achieving optimal heart health.  Seven steps were outlined – steps which each and every one of us should (literally) take  seriously.  Let’s be honest , heart health is one scary monster.  He has a list of victims that I don’t even want to think about.  Fortunately, there are steps we take can  to keep our names off of this massive list.

    Wouldn’t a person be a fool to take their chances with a monster?

    Below are the 7 steps for heart health from the American Heart Association:

    1. Don’t smoke and Quit if you do. The AHA reports that smoking  is considered to be the most important preventable cause of premature death in the United States.
    2. Achieve and maintain your ideal weight. The AHA recommends aiming for a body mass index less than 25 percent. Clyde Yancy, president of the AHA and medical director at the Baylor Heart and Vascular Institute at Baylor University Medical Center in Dallas points out that the USA is “under assault” from obesity and that being overweight or obese is the “first step toward adult-onset diabetes.”   (Click the link to quickly determine your own Body Mass Indexfast, easy, somewhat painless.)
    3. Exercise several times a week. A routine that includes at least 150 minutes of moderate-intensity exercise per week—brisk walking, ballroom dancing, or gardening, for example—or 75 minutes per week of vigorous activity, such as jogging, aerobic dancing, or jumping rope, is one of the targets for achieving ideal heart health, according to the AHA. I love how Yancy breaks it down, “If you’re doing nothing, do something, and if you’re doing something, do more.”
    4. Eat a healthy diet. When it comes to eating more healthy foods, most of us ride a roller coaster.  We’ll eat healthy foods for a few days, then slack off for a while.  Then we’ll return to a healthy diet.  We need to adopt a healthy diet and stick with it! The AHA recommends eating plenty of fruits and vegetables.  Further dietary advice: Also, eat unrefined whole-grain foods, which help you feel full faster and improve your cholesterol level. Eating fish at least two times per week may help decrease your risk of death from heart disease by supplying you with omega-3 fatty acids. Select lean meat and skinless poultry, and when it comes to dairy products, buy fat-free, 1 percent fat, and low-fat items. Seek out healthy recipes and get creative in the kitchen. Healthy food is delicious AND can protect you from many evils.
    5. Control your cholesterol. A total cholesterol level of less than 200 milligrams per deciliter is the goal for ideal heart health.
    6. Lower your blood pressure. One in three adults has high blood pressure.  One in three! Normal blood pressure is less than 120/80, you can find your own reading at a doctor’s office or even in some pharmacies.  Doctors, of course, can prescribe medications to help control your blood pressure, but there are also very effective drug-free approaches:  eating a nutritious diet, regular exercise, stress management, decreasing alcohol use, staying away from tobacco smoke, and keeping your body at a healthy weight.  For more ways to lower blood pressure (including information about the DASH diet) click the link.
    7. Aim for a fasting blood glucose level less than 100 mg/dL. There’s a reason heart health experts always preach avoiding diabetes with all the fight you have within you: Adults who have diabetes are two to four times as likely to end up with heart disease or stroke as people without diabetes, according to the AHA. Frightening numbers. My mother, a diabetic, died at an early age from heart problems.  Simply having diabetes heightens the chance of heart disease and stroke.

    Why do we tend to ignore things until it’s too late?  Think about it.  Each winter, we don’t give the common cold a single thought until the first sniffle – THEN we load up on Vitamin C, frequent hand-washing, chicken soup, and so on. Even worse, we don’t give diabetes, heart disease, cancer, or any other “health monsters” much thought until we’re sitting across from a serious-faced doctor telling us things we never thought we’d hear.

