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3 Simple Ways to Gain Get a Healthier Perspective on Life

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Our Lives Move in the Direction of Our Strongest Thought

What are YOUR Strongest Thoughts??

Stress and anxiety are realities of life and, quite frankly they always have been! I think we tend to think of them as new discoveries when, if we’re being honest, they’ve been around as long as humans have.

One of the worst things about feeling stressed and anxious is the fact that the feeling robs you of the beauty of the here and now. But, it goes even beyond this. Feeling stressed and anxious causes you to feel so overwhelmed that you lose, to a certain degree, any interest in tomorrow. It’s as though the overly-taxed mind says, “If today feels this bad, I sure hate to see what tomorrow feels like!”

This is why it is so vitally important to be proactive about dealing with stress. One of the first steps you can take is to decide… “Today is the day!” I will (not may) bring perspective back to my life and into my world. I will (not may) focus more on the people and things that truly matter in my life. My well-being and their well-being are too important to lose sight of!”

When you make up your mind to gain more perspective in your life and bring more focus into your own personal world, even the sun will look a little brighter!

Here are a few questions to ask yourself as you bring everything into perspective:

What are My Strongest Thoughts?

See the polar bear at the top of the page? He carries with him a wonderful quote by Craig Groeschel: Our lives move in the direction of our strongest thoughts.

This is so incredibly true – it sort of fleshes out another great quote – You are what you think you are. Many people believe that, to a very real extent, we create our own destinies within our minds. While there are millions of other contributing factors, our tomorrows are absolutely touched by the things we think about and focus on today.

What thoughts do you return to again and again? If you’re quiet for 5 minutes, in which direction do your thoughts run? Before falling asleep at night, what (generally speaking) are your last thoughts? These are usually your strongest thoughts because you give them strength each time you entertain them.

If these litlte Hercules thoughts are negative or worrisome, they’re feeding negativity in your life and causing small problems to loom large. When you’re able to recognize these toxic thoughts for what they are, you can replace them with productive, positive thoughts. Try focusing on things you are thankful for, happy memories, things you like about yourself, or even things you’re planning to do that give you happiness, purpose, and peace of mind.

Are You Taking Care of Your Health?

When we’re feeling stressed or anxious, we often tend to lean toward unhealthy lifestyles and meals. Ask yourself if you’re making your health a priority. Are you eating too much junk food? Do you get fresh air daily? Do you enjoy nature and rekindle the wonders of feeling sunshine on your skin?

Are you eating plenty of vegetables, fruits, and proteins?

How about your vitamin levels? When is the last time you had a complete checkup from your doctor? Very often, when our vitamins and minerals are off (even just a little off!), it affects every single corner of our life. If you haven’t had bloodwork done in over a year, please consider seeing your doctor. Your stress and anxiety may be attributed more to your body than to your circumstances.

We handle things better when we are better ABLE to handle them.

A nutritious diet is also vital to good health and to feeling like yourself. You need the nutrients that come from eating a healthy diet to fuel your brain and body to do great things.

Also, it’s easy to overlook but be sure you’re getting enough water too. Being even a little dehydrated can make you feel miserable physically and mentally.

Fresh air, daily activity, a balanced and healthy diet, and (when needed) daily supplements can help you more than you could ever realize.

Are You Staying in Contact with Loved Ones?

Stress and anxiety are relationship busters. Not because others avoid the person suffering from them but because, more times than not, the one feeling stressed avoids others. There is a tendency to hide away from others when one feels stressed out. Many people offer up reasons and they may or may not be spot on… but, personally, I think people tend to avoid others when they feel down simply because they feel like they can’t handle “anything else.”

When you feel like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders, you don’t want to put on a happy face or try to make your voice sound like you’re on top of the world when you feel like it’s on top of you.

While it’s easier to hide when you feel this way, it is of the utmost importance NOT to. You need your family and friends more than you may realize. Let them know how you feel – that you’re having a “bad day” (or week or month!). They want to help and, I’ll let you in on a secret, they may be feeling the same way! If that’s the case, you can help them by showing that it’s okay to admit when you need a lift.

