What is Up With All the Self-Absorbed People?!

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A lot of people say, “I hate to complain…” but honestly, I have an absolute aversion to it. In fact, when growing up, many times my mom would take me to the doctor only to find that I was much sicker than she thought. I simply didn’t complain.

I still don’t. Don’t like the way complaining tastes in my mouth. Does that make me perfect? HA! Far from it – it simply makes me an optimist who takes her title seriously.

However, I have to do a little belly-aching today. What is up with all of the self-absorbed people these days?! I am not about to get into any politics or world events – I may be a lot of things (crazy cat lady, clown, hideous budgeter, chocoholic, caffeine addict…) but flaming idiot is not one of them. Why does the average man or woman think that THEY’RE opinion is the only one that counts?

Why does the average man or woman not only get mad when others disagree with them… but outraged?! It’s as though they’re screaming, “How dare you not think the way I think?! HOW. DARE. YOU?!!”

What makes their opinions, thoughts, or beliefs more valuable than the people they’re spraying anger all over?

Nothing. The problem is they are self-absorbed and can barely grasp that the world isn’t bowing to their every whim.

The self-absorbed epidemic isn’t just on the big stage, of course. It’s popping up everywhere – in fact, if you watch for it, you’ll be amazed at how rampant it is.

Think about it….

• People take pictures of themselves and plaster them all over the internet – surely everyone else is as interested in how they looked this afternoon as they are.
• They take their holier-than-thou selves to other people’s blogs, YouTube channels, websites, and social media and tell them what they’re doing wrong, what’s wrong with how they look, and how blissfully far from perfect they are. (I recently read someone criticize a celebrity chef for their fudge recipe… she said it was too sweet. Fudge! Too sweet!)
• How many people have you seen in a GORGEOUS location with their camera phone pointed at themselves instead of the beauty around them?!
• Ever listen to “podcasts?” Self-Absorption is rampant there, too.  It never fails to amaze me how some “hosts” or “interviewers” always turn the subject back to themselves. The guest can be talking about his/her field of expertise and how they can help others… only to be interrupted a hundred times by the host who seems aghast that the subject has veered away from them.  I once found myself counting the number of times one guy said, “I” or “Me” or “My” during an interview. I lost track at 50 something and he wasn’t halfway through.
• Selfies are a thing. However did we survive without taking pictures of ourselves before social media?! I guess we always figured that if we did something worthy of a picture, someone else would take it.
• The people who get so bent out of shape in traffic, stores, or restaurants? Sure, a lot of it is bad manners, immaturity, and short fuses, but at the heart of it is this – they are totally self-absorbed and can’t imagine how anyone could dare get in their way or slow them down.

The list goes on, but I’m kind of getting depressed, so I’ll end here.

What I’m driving at isn’t really intended for the self-absorbed crowd. No one can really help someone overcome a trait like that – the individual has to have a light-bulb moment and get so completely disgusted with themselves that they change. Unfortunately, you simply cannot turn someone else’s light-bulb on for them. Sure, you can try, but if they aren’t ready to SEE, they’ll simply slap your hand and turn it back off.

I’m just kind of giving the rest of us a reminder – don’t follow where they lead. Here’s the thing, even when we detest certain traits with everything within us, we sometimes follow suit. I read once that children who are abused often grow up to be abusive. That seems completely backward, doesn’t it? They should know better than anyone how wrong it is to EVER hurt another person. And yet…

A lot of it comes down to self awareness. We’d all do well to occasionally take a good, honest look at the person we’re becoming and ask, “Is this what I had in mind?”

When you live in a particular society, it can rub off on you if you aren’t careful. It can become the “norm.” Just think of the people we have made rich and famous – some of the most self-absorbed people to ever walk the earth.

Don’t let it become normal to you and… whatever you do… don’t drink the Kool-Aid. The more people who do become self-absorbed, the worse off we’ll all be.  Be on guard against accepting their way as the right way. It isn’t. Be concerned about others, compassionate, and always on the look out for someone’s life you can touch. Put others first and see how rewarding your life will be!

Okay, complaining over. I’m going to drink a Chai Tea Latte to get the negativity out of my mouth.

I hope your New Year is off to a beautiful start. I have SO many things planned for Self Help Daily this year! Thanks for visiting – you honestly honor me with your company. ~ Joi (“Joy”)