    Let’s vow to begin doing the things we know we should do, eating the things we know we should eat, and avoiding the things we know we should avoid.  Let’s promise ourselves to…

    • Get at least 30 minutes of activity daily – gardening, walking, yard work, aerobics, intense house cleaning…
    • Eat more fruits and more vegetables.  Here’s a trick I’ve found:  If you replace things you know you shouldn’t eat with things you know you should eat, you’re giving your health twice the benefit.  Replace fries with salad, soft drinks with green tea (or black tea – studies show that it’s actually as healthy as green tea… tons of antioxidants), have fruit as dessert, eat vegetable soup instead of pasta, etc.
    • Not put anything into our bodies that we wouldn’t recommend to one of our children.
    • Get plenty of rest and relaxation.
    • Find a way to cope with stress.  Stress wears a person down and makes them more susceptible to illness.  Refuse to give it the chance.

    Let’s make the vow to take better care of our health. and let’s do it as though our lives depend on it.

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    A few posts back, I mentioned the number of women I’ve personally heard from (and others who I have read about) who are currently struggling with what they call the “Empty Nest Syndrome” or as one lady (who’s kids still live at home) referred to as the “May as Well Be An Empty Nest Because the Birds are Always Gone Syndrome.”

    As I’ve said before, I HATE the term “Empty Nest Syndrome.”  What is empty? The total absence of anything. If my coffee cup is empty – - – something that rarely happens, but that’s another story – - -  the cup is without anything in it.  Empty.  Nothing there.

    If a home is empty, there isn’t anyone in it.  Empty.  No one there.

    I was walking around my yard a few weeks ago when I saw a bird’s nest on the ground.  I, hesitantly, turned it over to see if anything was beneath it.  I was greatly relieved to find that the nest was empty.  No one home when it came crashing down.  Now that’s an EMPTY NEST.

    A home in which at least one parent, often two, are living is anything but empty.

    What you’re experiencing (and if you’ve read this far, I assume you’re going through the experience or, at least, know that it exists on the horizon) is simply another chapter in your life.  It’s a chapter that’s simply a little quieter with a little more “free time.”  From here on, I’ll refer to the aforementioned syndrome as the “Quiet House Chapter.”

    The thing that makes this chapter seem so drastically and dramatically different is that it’s a huge transition.  You go from walking out to the car, one day, with multiple kids fighting over who’s turn it is to sit up front to walking out to the same car the next day with only your shadow as a companion.  He, or she, calls shotgun and off you go.

    You go from making lunch for a party of 2, 3, 4, or 5 to making lunch for a party of one – two if your cat’s awake.

    It’s not the end of the world, though, and I get crazy upset with people who act like it is.  It’s a new chapter, that’s all, and as any book lover knows, new chapters can be exciting.  New chapters can be challenging.  And new chapters can be, dare I say it, fun!

    Please don’t get me wrong, I’m not immune to any of the emotions felt.   I’m a mother bird, too.  God blessed me more than I ever thought was possible when he allowed me to become a mother to three beautiful daughters who I love and cherish more than my next breath.  I’d wager to say that this transition in life is even tougher on mothers such as myself, who were stay-at-home moms while raising their children.

    To compound the matter, this particular stay-at-home mom also home-schooled her children all the way through school.  That’s a lot of years of sitting at the table studying history, going to the library, picnics at the park, making lunch together, and so forth.

    That’s why, I believe with all my heart, that my family has been kind of nonchalantly keeping an eye on me – waiting for Mother Hen’s wig to flip.  They know that my family is my life – they always have been and they always will be.  It doesn’t matter if we’re currently under the same roof or not.  Family is family no matter where they count their sheep.

    When you get down to it, it doesn’t matter if you’re a working parent, a work at home parent, or a home-schooling parent,  when the life that you dearly love with every fiber of your being changes – it throws you.  What you have to do is make sure it throws you forward.  Allow it to make you stronger, not weaker.  Demand that it make you better, not bitter.

    And, please let the only parties you throw be happy ones, as in no pity parties allowed.  I promise, you’ll be the only one there.

    Whether you’re kids are living at home (yet seem to be gone all the time) or they’ve already moved out, there are certain tips for coping with the “Quiet House Chapter” as well as a little homespun advice from a Mother Hen who’s proverbial wig is still in place.