Is Your Stress Controlling Your Life or Are You Controlling It?

This last question may seem overly simple but it is so vital. In fact, I want you to ask yourself these three questions routinely for a while until you’re able to HONESTLY give the answers you know you need to be able to give.

Please be proactive and take control of your stress and anxiety. Life is a big, beautiful place and I do not want you to miss a single moment. You deserve happiness and peace of mind and you deserve a healthy perspective on life. I hope and pray you will begin right this very minute creating everything in your world that you deserve. Don’t let stress or anxiety rob you of any more happiness and peace.


Never Try to Be Someone You’re Not…. Be YOU!

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Quote About Being Yourself

Be Yourself… Always

Something that bumfuzzles and frustrates me nearly to the point of being speechless is when people try to be anyone and everyone except for the only one they’re meant to be… themselves!

Undoubtedly you’ve seen these birds, yourself…

  • The lady who posts pictures of herself from the gym (multiple pics from ONE trip, mind you), talking about how much fitness matters to her… calling herself a gym rat…yet you know, full well (and evidence will bear you out) she went the ONE time. She wants to appear to be fitness-minded when she really isn’t. Why?
  • The man who happens to be a night owl, yet seems convinced that everyone he’s trying to impress in the world expects him to be an early bird. So he shuts off the late night movie he happens to be enjoying, heads to bed, then drags himself out of bed at 5:00 the next morning, crowing to the world, “I’m up! I’m up! I’m UPPPPP! Look, Twitter… I’m up with the roosters!” Why?
  • The girl who really isn’t into name brands or even clothes for that matter. She’d much rather spend her money on books or toys for her dog…. but the “cool girls” wear only the most expensive jeans and she has to fit in, right? Why?
  • The college student who eats just like the rest of us, but thinks he’ll impress more people if he claims to be Keto. Why?

I think the answer to each why is the same – they aren’t completely comfortable in their own skin, so they want to slip into someone else’s skin. Sounds creepy.. and to an extent, it kind of is. Thing is, when people hop on social media and try to paint themselves in a certain way, they’re only making their own self image issues and lack of confidence worse. They’re creating a “them” that doesn’t even exist, so when they look at this fake image (like a false god from Old Testament times!)… there’s nothing there!

If you ever find yourself creating a dream scenario of yourself – stop before you even begin. If you’re eating a hamburger, own it! Say, “I’m eating a hamburger, and if you think that’s something, you should see the fries!”

Don’t like working out? Admit it, no one will hate you for it.  I haven’t attempted anything near a “work out” in 6-7 years, but best I can remember I hated it! If you want to let the world know what you’re doing – be honest about it. Sitting in your favorite chair, watching your favorite television show, give it a shout out. Reading a great author, recommend the book. THIS is the way you find like-minded friends and THIS is the way you learn to both meet and like yourself.

Think about it, if the people you’re so worried about impressing wouldn’t like or respect the real you…. why are you even wasting your time with them?


You Can (Almost) Always Find What You’re Looking For… So Be Careful What You Seek!

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Perspective Quote

Short story to set the stage – even if it does involve telling on myself and my ridiculousness in the process:

A few years ago, my husband was away for a business trip. I’m not the bravest person in the world, so when my daughters began talking about something VERY scary they had read about one afternoon, my brain whispered, “Well, if this doesn’t keep you awake all night, nothing will.” I pushed the whisper aside and reasoned that by the time bedtime rolled around and the lights were off, I’d be fine.

WRONG.

As soon as the lights turned off, the brain turned on. It felt compelled to remind me of the “true” horror story. Being very familiar with myself and knowing what it’d take for me to get any rest whatsoever, I grabbed my iPhone and Googled, “Why {insert horror occurrence} is a hoax.” Badabing! I found explanation after explanation of why this couldn’t possibly have happened and found “holes” punched everywhere within the story.

I slept like a baby.

Here’s the tricky thing – Had I been a complete idiot and Googled, “Why {insert horror occurrence} is true,” I’d have found… you guessed it… just what I was looking for.

