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A Lesson About the Importance of Thoughts From Carol Tuttle

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One of the books I was recently sent to read and share with my readers was Remembering Wholeness: A Personal Handbook for Thriving in the 21st Century by Carol Tuttle.

I often like to introduce you to an author and their work simply by sharing a passage from their book with you. What better way to become familiar with an author, right?!

If I were to summarize this book in one paragraph, it would be this: Remembering Wholeness challenges the reader to ask this question, “Am I in control of my life or is my life in control of me?” Carol Tuttle eloquently reminds the reader that we are in control of our own destiny and that we have the power…. and the right… to go after those things we want most.

Since this whole attitude begins in one very important place – our mind – I thought I’d share a passage from the book about thoughts. It’s from Chapter 2: We Choose Every Thought We Think And We Can Create Any Thought We Want.

We think approximately sixty thousand thoughts daily.  We are always thinking.  Our mind can be our best friend or our worst enemy depending on what we choose to do with it.  God has given us a powerful tool that allows us to be creators of our lives.  We are completely in charge of our minds.  No matter how we are feeling physically or emotionally, we are free mentally to think any thought of our choice.

Our mental body is at a higher vibration than our emotional body, meaning our minds are more powerful than our feelings.  We have been trained to listen to our feelings and create thoughts that match our feelings.  Therefore, if we are feeling negative feelings, we will think negative thoughts.  We believe we cannot start thinking and perceiving ourselves in a positive light until we feel positive feelings.  Take charge of you life by taking charge of your thoughts.  Change your life by changing your thoughts. – Carol Tuttle: Page 9, Remembering Wholeness: A Personal Handbook for Thriving in the 21st Century.

Over the coming days, pay close attention to your thoughts.  See how many positive, proactive, constructive thoughts you have as opposed to negative, passive, destructive thoughts.  Problems you may be experiencing can, more likely than not, be traced directly back to stinkin’ thinkin’ – the good news is that, if this is the case, the cure is completely within your reach.

Winning Out Over Negative Thoughts Once and For All

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My beautiful baby, Alexa.

One of our spoiled rotten cats, Alexa (pictured above), loves bird watching almost as much as I do.  My husband fills the bird feeders and I set seed on the ground for the ground feeders, then Lexie and I get lost in the parade of doves, cardinals, robins, blue birds, blackbirds, etc.

Every now and then, a bird will land on the ledge of one of our dining room or kitchen windows.  Yesterday morning, the craziest thing happened.  I was at the dining room table on my laptop, sidetracked by a couple of the brightest cardinals in the world enjoying the seed on the ground.  Alexa was in another room, swatting around one of her leftover plastic eggs from Easter (I told you she was spoiled).

A dove landed on the ledge of the window directly in front of me and peered in.  He’d ruffle his feathers, pace back and forth, then peer in again.  He seemed to think his reflection was another bird and he was doing his best to impress (or scare) it.  I wasn’t sure which, but  I froze, wanting him to stick around – and hoped like crazy that Alexa didn’t arrive on the scene.  I knew she’d take a dive at the window and scare away my newest diversion from work.

After about the 9th pace, I heard Alexa let out her familiar “Where are you?!” meow and could tell that she was entering the dining room.  Just as I turned to look at her, she spied my little visitor and tried to make an all-in-one dive for the window.  I grabbed her and carried her into another room, offering to play a great game of swat the egg or chase the catnip-filled mouse.

She wanted none of it!  As soon as she thought I wasn’t paying attention, she tried to bolt for the dining room again.  Oddly enough, the bird was still at it, so I diverted Alexa’s attention again.  This time, I took her into another room and set her on the window sill of another favorite lookout.

She was content and by the time we returned to the dining room, the bird was gone.

I read a comment on this blog not long ago in which the individual was talking about thoughts and how hard it is to make negative thoughts stop.  As the commentator very rightly said, they often don’t go away just because we want them to.  Like extra weight, negative thoughts seem to have no particular place to go and all the time in the world to get there.

Sometimes our thoughts are like Alexa – BENT on going exactly where they have no business going.  Like her, left to their own devices, they’ll carry out their evil plan and never look back.

That’s where we have to step it!  We all know how negative thoughts can hinder us:

  • If we dwell on negative, self-defeating thoughts, they take the wind out of our sails and cause us to lose the game before it even begins.
  • If we dwell on negative thoughts about other people, we’ll be the ones missing out.  We’ll fail to see their wonderful traits and miss out on a great relationship, simply because we refuse to quit focusing on the negative.
  • If we keep looking back at past mistakes, we never really move away from them.  We keep carrying them around with us forever.
  • If  we keep thinking a negative thought over and over and over – make no mistake, it will come out of your mouth at some point, then it’ll be too late to do anything about it.
  • If we keep having negative, fearful thoughts – we’ll never enjoy life, we’ll always be too worried about what might happen or what could possibly happen.

Every negative thing done or said once began inside someone’s head.