    Playing in the Next Room

    Here’s something I shared with one reader a few months ago.  I got an e-mail from her yesterday and she said the advice has worked “brilliantly” for her.  I could tell, just by reading her words that she was in a much better place.  The first few times she contacted me, I could almost “hear” tears in her words – this time I’m almost certain there was laughter.

    Remember when your kids were small and they’d play in their bedroom or the living room?  Even if you were in the kitchen, you knew where they were – playing in the next room.  The concept of them staying in the same room you were in, 24-7, would have seemed bizarre.  Even though they played in the next room, you were their parent and they were your child and you loved them with all your heart.  You knew they were just a “call” away – whether it were you doing the “calling” because supper was ready or they did the “calling” because someone took their Barbie!

    You were 1 call away.

    When your kids are older and they seem to spend more time at the mall than their own bedroom, or they move out on their own or go off to college – it will truly help you to think of them as “playing in the next room.”   The beautiful thing is, you’re still just a “call” away.  Whether it’s you making the “call” because you’re making their favorite casserole for supper or they’re making the “call” because they want to know if paper plates are microwavable – you’re still 1 call away.

    Pull Yourself Together

    There will be days when you feel kind of sad.  There will be days when you think you’d give anything to turn back time.  There will be days when you’re kind of lonely.  It might remind you of when you, yourself, moved away from home for the first time – another huge chapter in your life.  But remember this:  Nothing really changed, did it?

    Well, actually, very often things change for the better.  I honestly believe I grew closer to both my mother and my father after I got married.  The crazy thing is, I’m almost certain I saw them more often – especially when the granddaughters came!  I had them over for dinner several nights a week, we went shopping more often, we walked at the park, my mom always made Sunday dinner, my father and my husband talked for hours about sports…

    Keep one thing in mind:  How you act as you enter this new chapter will determine just how much everyone will want to be around you!  If you make your kids, or husband, feel guilty or try to make them feel sorry for you – you will push them away.  No one wants to take a guilt trip – they’ll simply avoid the risk by avoiding you.  If, every time one of your kids calls you spend half the conversation talking about how lonely or miserable you are, do you really think they’re going to rush to the phone to call you again any time soon?

    For your sake as much as the sake of your family, if you’re coming undone over the Quiet House Chapter, pull yourself together.

    Idle Minds Are the Devil’s Workshop

    Maybe it’s not the nest that’s as empty as it is the life.  I know, ouch. Many times parents get so wrapped up in raising, teaching, caring for, and playing with their children that they overlook one tiny little thing – everyone has to have their own life, their own interests, their own goals, their own ambitions, and their own smiles.

    Yes, their own smiles.

    When parents look at their children – we smile!  Even if the child is being a cantankerous little snot, on some level it amuses us. There’s nothing in the world wrong with smiling at your kids – I smile just thinking about mine.  What’s wrong is acting like they’re the only thing that can bring a smile to your face.  It’s a big, beautiful world out there – filled with, literally, countless things to smile at and about.

    Never let anyone feel that one of their responsibilities in life is to flip your happiness switch.  Flip your own!

    When the Quiet House Chapter begins, you’ll find yourself with lots of free time and free thoughts.  This is where the chapter takes on a certain level of excitement – you get to fill this free time and these free thoughts any way you want.  No one’s dictating what you have to do from this time to that time.    You can take up new hobbies, learn new skills, take up yoga, launch a home business, or write the next great vampire novel.

    Below is a list of different adventures you might want to take:

