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Positive Thought

3 Simple Ways to Gain Get a Healthier Perspective on Life

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Our Lives Move in the Direction of Our Strongest Thought

What are YOUR Strongest Thoughts??

Stress and anxiety are realities of life and, quite frankly they always have been! I think we tend to think of them as new discoveries when, if we’re being honest, they’ve been around as long as humans have.

One of the worst things about feeling stressed and anxious is the fact that the feeling robs you of the beauty of the here and now. But, it goes even beyond this. Feeling stressed and anxious causes you to feel so overwhelmed that you lose, to a certain degree, any interest in tomorrow. It’s as though the overly-taxed mind says, “If today feels this bad, I sure hate to see what tomorrow feels like!”

This is why it is so vitally important to be proactive about dealing with stress. One of the first steps you can take is to decide… “Today is the day!” I will (not may) bring perspective back to my life and into my world. I will (not may) focus more on the people and things that truly matter in my life. My well-being and their well-being are too important to lose sight of!”

When you make up your mind to gain more perspective in your life and bring more focus into your own personal world, even the sun will look a little brighter!

Here are a few questions to ask yourself as you bring everything into perspective:

What are My Strongest Thoughts?

See the polar bear at the top of the page? He carries with him a wonderful quote by Craig Groeschel: Our lives move in the direction of our strongest thoughts.

This is so incredibly true – it sort of fleshes out another great quote – You are what you think you are. Many people believe that, to a very real extent, we create our own destinies within our minds. While there are millions of other contributing factors, our tomorrows are absolutely touched by the things we think about and focus on today.

What thoughts do you return to again and again? If you’re quiet for 5 minutes, in which direction do your thoughts run? Before falling asleep at night, what (generally speaking) are your last thoughts? These are usually your strongest thoughts because you give them strength each time you entertain them.

If these litlte Hercules thoughts are negative or worrisome, they’re feeding negativity in your life and causing small problems to loom large. When you’re able to recognize these toxic thoughts for what they are, you can replace them with productive, positive thoughts. Try focusing on things you are thankful for, happy memories, things you like about yourself, or even things you’re planning to do that give you happiness, purpose, and peace of mind.

Are You Taking Care of Your Health?

When we’re feeling stressed or anxious, we often tend to lean toward unhealthy lifestyles and meals. Ask yourself if you’re making your health a priority. Are you eating too much junk food? Do you get fresh air daily? Do you enjoy nature and rekindle the wonders of feeling sunshine on your skin?

Are you eating plenty of vegetables, fruits, and proteins?

How about your vitamin levels? When is the last time you had a complete checkup from your doctor? Very often, when our vitamins and minerals are off (even just a little off!), it affects every single corner of our life. If you haven’t had bloodwork done in over a year, please consider seeing your doctor. Your stress and anxiety may be attributed more to your body than to your circumstances.

We handle things better when we are better ABLE to handle them.

A nutritious diet is also vital to good health and to feeling like yourself. You need the nutrients that come from eating a healthy diet to fuel your brain and body to do great things.

Also, it’s easy to overlook but be sure you’re getting enough water too. Being even a little dehydrated can make you feel miserable physically and mentally.

Fresh air, daily activity, a balanced and healthy diet, and (when needed) daily supplements can help you more than you could ever realize.

Are You Staying in Contact with Loved Ones?

Stress and anxiety are relationship busters. Not because others avoid the person suffering from them but because, more times than not, the one feeling stressed avoids others. There is a tendency to hide away from others when one feels stressed out. Many people offer up reasons and they may or may not be spot on… but, personally, I think people tend to avoid others when they feel down simply because they feel like they can’t handle “anything else.”

When you feel like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders, you don’t want to put on a happy face or try to make your voice sound like you’re on top of the world when you feel like it’s on top of you.

While it’s easier to hide when you feel this way, it is of the utmost importance NOT to. You need your family and friends more than you may realize. Let them know how you feel – that you’re having a “bad day” (or week or month!). They want to help and, I’ll let you in on a secret, they may be feeling the same way! If that’s the case, you can help them by showing that it’s okay to admit when you need a lift.