Be sure to keep this in mind as well:  Negative thoughts often disguise themselves as concern.  They’ll try to convince you that you’re fixating on every single solitary thing your teenager does simply because you’re concerned for him.  While parental concern is as real as my love for animals, there’s something else that’s very real – The negative pit.  Once a parent falls into this pit (they don’t like what their child wears, the music they listen to, the people they hang out with, the job they choose, the classes they take..) – two things are certain:

  1. They will be far more miserable than their son or daughter – after all, they’re the ones in the stinking pit!
  2. The child will avoid them and refuse to discuss anything at all with them.  Why bother, they know what you’re going to say – they’re wrong, you wouldn’t have done it that way, they made a “dumb” decision, and… while you’re at it… why don’t they cut their hair?

The same is true for anyone, not just our kids.  If you allow yourself to flounder in a negativity pit, no one will want you around.  Negative people suck the life and energy out of a room and no one gets out of bed in the morning looking for that kind of action.

What about thoughts that only affect us?  This is where I believe most of us have problems.  We’ll often find ourselves doubting our abilities or selling ourselves short.  We’ll be smack in the middle of a job when the little voice says, “What do you think you’re doing?!  Who are you kidding, this is over your head.”   Then we recall past failures and begin to seriously doubt that we’re fit to do anything but tie our own shoes.

If these negative thoughts aren’t diverted, your success and happiness will be.

Whether you need to harnass your negative thoughts from polluting your own life or the life of someone else (as well as your own), the following are a few suggestions.

Just as I physically picked up Alexa and carried her to a different room, you have to mentally pick up your negative thoughts and carry them to a different place.  Simply saying that you don’t want to think a particular thought isn’t enough, you have to replace it with another one.

  • If you begin to doubt yourself in a particular area, bring to mind your strengths and past successes.  Write them down, so you’ll have them the next time negative thoughts come onto the scene.
  • If you keep having negative thoughts about a particular person, try to begin focusing on positive things about the person.  Thinking negative ones is simply a habit, create a new habit by focusing on the positive.
  • If you’re having a particularly troublesome day with negative thoughts – change the scenery.  Sometimes going for a walk, seeing a movie, going shopping, or just going for a frappuccino will do a world of good.
  • Get physical! No, I’m not giving you permission to punch a co-worker.  Get up and get that body moving.  Physical activity makes you feel better and may be just the “bouncer” you need for negative thoughts.
  • If you tend to be a worry wart, hold your thoughts accountable.  Ask yourself how many disasters you’ve actually witnessed!   We often expect the worse when, if fact, we’ve very rarely seen the worse.

Finally, if there is one particular negative though that you battle – here’s one approach.  Write it down on a piece of paper, crumble the paper up, and throw it away.  Tell yourself that that’s the last time you ever want to hear from it!

Granted, at first you may feel just a little ridiculous – but do you want to know how you’ll feel as the crumbled paper lands in the trash… where it belongs?

As free as a bird.

The Power of Positive Thoughts and the Pain of Negative Thinking

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Beautiful Bo

Your life is the product of repeated thoughts. – Grenville Kleiser

Think good things – good things happen. Think bad things – bad things happen.

You’re right, I absolutely just set a new record for oversimplifying.

Of course, I held the old record, so what do you expect?

There’s a saying amongst actors, “You’re only as good as your last picture.” On a grander scale, we can say that we’re only as great as our last great thought. Of course, the flip side of that would be, We’re only as weak as our last weak thought. Think about yourself for a moment. What are the first thoughts in your mind? Did you think of your wit, your brains, your bad habits, your ridiculously frightful upper arms (sorry, Michelle Obama… the whole arm envy thing), your loyalty, your great smile?

If negative thoughts jump out at you, do something about them. Don’t wait another day – if there is something about you that you feel negatively about, don’t wait for magic to show up in the middle of the night, make your own magic. If you’ve been doing something and it isn’t working, either try something different or dive in with an all new force and determination.

Look out arms.

Did you know that there is incredible power inside even the smallest thought? That’s why I’ve always drummed this into my daughters’ heads: Think highly of yourself or no one else will. Focus your thoughts constructively and think of them as building blocks. When negative, silly, unproductive thoughts creep in, usher them out and get back on track.

We, very often, live up to or live down to our thoughts. If we tend to think of ourselves as….

  • – a victim, we’ll be a victim.
  • – jinxed, we’ll be jinxed.
  • –  a survivor, we’ll be a survivor.
  • – an a$$, we’ll be an a$$.
  • – a winner, we’ll be a winner!

What’s more, if we continue to think of ourselves this way, we’ll always be either a victim, a survivor, and/or a winner.

Just a side thought (after all, when I’m not being the high priestess of oversimplifying, I’m the princess of side roads): Why in the reason of all that’s sane and right would anyone want to be a victim?  Why would they want to paint a picture depicting themselves as a put upon, victimized, taken advantage of, abused, and mistreated soul?  If that’s them at their best, I don’t ever want to see their worst.  Everyone has his or her battles and scars.  Everyone has lived through a nightmare they wish they’d never had.  Don’t be a victim.