    • Take up birdwatching.
    • Go to the Animal Shelter and rescue a dog who looks lonely.
    • Rescue two!
    • Learn to speak a new language
    • Learn cake decorating.
    • Take online classes in a subject that fascinates you.
    • Take up photography.
    • Learn everything you can about sharks, whales, dolphins, and the ocean.
    • Volunteer.
    • Begin reading all of Agatha Christie’s mysteries.  Start at the first and keep going until you’ve read them all.
    • Go to the shelter and adopt a couple of kittens.  Cats make incredible companions.
    • Grow an herb garden.
    • Buy a couple of yoga dvds, a great yoga book, and fall in love with the experience.
    • Take up serious walking or biking.
    • Take trips to your local state parks and zoos.
    • Go to the Grand Old Opry.
    • Learn to play an instrument.
    • Make candles, soap, jewelry, or all three.
    • Buy a sewing machine and take up sewing.
    • Learn to quilt.
    • Perfect your homemade bread recipe.
    • Start an eBay business – find great deals on antiques and collectibles, then sell them for extra cash.
    • Visit your library regularly.  Scourge the shelves for fascinating new subjects to read about.
    • Buy a bird!
    • Start an aquarium.
    • Buy hamsters and provide elaborate cages and mazes for them.
    • Start watching a sport you’ve never watched before. Pick a team and follow their every game.
    • Learn to make a great cake from scratch – then experiment with different recipes.

    I know I mention pets a great deal – but, for one thing, I’m the biggest animal lover in the world… and for another, they STAY babies!

    If you decide to pursue a certain interest, buy all the books and dvds you can find on the subject – check out books at the library, research it online, and embrace the fascinating new passion with all you have inside of you.

    Please just remember this – it’s something I harp on a great deal on Self Help Daily and Out of Bounds:  Never, ever stop living – the day you do, you start dying.  If you wake up one morning and you just aren’t sure you have any reason to laugh, find one!  When we move from one chapter to the next in life, there are a couple of things that are RIPE for picking:

    1. We can become bitter, sad, and refuse to make the transition from one chapter to the next.  We can keep looking back, with tear-stained eyes at the chapters we’ve already lived and make everyone around us nearly as miserable as we are.  We can make it so that we have absolutely nothing to contribute to conversations – other than “Well, I hope YOU’RE happy.” and “I’m so LONELY.”  (Wonderful, wonderful conversation nuggets, don’t you think.)
    2. We can look back on our past chapters with joy and pride, while embracing the one we’re currently living in with all that’s within us.  We can become so busy learning new things and taking up new interests and hobbies that our spouse and our kids simply don’t know what we’re going to come up with next!  My oldest daughter was a little taken aback yesterday when I called her out to my garden to show her something I’d found:  On a sage leaf was the largest (HUGE) yellow spider I’d ever seen in my life.  I was so proud!  I had her take a picture of my sage loving friend.  My sweet, petite, lovely daughter said, “Kill it!” a couple of times but why would I go and do a thing like that?!  Yes, I’ve become fascinated with spiders.  I guess it was only a matter of time.   The mammoth spider lived to see another day and he provided me with another interest to pursue.

    Life is filled with excitement, fun, and fascinating moments – as long as you keep looking for them.  I don’t beg often, but if you’re currently going through this chapter in your life, I beg you to fill your days with reasons to smile…  and, no they don’t have to be spiders!

    If you ever want a sounding board, my e-mail is on the site.   Now, I’m off to the garden to see if  “Sargent Sage” is lurking around. Such a handsome devil.  (By the way, the spider at the top of the post isn’t my spider – it’s no where near as large or charismatic).

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    “Wonderful thing…. No matter how filthy something gets, you can always clean it right up.” – “God,” as played by Morgan Freeman in Bruce Almighty

    A few weeks ago, our family had one of “those” weeks.  Oh, who am I kidding – we had one of those months.  What’s worse, the month was in such a foul mood that it looked like it’d grow into one of those years.  3 out of 5 of us had sinus problems, 2 out of 4 vehicles broke completely down and took days to get fixed (not to mention $$$$), the dryer decided it  didn’t like its job, and every bill that could come due did come due – without considering, for one moment, the unexpected extras.

    Bills are so uncool that way.

    There were other ridiculous things that happened but, for sanity’s sake I seemed to have blocked them out.  Allow me to add that all of this came about as we’re planning our oldest daughter’s wedding… in two short months.  Her dress?  Well, it hasn’t come in yet.

    Breathe.