Is Your Stress Controlling Your Life or Are You Controlling It?

This last question may seem overly simple but it is so vital. In fact, I want you to ask yourself these three questions routinely for a while until you’re able to HONESTLY give the answers you know you need to be able to give.

Please be proactive and take control of your stress and anxiety. Life is a big, beautiful place and I do not want you to miss a single moment. You deserve happiness and peace of mind and you deserve a healthy perspective on life. I hope and pray you will begin right this very minute creating everything in your world that you deserve. Don’t let stress or anxiety rob you of any more happiness and peace.


Helping Others: It’s Always the Right Time to Reach Out…

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It’s Always the Right Time to Reach Out and Help Others

While many things are returning to normal in many parts of the world, none of us are completely back to normal. In fact, for a lot of people, normal may look, sound, smell, and certainly feel different for quite a while.

Maybe forever.

Before you let that make you frown, realize that not all change is bad. In fact, some change can be a very good, positive thing.

What if we all come out of this pandemic more willing to reach out and help others than we have ever been willing before? What if the consideration and concern for our neighbors (very near and very far) that we’ve experienced and displayed lasts… well… forever?

I for one certainly hope so!

I have a great deal of correspondence with others through my e-mail and social media. I have noticed over the past year more of us are apt to sign off with things such as…

  • Stay Safe!
  • Be Well!
  • Best Wishes to You and Your Family!
  • Etc..

I also notice many greetings begin with..

  • I hope you’re well…
  • I hope you’re safe…
  • I hope you and your loved ones are well…

It didn’t used to be like this.

When I’m in stores and restaurants (still riding an emotional high that my favorite Mexican restaurant weathered this storm and is open for business!), I see people smiling at one another these days – the warm smiles aren’t just reserved for babies anymore! People seem to genuinely care for others post-pandemic than they did pre-pandemic and that’s something I very, very, VERY much sticks around.

Many people are struggling today – more, perhaps, than ever before. The pandemic introduced a lot of unpleasantness into our lives. Some unpleasantness we could SEE – lockdowns, less family visits, less income, arguments with family members who view the virus differently than we do, and a total upheaval in our daily lives. Other unpleasantnesses couldn’t be seen, but my goodness are they ever felt.

  • the anxiety that comes with coming face to face with your own vulnerability
  • stress from seeing, daily, others sick and suffering
  • being more aware of death than ever before… I mean, we were given daily numbers!
  • arguments within families due to more stress
  • broken relationships because of other’s views on the virus, masks, and vaccines

Make no mistake about it, this pandemic left its vile fingerprints on all of our lives.

It’s worth remembering that you don’t have to always be strong. You can cry when you darn well feel like crying! It’s okay to feel scared and I’m giving you permission to feel angry about the whole thing. Feel the emotions you want to feel and make no attempt to tell others how to deal with their feelings. We all cope differently and we all heal differently.

Finally, I’d love to encourage everyone to reach out and help others in any way possible. If you know someone who seems to have the weight of the world on their shoulders, either ask them what you can do to make the load lighter or (perhaps even better) step up and do something for them that helps lighten their load.

Ideas include mowing their lawn, giving them a gift card to their favorite restaurant (this way you help them and the restaurant), offering to watch their child/children while they treat themselves to a day out. Simply showing up to their house with a Starbucks drink for you and a Starbucks drink for them and sitting to talk with them for an hour may be just the tonic they (and you!) need.

Many are dealing with anxiety, stress, depression, and other emotional and mental strains right now. If you can be a blessing to someone, please don’t hesitate to do so. You may give them exactly what they needed to hang in there and keep fighting.

As a bonus, helping others makes you feel so good!

Stay strong, stay well, and stay safe. I truly care about each and every one of you. ~ Joi (“Joy”)

Never Try to Be Someone You’re Not…. Be YOU!

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Quote About Being Yourself

Be Yourself… Always

Something that bumfuzzles and frustrates me nearly to the point of being speechless is when people try to be anyone and everyone except for the only one they’re meant to be… themselves!