I’m sure you’ve figured out where this is heading, right?

So often, in life, what we “find” doesn’t happen by mistake or coincidence – we “find” it because, whether we realize it or not, it’s what we were looking for.  I see it online with social media almost daily. There are some people who seem absolutely SET on finding drama and stirring up stress and emotions. I don’t want to get off track, here, but what is up with these people?! I want things to be as calm and peaceful as possible… who, in their right mind, wants drama circling around them?!

Whether it makes sense or not, they search for it and, naturally, they find it.

I’m always amused when, after it hits the fan, they act shocked and confused like, “How did this storm happen???”

You did the rain dance, honey, that’s how!

By contrast, there are people (raising my hand high) who get on social media to be informed, entertained, amused, and (hopefully) provide these things for others. Again, what they seek is generally what they find.

Have you ever seen a 4 year old who is tired and cranky? He/she seems to be actively looking for trouble, don’t they? How like children adults can be!

This is a short post because the real trick is simply to get your thoughts flowing. You don’t need me to tell you if you set out looking for drama, gossip, and maybe even a little argument now and then. You don’t need me to tell you if you actively seek out calmness, harmony, and goodwill. You already know you – as well as I know my Chicken Little ridiculous self! I’m only here to ask you this – Is what you seek conducive toward your happiness and mental health or not? Is what you tend to actively look for constructive to your relationships or destructive?

Make no mistake about it, each of these questions has a clear answer.

We find what we actively seek… make sure you’re looking for something worth having, because you will find it.

~ Joi

How to Simplify Your Life (Infographic)

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Complications are not fun. They aren’t peaceful, they aren’t lovely, they aren’t cool…. they aren’t anything but unnecessary, unwelcome headaches.

In that vein, I’d like to propose that we all simplify our lives in 2017. I believe the benefits will be felt in every corner of our lives – including our physical, emotional, and mental health.

The infographic below is a wonderful way to get the ball rolling. The infogrpahic gives us a lot to think about and will help us recognize the areas of our own lives that need a little simplifying.

Courtesy of: NetCredit

How to Stop Cussing: Breaking a Habit That Freaking Doesn’t Want to Be Broken!

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How to Stop Cussing
Before getting to the tips that’ll help you stop cussing, I have to tell you this funny and very true story: Once there was a young man who happened to be a Pastor’s son. Even though the boy was very young and fresh out of high school… without any experience aside from chewing gum… one of the men in the church pulled some strings and helped get him on at a local factory – a factory that paid great money. It happened to be a plant that everyone in a three county radius wanted to work at because the pay and benefits were outstanding.

The arrangement didn’t last beyond six months. Turns out, factory work turned out being incredibly tough for the young man and he decided that he didn’t care much for it.

But you need a really solid reason to leave a very good job that someone helped you get – especially when you have to look your dad (the Pastor, not less) in the face and tell him you’re leaving said job. The young man found what he considered to be an admirable excuse and one his father would approve of. He said that there was far too much cussing going on at the plant. He simply didn’t want to be around all of the foul language.

When asked what he planned to do, he replied, “I’m going to join the Marines.”

TRUE STORY. Priceless and wonderful and as true as a cat’s attitude.

Let’s get to the subject at hand, or rather tongue, shall we….

So, how’s it going with those New Year’s Resolutions?!! Oh, don’t want to talk about it, huh? I understand.

I perfectly understand.

One of my own resolutions – to give up sweet tea and drink plain Jane unsweet tea instead –  isn’t going exactly purring right along. I haven’t succumbed to the sweet white tempter, yet, but the day is still young.

I’ve been reading a lot of different people’s resolutions and got an idea (if nothing else, it’ll distract me from brooding about sweet tea). I decided I’d pick some of the resolutions that I know something about or that I think I could offer at least a few words of encouragement for people trying to sort them out.

One that stood out to me was the resolution to stop cussing. Unlike a sweet tooth the size of the Grand Canyon, this is not a problem area for me.  I’m not sure if it was the case everywhere, or if it was a Southern thing, but during my formative years, women and girls didn’t cuss. If they did, it was frowned mightily upon. The guys did, when “the occasion called for it” but the gals?