    During one of the crazy days, one of my girls pointed out that I never seemed to get stressed or “flip” out.  I thought about it for a second and realized that, generally speaking, I don’t.  Not over things that can be fixed, anyway.  If there will be any flipping on my part, I’ll be when something or someone has been lost to me forever.

    Then, well, I do give a flip.

    But when you think about it, temporary situations – even those that pile up like building blocks – simply aren’t worth coming undone over.  Why risk the damage it can do to your heart, your psyche, your good name – to say nothing of how ridiculous one looks mid-flip.

    The next time something unsettling and stressful happens, ask yourself, “Is this a permanent loss or a temporary mess?“  As the great quote at the top of the article says, messes can be cleaned up.   However, if we’re busy coming unglued, stressing out, demanding, “WHY ME?!?!?” and so forth, the clean up will be put off until we’re worn out from our temper tantrum.  By then, chances are that the problem has been compounded, feelings have been hurt, and time has been wasted.

    It’s so much better to simply forgo the tantrum, keep your wits, and grab a mop.

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    Look Who’s Your Age!

    by joi on August 5, 2010

    In keeping with the Think Like a Child Again topic from yesterday, I’d very much like to get all up in your face for a minute or two.  Don’t worry, I’ve brushed my teeth so I’m all minty.

    I have as many pet peeves as the next person – things that people do or say that drive me straight bonkers.  A little one nearly unnerved me a few nights ago:  People at baseball games who sit behind home plate, talking on the phone and waving at the camera.  Noobs!  It’s especially annoying when they’re own pitcher is on the mound. Do you really want to distract him that much?! It’s annoying at best, distracting at worst and I can’t tell you how much I’d love to throw water on people who do it.

    There. I feel better.

    Another pet peeve is one that honestly doesn’t hurt or affect me in any way – I just hate  to see other people do it to themselves.  And that is this:  Acting older than you are or thinking that you’re “too old” for certain things.  I’d rather see a lady in her 60′s wearing the exact same thing my youngest daughter is than see a lady in her 60′s shuffling through the store with curlers in her hair.  The difference?  The one in feisty, young clothes is LIVING.  The shuffler is DYING.  Slowly, but it’s the direction she’s facing.

    On the last season of The Biggest Loser, Bob Harper, literally, made one of the contestants stand up straight and start walking with more pep.  He pointed out that he was shuffling along – YEARS before he should even know what the word shuffle was.  When the gentleman began picking up his feet and walking rather than scooting, he took a good 10 years off his appearance.

    It seems to me that when a lot of people get past 45, they start looking at the finish line for some ridiculous reason.  First of all, why would anyone want to look there in the first place?!  Look around you, at your life and at the beautiful world.  LIVE!

    Below is a list I’ve compiled of men and women along with the year in which they were born. The next time you start thinking you’re too old for this or you aren’t young enough for that, remember who else is your age and knock it the heck off!  You don’t want me throwing water on you, do you?

    Betty White – born in 1922.

    Clint Eastwood – born in 1930.

    John McCain – born in 1936.

    Morgan Freeman – born in 1937.

    Raquel Welch – born in 1940.

    Harrison Ford – born in 1942.

    Joe Biden – born in 1942.

    Michael Douglas – born in 1944.

    Helen Mirren – born in 1945

    Sylvester Stallone – born in 1946.

    Al Gore – born in 1948.

    Samuel L. Jackson – born in 1948.

    David Letterman – born in 1947.

    Hilary Clinton – born in 1947.

    Paula Deen – born in 1947.

    Liam Neeson – born in 1952.

    Denzel Washington – born in 1954.

    Oprah Winfrey – born in 1954.

    Bruce Willis – born in 1955.

    Reba McEntire – born in 1955.

    Billy Bob Thornton – born in 1955.

    Denise Austin – born in 1957.

    Madonna – born in 1958.

    Kevin Bacon – born in 1958.

    Simon Cowell  – born in 1959.

    Valerie Bertinelli – born in 1960.