Undoubtedly you’ve seen these birds, yourself…

  • The lady who posts pictures of herself from the gym (multiple pics from ONE trip, mind you), talking about how much fitness matters to her… calling herself a gym rat…yet you know, full well (and evidence will bear you out) she went the ONE time. She wants to appear to be fitness-minded when she really isn’t. Why?
  • The man who happens to be a night owl, yet seems convinced that everyone he’s trying to impress in the world expects him to be an early bird. So he shuts off the late night movie he happens to be enjoying, heads to bed, then drags himself out of bed at 5:00 the next morning, crowing to the world, “I’m up! I’m up! I’m UPPPPP! Look, Twitter… I’m up with the roosters!” Why?
  • The girl who really isn’t into name brands or even clothes for that matter. She’d much rather spend her money on books or toys for her dog…. but the “cool girls” wear only the most expensive jeans and she has to fit in, right? Why?
  • The college student who eats just like the rest of us, but thinks he’ll impress more people if he claims to be Keto. Why?

I think the answer to each why is the same – they aren’t completely comfortable in their own skin, so they want to slip into someone else’s skin. Sounds creepy.. and to an extent, it kind of is. Thing is, when people hop on social media and try to paint themselves in a certain way, they’re only making their own self image issues and lack of confidence worse. They’re creating a “them” that doesn’t even exist, so when they look at this fake image (like a false god from Old Testament times!)… there’s nothing there!

If you ever find yourself creating a dream scenario of yourself – stop before you even begin. If you’re eating a hamburger, own it! Say, “I’m eating a hamburger, and if you think that’s something, you should see the fries!”

Don’t like working out? Admit it, no one will hate you for it.  I haven’t attempted anything near a “work out” in 6-7 years, but best I can remember I hated it! If you want to let the world know what you’re doing – be honest about it. Sitting in your favorite chair, watching your favorite television show, give it a shout out. Reading a great author, recommend the book. THIS is the way you find like-minded friends and THIS is the way you learn to both meet and like yourself.

Think about it, if the people you’re so worried about impressing wouldn’t like or respect the real you…. why are you even wasting your time with them?


Five Ways to Boost Your Happiness this Winter

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Snowy Day

by Matt Gregory

When you consider the fact that sunlight is one of the best ways to increase your serotonin levels, it will come as no surprise that the winter months, with shorter, darker days, can lead to a lower mood than usual.

The holidays themselves can be an emotional time, too; there is a lot of pressure to spend, to be out with family and friends and having fun that can have a detrimental effect on those that may be struggling with loneliness, money worries or are unable to see loved ones as much as they would like, if at all. If this sounds familiar, then do not despair because there are so many things you can do that will easily help elevate your mood in next to no time.

Self–Care

“The way to health, harmony and happiness is primarily mental”
– Grenville Kleiser, from ‘Inspiration and Ideals’

Self-care is one of the best ways to instantly lift your mood when the cold weather starts to get you down. Making plans to curl up with a good book under a blanket and enjoy your favorite hot drink is a great way to self soothe these feelings away. Alternatively, you could pamper yourself with a leisurely bath to help relieve the stress and tension of your day, book yourself in for a massage or hair cut or make some time for exercise. Make some ‘me’ time to really reconnect with yourself and feel good within yourself.

Pay it Forward

“The best way to cheer yourself up is to try and cheer someone else up”
 – Mark Twain

One of the quickest and easiest ways to boost your personal happiness is to pay it forward. Any form of charity, whether it’s simply buying a coffee for someone in need or giving to charity as part of your everyday life – such as the compulsory zakat donations made by Muslims, culminating in the celebration of Eid – can lift your mood in a way like nothing else does.

However you choose to pay it forward – donating to a local food bank, baking cookies for the neighbours or offering support for a friend in need – it costs nothing to be kind, but the rewards are endless.

Do more of what makes you Happy

“If you want to be happy, be”
– Leo Tolstoy

Sometimes, life can get stressful and we forget about the little things that help us feel more aligned with ourselves and ultimately, bring joy to our lives. Listening to our favorite music and having a singalong, reading an old classic, going to the gym, taking the dog for an extra–long walk, writing, baking, prayer… there are so many things that make us happy that can get lost along the way when life gets a little hectic. Taking some time to do more of these things is a great way to boost your happiness.