Heavens no!

So, I simply never had a problem with cussing, swearing, turning the air blue… whatever you want to call it.

The problem is there are plenty of people who never had a problem with it until they started hanging around (or married) someone who had a very real problem with it.  Funny thing about less-than-desirable habits, they’re much easier to latch onto and copy than the good ones.

Ever wonder why that is? I wonder all the time and still haven’t figured it out!

I’ve known girls who never said a word that couldn’t be spoken in front of the Pope, himself, who started hanging around with people who cuss so often they seem like they’re talking in tongues. Within a year, I find myself hoping they never meet the Pope.

Habits rub off on you when you least expect it.

What’s more, Holy cats, swearing is everywhere! TV shows, movies, and mainstream music are to be kind of expected – but cooking websites, news stories, and commercials? WOW.

Now, before you think I’m clutching my pearls, here, or that individuals who have made this resolution are trying to be “holier than thou”- that is not the case. Swearing can prove to be a very embarrassing habit. The individual who swears as easily as they breathe will… not might… will drop their guard at some point at let out a string of profanities at the worst possible time.

What’s more, cussing in front of children (aka breathing tape recorders) has never and will never lead to anyplace worth going.

There are plenty of reasons WHY people want to quit (or at least cut way back on) cussing. The tips below can help them put the odds in their favor.

How to Stop Cussing and Swearing

  1. Most of the time, swearing is a result of anger or, at the very least, frustration. Simply put, while some people swear as though it’s a part of their everyday vocabulary (more about these birds in a minute), the average swearer does so because he/she has stubbed their toe, has more bills than money, is annoyed with a family member, or has been called upon to wait 5 minutes for a table at Olive Garden. If you tend to turn the air blue when you’re either feeling anxious or angry, recognize that and watch out for it. When you’re having a stressful day (or week… month… year?!) remind yourself that you are very vulnerable right now. This reminder will cause you to put your brain in gear before you open your mouth.
  2. If you tend to cuss as easily as you breathe and the words you’re wanting to get rid of roll off your tongue as easily as horse, lunch, telephone pole, or sweet tea.. you are going to have a little bit of a tougher road than the angry swearers. Why? You don’t differentiate between moods – you’d just as soon rattle off the &$*@s while happy and content as you would while stressed and angry. You will have to start paying EXTRA close attention to the words that come out of your mouth. I’ve known people who cussed during a conversation and then swore up and down they didn’t say one word, let alone 3,302. People, it would appear, aren’t in the habit of listening to themselves. Problem is – how are you going to improve your speech if you don’t really hear what’s coming out of your own mouth?!
  3. Crazy tip (but one that works): Come up with your own innocent word or phrase to use in place of the unacceptable ones. When I was growing up, my aunt had her own favorite.. “Shoot a monkey.” How’s that for southern? That became my own “colorful phrase” and it served me well. Over the years, the animal lover in me simply couldn’t abide by it, so my own words became “heck” and the recently updated “heckity heck”(hey, tough times call for stronger language). I’m also very fond of “holy cats” and son-of-a-gun.  My mom worked with a lady who went with “doodle.” Yeah, that one doesn’t do much for me either. The thing is, this may be the only fun part of the whole process, so enjoy it. Come up with something that will be your replacement word/phrase, then take it for a test drive. Bonus tip: don’t go with rhymes or words that sound similar.  You’ll defeat your purpose if you sound like you’re doing what you’re trying not to do.
  4. This is just my own personal opinion – but I wouldn’t ask for a “helper” on this one. I wouldn’t have your significant other, son, daughter, mom, dad, or friend try to “catch” you or point out your language. Seriously – that’s asking for trouble and is putting them in a very unfair position…. a position similar to placing them in front of a runaway freight car. Hold yourself accountable by listening to your own words because, unless you’re the easiest going, kindest, mildest person in the world… you are not going to appreciate being interrupted mid rant.