Okay, back to the main road.

When you think about your dreams and goals, do you believe in your heart of hearts that they’ll come true? If not, you’d better find a way to start believing or your beliefs will be prophetic. Pinpoint your weaknesses and do everything in your power to strengthen them. Remember, never be ashamed to ask for help when you need it.

If you completely believe in your dreams and in your ability to make them happen, you’re well on your way. Keep your thoughts focused and keep them totally positive. Your dreams will be so close that if they ate onions, you’d smell it on their breath!

A Few Thoughts About, Well, Thoughts

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“Everything we say, do, and physically manifest first begins in thought.” – Mary J. Lore

I swim in motivational quotes almost as much as I swim in coffee, so you’ll have to forgive me if I can’t think of the EXACT quote, let alone the one who quoted it – but there’s a quotation that pays homage to the fact that the worst of times brings out the best in people.

I thought about this fact recently after finishing yet another brilliant book.  This one was Managing Thought: How Do Your Thoughts Rule Your World? by Mary J. Lore and it was a thought provoking book if the truest sense of the phrase.

This book puts your thoughts on trial and sees which ones should be locked away and which ones can actually contribute to society.

I’ve always been fascinated by thoughts.  They can catch you completely off guard, can’t they?  You can be weeding your flower bed, thinking only of your marigolds, when suddenly you remember something that someone once said that hurt your feelings.  Then you’re faced with a choice – you can mark that thought as “unworthy” and squeeze it out of the way, or you can dwell on it.  The fun thing about dwelling on this kind of thought is that it ruins your entire day.  And mood. Then, you can run inside and call the person up – with icy venom dripping from your words. “Do. You. Remember. When. You. Said. I. Was. Selfish? – Yes, I know it was 18 years ago. You still said it!”

So, you ruin your mood, the other person’s day, and look like a whackadoodle in the process.  I admit  it, I’ve been on the whack side of the doodle a time or two.

Most people claim that they simply can’t control their thoughts.   They realize that certain negative thoughts aren’t good for them, but they feel that they just can’t help themselves.  The author addresses this thought early in the book:

Most of us believe that we don’t have control over our thoughts.  To demonstrate the fallacy of this belief, take a look at the following exercise.

EXERCISE: Take a moment to think of an ice cream cone.  Think of the type of cone, the type of ice cream, the number of scoops, the toppings, if any.

Now stop thinking of the ice cream cone.

Instead, think of a puppy – the twinkle in the puppy’s eyes, the wagging tail, the squeals of delight, the excitement, the playfulness.

Were you able to do it?

If so, you have just proven that you have control of your thoughts.  You were able to stop what you were thinking to think about the ice cream cone.  You were also able to stop thinking about the ice cream cone and begin thinking about the puppy .   – Page 13

As my mind went from the chocolate ice cream cone (Breyer’s – I’m an ice cream snob) to the bulldog puppy, I had a Wow, cool! moment.  My version of an A-HA moment.

Another favorite part of the book was in Chapter 8.  The author discusses the importance of identifying and eliminating what she calls “Destructive and Diseased Thoughts.”Appropriately enough, it’s the name of the chapter.

Mary J. Lore gives 3 wonderful “Rules of Thumb” for identifying a Destructive and Diseased Thought:

  1. Does the thought bring me peace or inspire me?
  2. Does the thought cause harm to others or to myself?
  3. Does the thought move me toward or away from what is significant and of value to me and to those involved?  – (Page 55, Managing Thought: How Do Your Thoughts Rule Your World?)

I love that – “Does the thought move me toward or away from what is significant and of value to me and to those involved?” We could really gain control of our thoughts if we put them into an interrogation room and asked what they had to say for themselves!

Why should we be so concerned with out thoughts?  As Mary J. Lore points out, “Every thought we’ve ever had has made us who we are today.”  That sort of makes you sit up and take notice, doesn’t it?  The thing is, 10 years from now, the thoughts we have between now and then will have made us who we are.

2019 wants us to steer our thoughts in the right direction – starting right now.

Managing Thought: How Do Your Thoughts Rule Your World? would like very, very much to show you how if you’ll allow it to.

You’ll Discover:

  • The mental and physical harm destructive and diseased thoughts have on you.
  • How to replace destructive thoughts with constructive thoughts.
  • How to find out what you truly want from life and how your thoughts can help you attain it.
  • How to keep from placing limits on yourself.
  • How to shape positive thoughts.
  • How to let go of a thought you want no part of.
  • How to keep your thoughts focused when difficult situations (and people!) try and challenge you.
  • How to manage your personal energy.
  • And so very much more!

As you practice watching your thoughts, you will find yourself dismissing those that are negative and disempowering.  In time, you will find that your thoughts are working for you, instead of against you.  You will find yourself  calm and at peace. – Mary J. Lore

Make no mistake about it, every thought we have is leading us somewhere.  Finally!  An atlas.