Take up a new hobby

“I am not young enough to know everything”
– Oscar Wilde

Learning a new skill or taking up a new hobby can be overwhelming at the best of times, especially if you have been putting it off for a while. Overcome your fear and embrace learning – the self-confidence and sense of worth that you receive in return will be more than worth it.

Take that pottery class, learn a new language, teach yourself coding or knitting – whatever it is you’ve always wanted to do – seize the day and watch the smile creep back on to your face in the process.

Leave negativity behind

“Laughter is the sun the drives winter from the human face”
– Victor Hugo

Letting go of negativity in your life is one of the greatest ways to improve overall feelings of happiness. That being said, it isn’t an easy thing to do, and it’s something that needs to be worked on over time. Bad habits can be broken, though – with a little persistence and practise. Create positive endorphins and improve your physical and mental health by exercising more regularly – and this will put you in a great mindset for kicking those bad habits.

Letting go of anger, not holding grudges, not partaking in gossip, focus on the positives in every situation, and appreciate everything that you have. Remove drama from your life, recite positive affirmations and set achievable goals. Rest well, eat well, be more productive. Lastly, learn your limits and when to say no. This is a process but one that you can start right now!

By taking just a few positive steps, you could be reaping the rewards this winter. Not only that, but these are things that will stick with you long after the snow has melted and the sun is back in our lives.

Altruism – What is it and How do you Practice it?

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by Matt Gregory

Altruism – What is it and How do you Practice it?

There are very few actual altruistic acts in the world. Even those that may appear to be altruistic often come with an underlying benefit to the person or party performing such an act. 

Altruism is an act of kindness that benefits only those on the receiving end, in no way benefiting the giving party in any way shape or form. That means no financial rewards, no expectation of reciprocation and not publicising the act themselves as this can be seen as boasting in order to improve their own reputation and how they are perceived by others.

When an Altruistic Act May not be as it Seems

Before we continue, let us be clear – simply because an act is not 100% altruistic does not mean that it is not thoughtful and is not an act of good. People can perform an act for good that benefits either a single person, or a wider group, and themselves benefit in some way shape or form.

The best example of when an apparent altruistic act isn’t altruistic at all is when either a celebrity or business perform an act of charity as part of a PR campaign. While they are, in fact, helping others and, in twine, raising awareness for an issue, there is a separate goal that caters to that celebrity of business’ perception in the public domain. They are wanting to be seen to be doing good in the community – this is not true altruism, although it is still a thoughtful act of kindness.

What is an Altruistic Act?

If an act is truly altruistic, you probably wouldn’t have heard about it unless those on the receiving end have broadcast it. An act of true kindness if performed with the sole intention of benefiting someone else without being broadcast and/or utilised in any way to benefit the giving party is altruistic.

Charity is often the central point for an altruistic act, with donors giving money – either on a one-off or regular basis – for a cause close to their heart. In Islam, such a donation is known as Sadaqah – where Muslims perform the act of giving or helping for good. You can find more information here on this religious practice.

Are There Enough Truly Altruistic Acts Performed Today?

Because of the point already raised earlier on in this article, it is hard to know how altruistic modern society truly is because you likely won’t hear about an act of altruism. With that being said, millions of people around the world continue to live in poverty, unable to provide for their families, children being sent to work instead of gaining an education and homeless sleeping rough on the streets.

On that basis, you would have to say that not enough acts are being performed as there are more than enough resources to ensure that not a single person has to starve, sleep rough or be denied access to education. While many are undoubtedly performed every day, there is certainly room for more…there always is.

How to Perform an Act of Altruism

You can perform an act of altruism by simply helping someone sleeping rough on the street by giving them a sandwich, something to drink, a blanket or a change of clothes without the need for posting about it across your social media profiles. There are also thousands of charities that would be highly grateful to receive whatever you can afford to give.

Equally, an act of altruism doesn’t have to benefit a stranger as you can also do something for a friend and/or relative that may be struggling. Simply taking the time to have a conversation with someone when no one else is there can be considered an act of altruism.