    Sean Penn – born in 1960.

    George Clooney – born in 1961.

    Barack Obama – born in 1961.

    Demi Moore – born in 1962

    Tom Cruise – born in 1962.

    Alton Brown – born in 1962.

    Steve Carell – born in 1962.

    Sheryl Crow – born in 1962.

    Johnny Depp – born in 1963.

    Brad Pitt – born in 1963.

    Courtney Cox – born in 1964.

    Michelle Obama – born in 1964.

    Russell Crowe – born in 1964.

    Sandra Bullock – born in 1964.

    Bobby Flay – born in 1964.

    Clive Owen – born in 1964.

    Wendy Williams – born in 1964.

    Sarah Palin – born in 1964.

    Robert Downey, Jr – born in 1965.

    Kyra Sedgwick – born in 1965.

    Bob Harper – born in 1965.

    Shania Twain – born in 1965.

    Diane Lane – born in 1965.

    Halle Berry – born in 1966.

    Cindy Crawford – born in 1966.

    Martina McBride – born in 1966.

    Faith Hill – born in 1967.

    Will Ferrell – born in 1967.

    Vin Diesel – born in 1967.

    Tim McGraw – born in 1967.

    Julia Roberts – born in 1967.

    Nicole Kidman – born in 1967.

    Keith Urban – born in 1967.

    Will Smith – born in 1968.

    Rachael Ray – born in 1968.

    Catherine Zeta-Jones – born in 1969.

    Jennifer Aniston – born in 1969.

    Gerard Butler – born in 1969.

    Naomi Campbell – born in 1970.

    Tina Fey – born in 1970.

    Matt Damon – born in 1970.

    Uma Thurman – born in 1970.

    • Now, do you really think you’re too old to turn heads?
    • Are you too old to wear the clothes you WANT to wear?
    • Are you too old to feel sexy?
    • Are you too old to have fun?
    • Are you too old to live out loud?!
    • Are you too old to get fit?
    • Are you too old to go where you want to go?

    These people are living life to its fullest and proving that age no longer matters.  Some weren’t even known until they were past 40.  People are now raising families (and often even starting families) well out of their 20s and 30s.  They’re embarking on new careers, looking all kinds of fabulous, living life out loud, and asking the world one question: “Do you finally get it… age is all in your mind?

    Like most things in life, if we keep telling ourselves something negative, it’ll “set in.”  Negative reinforcement is a powerful, powerful thing and we should be on watch against it 24-7. When we act or allow ourselves to behave or look older than we really are, we only age ourselves.  Literally!

    If you’re not living, you’re dying.

    1. Stand up straight.
    2. Wear what the heck you want to wear.
    3. Grow your hair to your toes if you want to.
    4. Listen to the music that makes you dance in your seat.
    5. Never say, “If I was younger…”
    6. Laugh more…. and do it out loud.

    Get out there and raise a little hell.

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    In the December 2009 issue of SUCCESS Magazine, there was a great article called “Child’s Play: Learn to think like a kid again – and unlock your hidden potential.”  (Click the link to read Chelsea Greenwood’s excellent article online).

    The magazine put together an adorable little panel of children who answered the question “Why are children happier than adults?”  Below are their priceless… and, quite frankly, thought provoking answers and insights:

    “Cause kids haven’t forgotten how to have fun.” – Caitlyn, age 5

    “Maybe because we get to play outside and have recess, but grownups have to stay inside buildings.” – Audrey, age 7

    “Because mommy and daddy take me to the park.” – Alexandra, age 4

    “They get to eat ice cream and go into little spaces.” – Rob, age 6

    “Because we finger paint.” – Aidan Rhea, age 4

    “Because kids get to play more and do more fun things.” – Daniel, age 6

    “Kids are happier than grownups because they have more energy.  Kids are more excited about everything.” – Sarah, age 8

    Well, there you have it, straight from the mouth of babes.  We need to have fun, get more excited, and… best of all… eat more ice cream.  Thanks Rob!

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